


Perfect Stranger

by MajinPiccolo



Category: Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Super, Dragon Ball Z
Genre: Adventure, Arcosian, Frieza Race, Frost Demons, Icejin, M/M, Mild Language, Non-Canon Relationship, Romance, Slow Burn, Yamza - Freeform, come on guys can we get an official name for Frieza's race please?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:55:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 54,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23322805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MajinPiccolo/pseuds/MajinPiccolo
Summary: When Yamcha wishes for more strength than a human body can handle the dragon instead transforms him into a member of Frieza's race. Hungry for a chance to prove himself and win the respect of his friends he heads out into space, planning to defeat the tyrant once and for all... but things don't exactly work out as he'd expected.A story about two men, two transformations, two relationships, and how opposites attract.
Relationships: Frieza/Yamcha (Dragon Ball)
Comments: 204
Kudos: 134





	1. Power Is Yet Unknown

**Author's Note:**

> This story was inspired by the INCREDIBLE [Icejin Yamcha design](https://www.instagram.com/p/B84-XRJlp6E/) that Insta fan artist pen.lilixeesketche created. Please go check out Pen's work- aside from the design that was my muse you'll also see tons of cute Yamza and great art in general.
> 
> Also! Please note this story takes place a little after DBS Broly, and follows the anime continuity.

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter One: Power Is Yet Unknown

It had been a beautiful morning…

Then the sky went from a gorgeous sunrise to pitch dark in a matter of moments, and Yamcha, Puar, and Krillin stared up at the Dragon who’s magic had caused the sudden black out. 

“This is it, buddy,” Krillin spoke, his hands clenching into fists. “We make this wish, and we’ll be as strong as the Saiyans. Maybe stronger!” 

Yamcha nodded, his serious expression slowly brightening into a big grin. “No more being the jokes of the team. Everyone is gonna have to respect us once they see our new strength!”

“Yeah, and when we show them what we’re planning to do to prove it… They’re gonna freak!” The shorter man was smiling too at this point. 

“Just, please be safe, both of you!” Puar was the only one who seemed concerned, but Yamcha gave him a reassuring pat. 

“We’ll be a lot safer after this wish is made, don’t you worry.” 

“So are we ready to do this?” Krillin asked. 

“If you aren’t then why are you wasting my time?” The dragon asked from the sky, and the mortals present all flinched.

“It’s now or never,” Yamcha shrugged, then looked up at Shenron and shouted, “Eternal Dragon! We have one wish today. We might just be Earthlings, but we’re wishing for the strength to score a crushing defeat against Frieza!” 

The group waited expectedly, and Shenron paused- then almost shrugged. “The sort of power you seek is too much for a human body to be capable of handling. I can not grant this.”

“Really?! Oh man, after all of the time we spent planning this and gathering the balls it won’t work?” Krillin slumped.

Yamcha didn’t answer and instead asked, “if it’s too much for this body… Hey Shenron, what if I wasn’t a human?” 

“It shall be done.” 

“W-wait, that wasn’t the wish!” It was too late- the dragon’s eyes flashed, and a blinding glow covered Yamcha’s body before the sky cleared and the balls once again scattered. Almost instantly a strange feeling of raw, overwhelming power filled the taller man. “Hey, I think it worked after all-“ 

Puar and Krillin turned to him- and both screamed. 

\- - - 

“Vegeta, stop it! That’s Yamcha!” Krillin shouted, trying ineffectively to pull the Saiyan prince off of their friend. 

“Y-yamcha?! Are you crazy? That’s clearly-“ Bulma’s eyes went wide, then she dived between her husband and her ex. “Stop, he’s not kidding!” 

Vegeta immediately ceased his attack to avoid hitting his wife and dropped back from Super Saiyan into his base form, standing up. From under him slowly stood a tall being with horns, a long tail… and a distinctive set of facial scars. Crossing his arms and staring at the floor, he spoke in a familiar voice. “Yeah… it’s me alright.” 

Bulma leaned forward. “Yep, Yamcha, no question about it. But what happened to you?! You look like Frieza’s family!” 

“An Icejin,” Vegeta corrected, still glaring at the former human. “That’s what Frieza’s race is called.” 

“Yes, there’s no question he’s somehow now the same species as they were,” Krillin agreed. 

“Well?” Vegeta asked, “How did this happen?” 

Embarrassed, Yamcha and Krillin exchanged glances, then explained what they’d planned to wish for and how it had went wrong. 

“It was supposed to be a question, not the wish. I’d been thinking more like if we asked to be turned into Saiyans or something. But uh, I guess the Dragon put it together with our failed wish and just assumed that was what I wanted.” 

“Thanks to his misunderstanding of the semantics of the wish I was spared from looking like, well, that,” Krillin sighed, “but I lost out on the potential to get all that new power, man what a bummer.” 

“How much stronger are you now, Yamcha?” Android 18, who’d been called over by her husband, inquired. 

“Probably not much,” Vegeta sneered. “Not all Icejins are as strong as Frieza. His bloodline is the product of a mutation that gave them their unusual ability-“ 

“But what about Frost? He was pretty strong too-“ 

“He was Frieza’s direct counterpart, remember? Anyway, Yamcha is likely a bit more resilient but that’s about it.” 

“A lot more resilient!” Puar insisted. “He took a full power hit from a Super Saiyan and was able to stand right back up!” 

Yamcha nodded, “that’s right. He only knocked me down because I wasn’t expecting someone who’s supposedly my ally to attack me out of the blue like that. I mean come on, I came to Capsule Corp because I thought you guys would help me, not try and kill me! That said… I’m a lot stronger, I can feel it. Shenron must have given me that same mutation!” 

“If you’re so sure,” Vegeta stepped forward, “then let’s see if your fists can back it up, go on, give me your worst. One punch, as hard as you can. Try and see if you can make me flinch.” 

“Okay, but…” with a little smirk he looked down at Vegeta- while he’d always had a few inches on the short Saiyan, he’d grown even taller thanks to the extra inches his upwardly curved horns provided when he became an alien- and asked, “I don’t think Bulma would like it if I totally mangled you so can you at least go Blue first?” 

“Don’t get cocky, you’ll just embarrass yourself more-“ 

“Do it, Vegeta! I’m dying of curiosity here!” Krillin pleaded. 

“Oh, whatever, it’s your own funeral.” Vegeta powered up. Yamcha approached him and lifted his fist. “What, not going to bother trying to power up?”

“I don’t think I really need to,” Yamcha shrugged- then right as he threw the punch he stopped suppressing his Ki for just the briefest of moments, just long enough for those present that could sense it to be stunned- and sent a shocked Vegeta flying across the room. 

“So anyway, I’m gonna use this new strength to singlehandedly beat Frieza, then since we only used one wish I won’t have to wait that long for the Dragon Balls to regenerate so I can get my old body back.” 

As Bulma helped her husband to his feet, Yamcha shared his full plan to make the most of this form. He hadn’t expected further pushback. 

“No way, revenge against that bastard is mine, I’m not going to let someone who knows next to nothing of how horrible he is take that away from me!” Vegeta, dusting himself off as he tried to regain his dignity, said from the other side of the room. 

Yamcha shook his head. “Sorry you but I’m set on this. After being on the sidelines for so long I want to seize this one chance to do my part to protect the Earth!”

“Does it have to be Frieza though?” Bulma asked, “Why not wait for someone else? You’re a lot stronger but just jumping right into going after someone like that after hardly even training for the last few years seems ill advised.” 

“But look at me! I don’t wanna stay in this form any longer than I have to- I don’t think this whole look is exactly gonna do wonders for my dating life!” 

“You’d be surprised what some people are into,” 18 replied. When everyone stared at her she just shrugged and looked at the floor. “I didn’t _necessarily_ say _I_ was into it, geez.” 

“Anyway, if time is your biggest concern then you have a much larger issue to contend with,” Vegeta stated. 

“Oh yeah? And what are you getting at?” 

“Your lack of training. Being able to land one good hit on a fully open opponent doesn’t mean you’d be able to do the same thing in real combat,” the Saiyan explained. “To get your proper fighter’s instincts back would take extensive training after all your slacking, and beyond that, your body needs to learn how to fully use your new strength. With such a sudden jump, I’m willing to bet you’re subconsciously holding back slightly simply because your brain hasn’t fully learned to trust what your body can do now.” 

“Sorry buddy, but he’s right!” Krillin chimed in, “when you hit him earlier there was a lot of raw power in it but it was slow, human level slow. You’ve got a lot of work to do!” 

“Ugh, fine! I’ll train then! A week should be good, right?” 

“Maybe if you used the room of Spirit and Time to make one of those days a year-“ 

“I don’t wanna be like this that long, even if it’s only a day in the regular world! I’m not getting any younger here!” 

After a considerable amount of back and forth, Yamcha, defeated, resigned himself to training, starting the following day.

Waiting at Capsule Corp until nightfall provided his extremely alien looking new form with some cover, Yamcha and Puar finally went to head home for the night an hour after Krillin and 18 had left. But as he approached the door he was stopped first by neglecting to account for the extra height of his horns and catching them on the doorframe, then by Vegeta’s voice behind him. “Wait a moment.” 

“Huh?”

His expression a mix of ‘conflicted’ and ‘sheer disgust,’ the Saiyan approached him. “I’ve been thinking… There’s a more efficient way you can completely destroy Frieza than just outright battle.” 

“What do you mean? I thought you wanted to be the one to defeat him?” 

“There’s a way you can not only get his guard down and easily kill him even with your current imperfect strength, but also utterly destroy him mentally while you’re at it. To be blunt, you are in a unique position to hurt him far worse than I ever could.” 

“And how’s that?” Yamcha couldn’t help but get excited. This was exactly the sort of thing he was hoping for! …until Vegeta spat out-

“Seduce him.”

“WAIT. WHAT?!” 

End Chapter One: Power Is Yet Unknown

Author’s note: So yeah this fic destroyed my writer’s block and just… flowed out and became the longest and possibly best thing I’ve wrote in ages and has been a great distraction through all the current stress of life. The whole fic is complete in first draft form, I’ll be uploading as I’m editing so probably two or three chapters a week. And again, please go check out the amazing [pen.lilixeesketche](https://www.instagram.com/pen.lilixeesketche/) on insta, not just for the flawless Icejin Yamcha design that inspired all this, but also for super cute Yamza and some nice OCs! And share my love with Pen please, I don’t have an insta account so I can’t do it myself. That said I had a friend who does ask and got permission to use the design for this fic, remember kids, ALWAYS credit artists and your inspiration. Don’t be a jerk.


	2. Opportunities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vegeta shares his plan, and Yamcha heads off to space armed with a vague understanding of Icejin biology, a gift guaranteed to get Frieza's attention, and... dance lessons?

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Two: Opportunities 

A very confused- and temporarily very much not human- Yamcha followed Vegeta to the Gravity Room (“the only place here where we can be guaranteed any peace,” Vegeta had explained). 

“Is this a joke?” He asked once they were inside and the door closed. Vegeta sighed, the look of disgust never leaving his face. 

“Would I joke about something so nauseating?” 

“Good point. You don’t really joke much in general. So uh, seducing Frieza? You mean like, with the promise of more power or something?” 

“No you idiot. I mean with your body.” 

“OH. That’s… uh… I can’t do that! I’m not gonna have sex with someone I hate!” 

Vegeta shuddered. “I’m not telling you to actually go through with that repulsive act with him! What I’m suggesting is you make him fall for you, lead him on, then betray him, fully destroying him psychologically and physically in the process.”

“And you think I can do that because I’m the same species as him? Are you even sure Frieza likes guys?” 

“Icejins don’t have a binary biological gender like most Saiyans or humans do-“ 

“Hold up a sec-“ Yamcha stared down between his legs in horror. “Does that mean- oh no- WHERE IS MY DICK?!” 

“Stop being an idiot and let me finish explaining!” Vegeta shouted, and a wide eyed Yamcha nodded. “Poke around down there a bit at some point where I can NOT see you and you’ll figure it all out. Anyway, I’ve spent enough time around Frieza- years in fact, including when he was younger and considerably less emotionally guarded- to know he does prefer more masculinely presenting beings. Beyond that, he has a type. The handful of times I’ve seen him interact with his own race, as well as seeing which historical figures and celebrities fascinated him-“ 

“Icejin celebrities? Like, idols?” Yamcha couldn’t help but snicker as his mind for whatever reason went to the thought of Frost in a sparkly outfit dancing and singing a pop song. 

“Military leaders, scientists and the like.” 

“Oh. I guess that seems more in keeping with what I know about them, can’t say I’m not a little disappointed though-“

“Can we get back on track here? I’m not exactly enjoying this conversation!” 

“Sorry, sorry. So what’s his type?” 

“Tall. Strong. Rugged, kinda wild. A bit silly, goofy even. Warm personality. And he likes them dumber than he is. Bulma once described her and myself as a case of ‘opposites attract,’ well, that’s what Frieza’s into as well. Sound like anyone you know?” 

“I resent that ‘dumber’ part, but I guess I see what you’re saying… that is a bit like me.” 

“Furthermore, he hides it as an adult but I knew him as a teenager- he’s an absolute sucker for romance. He wants someone to sweep him off his feet but no one is brave- or stupid- enough to try it. You’re into all that crap, right? Sweet talk and holding hands and that repellent sort of behavior?” 

“I could try it but I don’t know if I’m good at it-“ 

“Bulma says you were… good with compliments. So use that on Frieza.” 

“Aww, she says nice things about me to you?”

“Only when she’s nagging me, don’t get too excited about it.” 

“That’s disappointing.” 

“Anyway, between your personality and looks being what he’s weak for, and the fact that you’ll be doing something no one else has had the guts to do- seriously pursue him romantically- you’ll have unique access to him.” 

Yamcha sighed. “It still seems like a far fetched plan. Hearts are complicated! And Frieza isn’t a complete idiot! It’s not that easy to win someone over, especially someone as scary as he is-“ 

“Do you want to spend a year in this body training to fight him or do you want to take the shortcut and get to be a human again in a couple months? Come on Yamcha. I know him. He’s fascinated by people who have lived the sorts of lives he can’t.”

“I’m pretty sure he can live however he damn well pleases. He’s the ruler of space!” 

“That is exactly the reason he can’t. Because of his station he has an obligation to always look strong, in control, and present. You were a bandit weren’t you? Bulma says you were downright feral when she met you. Frieza never had that sort of freedom.” 

Sitting down to think it over (and pausing to move the tail he kept forgetting he now had out from under him in the process) Yamcha mulled over the pros and cons. If Vegeta was right and this was as easy as he claimed it would be, he’d be able to defeat a major villain, win the respect of his friends, and have his old appearance restored sooner rather than later… Maybe it was worth a shot? As strong as he was now, if it backfired he could always escape with his life thanks to his new Icejin resilience even if he didn’t have enough mastery of his strength to win a regular battle… 

“Okay! How hard can it really be to get the emperor of the universe, the most feared and evil being to ever live, wrapped around my finger?” Yamcha laughed nervously. “I’ll do it! I guess I can borrow a ship from Capsule Corp and head out tomorrow-“ 

“You idiot! Of course not!” 

“And I’m confused again.” 

Vegeta crossed his arms and closed his eyes. “If you just go running off trying to find Frieza how are you even going to get close enough to take a chance at him? He’s a tyrant, not just some regular civilian. Furthermore, if you show up looking like an Icejin but acting like a human he’ll be instantly suspicious.” 

“Sooo… I’m assuming you have a solution in mind?” 

“Of course. I don’t like it and neither will you, but if we keep the end goal in mind I think we can both push through it. Show up here tomorrow morning at six for special training. Don’t be late.” 

Yamcha shrugged, paused for a distracted moment to delicately touch his shoulders, tracing the biogems, then returned his attention to the Saiyan after Vegeta cleared his throat. “Okay, yeah, I’ll be there, I wanna make this work. Oh, and if I am gonna go for this, let’s… maybe not tell the others?”

“Why? So no one will laugh at you if you fail?” 

“Geez you’re tactless. That’s part of it, but also Goku… I seriously think that guy would prefer if Frieza stuck around sometimes, just so he can have an excuse to keep fighting him. So let’s just tell him and the rest that I’m traveling so that he has no reason to chase me down with his Instant Transmission and try to talk me out of it.” 

“Fine then.” 

\- - - 

The following morning, true to his word the faux Icejin returned to the gravity room. Vegeta was standing near the entrance tapping his foot as Yamcha paced excitedly in circles, rambling on about his first night in his temporary new body. 

“-and everything tasted so good! It’s like even my tastebuds are stronger! Then after dinner I’m trying to brush my teeth, right? But get this, I hadn’t noticed but my teeth are really sharp, between that and my new strength I broke the toothbrush! So I get out a new one and am reeeeeeeally careful and manage to finish without issue and I go to head to bed and I just can’t get comfortable! How are you supposed to sleep with a tail anyway? Come to think of it you used to have one right? How did you sleep back when you had a tail? Anyway I wound up-“

“WILL YOU SHUT UP SO WE CAN GET STARTED?!” Vegeta finally broke. 

Yamcha flinched, stopped pacing, and sat down on the floor, nodding. “Sorry, sorry, it’s just been… really strange. But I’m ready to get to my training!” 

“Good. Now you’d better listen carefully, I don’t want to have to repeat any of this. We’ll be covering two things- enough basics to make you believable as an Icejin, and your cover story. If there’s any of this you do not commit one hundred percent to heart Frieza will see right through you and this whole awful series of events will have been for nothing, do I make myself clear?” 

“Clear as mud but I’ll try my best!” Yamcha laughed. “So this cover story, is that gonna be what helps me actually get a chance to meet him?” 

“That’s right. You may remember, Frieza had his men searching Namek for the Dragon Balls as soon as he heard a believable account that they worked? That was hardly the first time he developed an obsessive fascination for an item with magical abilities. For several years during the least painful part of our working relationship he was constantly researching and looking for something, an item described in the folklore of his own race.” 

“I’m guessing it must have done something pretty cool if he was so interested in it?” Yamcha asked. 

“That’s right. It was a statue of a famous king from the prehistory of his people. Some of the stories claimed it would grant it’s owner their heart’s greatest, truest desire.”

“That’s cool and all, but it seems weird that someone like Frieza would be so interested in what, from how you describe it, just sounds like a bedtime story.” 

“You’re right,” Vegeta agreed, “but Frieza’s interests were fairly selective. He didn’t chase after just any exaggerated legend. Much like the Dragon Balls, there was enough credible documentation over the years to suggest that the statue did physically exist, even if it was still unproven if it actually had any special abilities.” 

“So like, do you think I should tell Frieza I know some new info about it or something?” 

“No, we’ll do better than that,” Vegeta smirked. “The most recent trustable account of the statue’s existence was from around one hundred Earth years ago, when supposedly a lost tribe of Icejin were found on a planet not too far from my own home world. There was an account that it was on display in their leader’s home. Frieza of course did his own search of that world but found nothing.”

“Should I say I’m from that tribe?” 

“That’s right,” Vegeta nodded. “It will explain the fact that you aren’t exactly familiar with the typical culture of his people, and give you a special hook to catch his attention right off the bat.” 

“Is he really gonna believe that? I mean, you said he couldn’t find those people or that statue. How am I supposed to convince him?”

At this, the Saiyan prince’s displeased expression finally changed into a little smile. “Because the statue exists, and you’re going to give it to him.” 

“Seriously?!” 

“That’s right. The reason Frieza couldn’t find it was because I already had. When I was quite young one of my training missions was on that very planet. It was practice for the more difficult planet clearing missions I’d eventually be going on. We hadn’t been aware of that Icejin colony as they, like Kakarot and you Earthlings, had figured out how to hide their energy. When I found them, I killed them, and took the statue as a souvenir of sorts.” 

Even having first met Vegeta back in his very much evil days it was still chilling to hear him speak so casually of his violent past, but Yamcha didn’t say anything and just shivered a little as Vegeta continued, “Of course, it seems the rumors of it’s magic were just that, rumors. So I wound up giving it to my younger brother Tarble. I managed to get in contact with him overnight and confirmed he took it with him when he was sent off from our home planet, so it survived it’s destruction. He had it sent back to me here on Earth via the galactic post this morning.”

“Damn… it’s amazing that worked out!” 

“Indeed. When I later found out Frieza was so interested in it keeping my knowledge of it’s location from him was one of the few ways I could rebel against his rule over me, but to think that all these years later it will become part of my revenge! I suppose in a way it’s granting me my heart’s truest desire after all! Anyway, as long as you stick to the backstory and try to avoid getting yourself caught up in anything too complicated then even you should be able to gain Frieza’s interest with this. The statue will guarantee a meeting, and from there just hit him with your ‘big hunky idiot’ charm and he’ll fall hard and fast.” 

“That’s at least the second time you’ve insulted my intelligence since we started working together for this you know.” 

“And it likely won’t be the last.” 

“…you’re mean.” 

“And Frieza is even meaner, so let’s get back on topic so we can get this vengeance started?” 

“Right, gotcha. So this is pretty perfect for a cover! It gets me a meeting with Frieza, gives him a reason to want to get to know me, and excuses my complete lack of knowledge of Icejin cultural stuff! So with this I’m all set, guess I can finally head out-“ 

“Will you stop jumping the gun?!” 

“What is it this time?” Yamcha was halfway to the door, but turned back when Vegeta called out after him. As he stepped back toward his collaborator he neglected to straighten his tail back out behind him and tripped rather dramatically over it. “I uh, meant to do that,” he laughed, fully aware that he was fooling no one. 

“You’ve just proven the point I’m about to make you idiot. We might have a reason for you to lack a considerable amount of knowledge about the rest of your race, but you’re still completely unbelievable as the actual owner of that body. Pull a clumsy stunt like what you just did in front of Frieza and his guard will immediately be back up!” 

“I guess… so I’ll practice with the tail a little before I go.” 

“It’s not just the tail. You hit low doorframes with your horns, and move like someone who isn’t used to their shape. Furthermore I suspect that if you tried to move any quicker than a walk it would be obvious you’ve never tried running with those feet. Even Bulma was saying this morning that your movements are completely ungainly.” 

“Okay, okay, I get it. I’ll practice all my movements in general. That’ll give me something to do while I’m flying off into space-“ 

“There’s one more thing.” Yamcha waited, but Vegeta didn’t seem to want to finish that thought, the look of disgust that had been present on his face this entire time somehow managing to get even worse. After nearly a full minute of silence had passed, the former human lost patience. 

“Uh, either share it or leave me to figure it out, but either way I wanna get going-“ 

“I’m working up to it!” Vegeta spat out, then took a deep breath and continued. “If… if you’re romancing Frieza there’s a chance the topic of conversation could get… intimate… so you need to know how… reproduction works. As you’ve already so astutely observed on yourself, and likely noticed on Frieza while he was wandering around naked in his fourth form, under normal circumstances Icejin lack externally present genitals-“ 

Yamcha couldn’t help himself and had a good loud laugh at his teacher’s discomfort before giving him a good natured slap on the back and saying, “Oh Vegeta, you don’t need to worry, I already figured it alll out! I had to do something while I was laying in bed trying to get comfortable last night, so I took your recommendation to heart and did a little exploration with my hand and-“ 

Vegeta could take no more and blasted Yamcha across the room. Thanks to his new body’s incredible resilience the powerful attack didn’t actually injure him, but it still took him a moment to untangle himself from his tail and get back up. He still looked amused, so with a growl Vegeta crossed his arms and turned away. “There’s a lot more to it than that but you know what? I’m not going to tell you if you’re going to behave like this! Figure it out yourself if that’s so enjoyable to you!” 

“You’ve got it!” Yamcha laughed. “I’m off!” 

\- - - 

“So as long as there aren’t any unexpected obstacles all you’ll have to do is sit back and wait while the ship takes you to one of Frieza’s former bases.” Bulma’s lesson on flying the spacecraft was a pretty quick one, a fact that Yamcha was pretty grateful for, as he was still itching to get the plan into motion. “Everything is preprogrammed with the coordinates Vegeta gave me, but once you’re there you’ll have to destroy the ship to cover your tracks, so here-“ she handed him a slip of paper with a string of numbers on it, “-you’ll need to memorize this and figure out how to translate it into something a ship borrowed from Frieza will understand, but as long as you’ve got Earth’s coordinates you’ll be able to navigate your way back home.” 

“Thanks Bulma! This is all a huge help, if I’m not having to directly control the ship that’ll give me more time to practice with this body.” 

“About that, actually…” Bulma grabbed a box from the supplies that had been loaded into the ship and pulled out a small tablet and powered it on, navigating in a few quick swipes to the device’s video library. “I was thinking this might help you out a bit in that regard, actually!” 

Yamcha took a look at the screen. “Dance lessons? Seriously? Man, this takes me back!”

Bulma laughed a little. “Right? It’s been so long since I bullied you into learning to dance with me. But I think it could help here if you went back to practicing! Even in your normal body you could stand to learn some grace, outside of combat and baseball you always move like you’ve got two left feet. And who knows, Vegeta says Frieza’s a secret romantic right? So maybe he’ll want you to dance with him.” 

Yamcha sighed. “I still can’t believe I agreed to try and get him to fall for me. This whole plan is great on paper but it all hinges on something that seems so impossible. Even if I’m theoretically his type, well, he’s the emperor of space and I’m the king of being unlucky in love-“ 

His ex cut him off with a raised hand. “Look, I think when it comes to that topic I’m more qualified than anyone to assess your likelihood at succeeding here. You survived years with me, and Frieza couldn’t possibly be any more high maintenance than I was, so this will be a peace of cake for you!” They both laughed a little at that, then Bulma added in a more serious tone, “Anyway, as someone who remembers what it was like to be completely infatuated, I know the key to your appeal is your unique mix of confidence, vulnerability, and kindness. Dazzle Frieza with that and he won’t be able to stand a chance against your charm!” 

“Well, you’ve certainly made me feel better about this, at least a little!” With that he briefly stepped back out of the ship to give Puar a parting hug. 

As he started to close the ship’s hatch, Vegeta shouted, “Don’t make me regret suggesting this! Grab that bastard by the heart and then completely destroy him!” 

“Oh, I plan to! See you all later!” A moment later the ship fired up it’s thrusters and he set off… 

End Chapter Two: Opportunities 

Author’s note: Next chapter our boys finally meet… 

My usual disclaimer on Icejin biology applies- don’t overthink anything I write. I just go with whatever, and that particular interpretation is a pretty popular one so I use it a lot, but honestly things like whether they have a binary gender or not are all up to anyone’s individual head canons. I’m literally good with any of it. 

A tradition of my fanfics is to recommend other fics I wrote in the notes, so if you want to see a totally different take on the ‘Yamcha tries to take down Frieza on his own by pretending to be loyal to him” premise, check out my very first Yamza fic, The Bond Between a Lizard and a Wolf. Another tradition is to beg for comments and kudos so uh, yeah, know they make my day every single time.


	3. A Beautiful Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamcha finally meets Frieza, and his confidence in the plan increases. As for the emperor, the last thing he expected that day was to encounter the man of his dreams promising him complete loyalty- but there are quite a few unanswered questions about this newcomer that leave him suspicious...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Three: A Beautiful Stranger

“He was found near the wreckage of his ship outside your army’s old fortress,” Kikono explained as he and his leader watched their ship’s decent toward a planet they hadn’t used in decades. “He tripped the security system when he approached it, so we sent down a few of our men to find out why anyone would be there. It seemed suspicious, but no one was expecting to find another Icejin.”

Frieza leaned back in his elevated chair, glaring out the window as the planet came closer and closer. “I assume his identity was verified?” 

“That’s the thing, my lord. He was carrying no identification of any form, so of course we did the usual scans, but there truly is no record of his existence. With as few Icejin as are left, it seems highly unlikely that there was one out there in space unregistered unless…”

“Unless what?” 

“…well, he states he lived with others of his race up until an attack from the Saiyans wiped the rest of them out, and he’s been wandering space ever since. If this is true, it would suggest that the legendary lost tribe may not only have indeed been real, but he’s the last living member of it.” 

“Interesting… you know, I had something of an interest in that particular legend in my youth, how strange that I may now be coming close to finding the full reality of it… assuming what our men was told was the truth. I have one more question for you, Kikono. I’m sure you checked his battle power?” 

“Yes, Lord Frieza. In fact it was the first thing we did, and may be the most surprising part of this- it measures roughly equal to that of your own third form.” 

“Surprising indeed… that such a powerful being could have been out there all this time escaping our notice… that fact alone is both nearly enough to verify his story and immensely suspicious, but I’ll withhold full judgement until I’ve met him personally.” 

\- - - 

On the planet, Yamcha looked up at the ship that he could feel contained a power so cold and immense that it could only be Frieza, and closed his eyes, taking a moment to pull his quickly fraying nerves back together. This was it… everything depended on this first impression, he couldn’t afford to mess it up.

The security team member that had initially found him and contacted Frieza spoke up, “Well, as you asked, he’s here. If you really do want to join his force I’m sure he’ll be happy to have someone as strong as you are on board, but take my advice, show him total loyalty and respect or else, well… I’m sure I don’t have to say anything more.” 

The former human just nodded. 

\- - - 

Once the ship landed, Frieza stepped out, flanked by a few members of his guard more for appearance’s sake than anything else- if this new recruit was as strong as they said then Frieza himself was the only one present who’d be able to take him in a fight. This didn’t concern the emperor however, even without Golden it would be a simple matter for him to beat this being. 

Walking toward him he finally got a look at this previously unknown member of his race and was quietly irked to see how much taller he was than himself and for the hundredth time wished he’d been able to go through with his plan for a little more height. But as they grew closer, he noticed something else- 

“Oh…” he muttered to himself, his eyes sweeping the newcomer from head to toe. He was, quite simply, gorgeous. The momentary distraction of this led to an awkward pause once they were finally standing in front of each other, but the taller man quickly knelt down in front of him. 

“Lord Frieza, it’s such an honor to meet you at last!” Yamcha spoke. The funny thing was, now that they were face to face a lot of his anxieties were lifting. For one, well, he’d seen the briefest flash of something in the emperor’s face when they’d first looked at each other. Frieza hid it quick, but it was a look Yamcha knew well- one that he himself often wore when he ran into pretty ladies. It seemed Vegeta had been right about his former boss’s type. 

For another? While he’d long known Frieza wasn’t exactly gifted in the height department, maybe it was because this was the first time he’d stood this close to him, or maybe it was because he was a little bigger than usual himself in his temporary body, but either way, the tyrant looked so tiny he seemed more adorable than intimidating. 

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, he’d taken care to suppress his energy by quite a bit. While he still had no idea how he’d stand against a fully powered up Golden Frieza, especially with his somewhat rusty fighting skills, the very fact that he’d be able to take the emperor by surprise if it did come down to combat gave him a lot more confidence. 

Frieza recovered from his momentary distraction and said, “Of course. This is a rare moment for myself as well, to just happen to stumble across someone of your strength that had escaped my army’s notice for so long. Obviously you know who I am, but yourself?” 

“My name is Yamcha, I was the prince of my people before a Saiyan wiped them out years ago,” He figured using his real name was safer than having to remember a lie, and the title? Well, if he’s inventing a backstory for himself, it might as well be an impressive one! But now it was time to really sell it. He assumed Frieza would want him to be bloodthirsty… “Once I learned that there were more of my race still out there in the galaxy, and that the strongest of us all was not only currently ruling all of space, but had also massacred the Saiyans? I knew I had to find you and pledge myself to your cause. So please accept my full loyalty and devotion, Lord Frieza.” He gently took the emperor’s hand in his own much larger ones and lightly kissed the back of it. 

An excessively formal and even a bit antiquated way of showing respect, Frieza thought, but a charming one, especially from someone so attractive. “You may stand, Prince Yamcha. I’d be happy to have a warrior of your raw power under my command, so I will accept your offer of loyalty. You’ll find that those who prove themselves useful to me are very well rewarded… but anything other than complete obedience is not tolerated.”

“Thank you, Lord Frieza,” Yamcha bowed, then picked up a large, carefully wrapped package from the ground. “I wanted to offer you a gift to thank you for accepting me into your forces. It’s the last remaining treasure of my people, passed down for generations through my family.” He removed the fabric that had been wrapped around it, revealing-

“My goodness… the King’s Statue.” 

Yamcha watched with a little smile as a wide eyed Frieza took the gift, carefully turning it over and running his fingers over the intricate carved details of a regal looking Icejin. The emperor’s staff glanced at each other, surprised by their ruler’s awed reaction to this seemingly basic old stone carving. 

“I accept this gift with gratitude,” Frieza finally said. “I expect great things from you, Prince Yamcha. This meeting certainly feels like it will lead to an excellent working relationship.” 

“I would like nothing more,” Yamcha replied. 

“For the moment, I’ll have you brought aboard my ship and given the usual assessments. Considering your unusual strength as well as our shared race I think I’d like to determine your placement in my army personally, so I will be reaching out to you for that purpose in due time.” With that Frieza returned to his ship, leaving his newest recruit in the care of his staff. 

“Shall I have that statue sent to one of your vaults, Lord Frieza?” Kikono asked. The emperor shook his head. 

“No, I think I’ll display it in my private quarters.” He headed there and, once alone, placed it in the center of a table and sat down, staring at it. 

It was funny… Frieza didn’t consider himself as someone to form sentimental attachments, and he never liked the idea of having to need anyone- it was part of why he’d worked so hard to match his great physical strength with undeniable political and financial power. He needed to be the best, and being the best meant everyone else was a stone to step on in order to stay at the top. 

…and yet… he used to sometimes daydream, just for the fun of it, of having someone… they’d have to be a person of great importance so he wouldn’t feel they were just using him for his own, someone strong enough to protect themselves if any of Frieza’s many enemies came after them, someone who had that rare trait of not completely boring the emperor after a minute in their company… 

It had been a long time since he’d indulged in such impractical fantasies, but the sort of partner he imagined back then wasn’t too dissimilar from the handsome lost prince he’d just met, particularly considering his old fascination with the very item he’d been gifted. 

The realities of life had made it obvious to Frieza that any sort of dream that involved placing trust or reliance on another being needed to stay a dream, but he was immensely curious about this Prince Yamcha. There was no harm in getting to know him a bit. 

But first… he placed a hand on the statue and loudly declared, “My greatest desire is to have the strength necessary to kill Son Goku and everything he cares about!” …after waiting a few moments he shook his head. “As I thought, just folklore.“ 

As the day wore on he found himself unable to focus on work, so after a bit he told his personal assistant to assure he was unbothered, as he was going to call it a night early. He paused to give one last look at the statue before climbing into bed and closing his eyes, relaxing and letting his mind wander. 

…and wander it did, right back to Prince Yamcha. He had so many questions he wanted to ask him- did he know any other survivors? What had he been doing for the years between the loss of his colony and joining Frieza? Where was he back when the emperor of space was young and foolish enough to have thought romance was a good option? 

He laughed at himself a little for that one, but he definitely could imagine another reality where he was less encumbered by duty and could enjoy such simple pleasures as ‘dating.’ 

Of course, there were other pleasures he could enjoy without risk… So Frieza thought about Yamcha’s large, strong hands as he slid one of his own between his legs. He vividly remembered how his lips had felt on his hand and imagined that same feeling on other parts of his body… It didn’t take long for those thoughts to further escalate, and soon a thoroughly relaxed Frieza was drifting off to sleep with a smile on his face. 

\- - - 

“Geez I’m glad that’s over…” After what felt like hours of paperwork, assorted scans and testing, and general questioning Yamcha was an official member of the Frieza force, his final placement still pending. Throughout the process he kept leaning on two lies- any time they needed information (like his birthdate as measured in some sort of space calendar) he’d use “I’m sorry, my culture was pretty isolated so I don’t really know.” Whenever they needed any sort of physical item, like identifying documents? “Almost everything I had was destroyed in my ship’s crash landing, including that!” 

The only part of the testing he enjoyed was the very brief combat trial- he was able to defeat several of Frieza’s so called elites with ease. 

And now? He was on a planet- he had no idea which one or where- that featured another of Frieza’s bases. He’d been given a room in the barracks there as temporary accommodations until it was determined how he’d best be utilized. Since the emperor himself would apparently be making that decision, he figured it would be another good opportunity to work on charming him. 

Weird how quickly the plan had gone from seeming completely ridiculous to completely workable. The fact that Frieza theoretically accepted the story helped.

He pulled out a small bag he’d been given- they provided him with some basic toiletries thanks to his claim of his possessions being mostly destroyed. It also included a scouter. He of course remembered seeing the Saiyans and such using them, but was too embarrassed to admit he had no idea how to read whatever space language it displayed text in. 

As he got himself ready for bed he looked in the small mirror over the sink. He didn’t know if he’d ever be used to seeing this body in his reflection… As he stared, he wondered what it was about this that was so attractive to Frieza. The body was definitely fun to play with though… he raised his tail so he could stroke the end of it thoughtfully. 

With a sigh he turned to head back out of the bathroom but despite having acknowledged this very feature moments prior he still forgot to straighten his tail back out behind himself and tripped again. “Ugh… and I’d been doing so good on not doing that.” He had planned to go straight to sleep but instead begrudgingly spent a half hour or so practicing his dancing. The videos had of course been destroyed along with the rest of his ship to obscure his real home planet, but he’d memorized the lessons over the course of the space flight. He counted the steps out loud as he waltzed with an imaginary partner through the room. Bulma had been right that this would help him feel more at home in his new form, even if the tail continued to be a hassle. 

The next morning he woke up, checked the scouter for any alerts- there were none- and pulled on the armor he’d been issued and headed down the hallway toward the mess hall for breakfast. There was a lot of staring from the other troops in the room, whether it was because of his race or the fact that he was a new face Yamcha wasn’t really sure. Thankfully as a sports star he knew how to handle a crowd, and pulled his shoulders back for a confident walk to the back of the food line. 

When he finally reached the front he stared at the dubious options awaiting him. Despite being fairly well versed in the culinary arts Yamcha had literally no idea what any of the available food was. Apparently his pause frustrated the burly alien in line behind him, as he gave him a shove and said “hurry it up, I haven’t got all day.” 

Rolling his eyes, he replied, “I’m working on it, buddy.” After pointing to a few things that he hoped would taste decent he went to sit down at an empty table, but a moment later he was joined by the same guy from the line, and he looked pissed. 

“So you’re new here, eh?” He asked. 

“I’d say that much is obvious.” 

“Well listen, new guy. My name is Cake and around these barracks what I say goes, got it? You seem pretty meek, so I highly suggest staying out of my way. Now how are you gonna apologize for holding up the line for ages and delaying my meal earlier?” 

“I’d hardly call taking ten seconds to decide what I wanted as something worth getting this irritated over,” Yamcha replied, picking up his utensils- they seemed a little like chopsticks?- and poking a bit at the food. He could feel that this Cake guy wasn’t anything special strength wise, but he still wanted to avoid a confrontation. His plan was going too well to start causing trouble now! 

Unfortunately his aggressor wasn’t backing down. “This disrespect has gotta stop! What’s your name, asshole?” 

Yamcha ignored him, taking a tentative bite of one of the less gross looking items on his tray. It was bland but not disgusting. Cake lost his remaining patience and jumped up, grabbing the tray away from him and tossing it across the room. All eyes were now on them. “You’re gonna regret this!” He jumped over the table and attempted to kick Yamcha in the face in the process, but of course between years of practice and their difference in strength the former human was able to catch his foot before it connected and twist him around, pinning him against the table. 

“I’m not here to start fights, but if you’re gonna try and pick one with me, then I’m happy to end it,” Yamcha said. Around the room he could here the ‘beep’ of scouters being pointed at him and his power level being read. Well, so much for keeping a low profile… He let go of Cake, who quickly straightened back up and pointed at the newcomer. 

“If you’re hoping I’ll forget about this-“ 

“Stand down, General.” Hearing that unmistakable voice the room once again went quiet. Frieza had at some point entered, and stood in the door with his arms crossed. He ignored the attention and approached his new recruit. Cake, stammering apologies, backed off. “Good morning, Prince Yamcha. If you’re done with your meal I feel this would be a good time to determine your placement in my forces.” 

“Oh, well…” he glanced at what remained of his meal, but wasn’t exactly feeling an appetite for it. 

Frieza noticed the spilled food as well, shot a glare at Cake, and sighed. “Come with me, Prince. I’ll make sure you receive something more appropriate to eat.” 

As the two men left together, Yamcha ignored the whispers in the room behind him and instead focused on the task at hand. This was it- another chance to win Frieza over! He hoped he was ready…

End Chapter Three: A Beautiful Stranger

Author’s note: I’m no good at OCs which is why I recycle Cake whenever I need a random jerk in Frieza’s army. Don’t worry, that’s the last you’ll see of him for this fic at least. More importantly, Yamcha has made a positive first impression on Frieza! But of course the emperor is no idiot even around a pretty face… Next chapter things get a little more complex between the two. I hope you’ll read it!

Obligatory plug for another of my Yamza fics time- if you are a fan of the ‘wish gone wrong’ angle that starts this one off, check out my fic Watch Your Wording! It’s been pretty well received and in my opinion at least is pretty funny. And obligatory begging for attention time- comments and kudos fuel my narcism. If you tell me you read it, love it or hate it, it makes my day!


	4. I Want You To Want Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The attraction between them truly becomes mutual...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Four: I Want You To Want Me

When Frieza woke up that morning, the first thing he did was take another look at the statue. Today he’d be figuring out where in his forces Prince Yamcha would best be utilized. Considering his battle power it seemed a given that he should be a soldier, but that didn’t change his plan to meet with him that day. After all, he couldn’t help but be exceedingly curious about this handsome lost prince. 

Looking over the results of the assessments that had been done the prior day a few things stood out. The combat trials suggested he had the skills needed to properly use his natural abilities, unsurprisingly. Mental assessments showed his education was lacking, particularly in terms of mathematics and technology, but his basic intelligence was strong and he seemed to be a fast learner, so that could be fixed. He also showed incredibly creative problem solving skills- as one of the notes added to the margins of the report noted, he didn’t just think outside the box, he thought like boxes didn’t even exist.

The personality tests also yielded interesting findings. He’d scored high in loyalty- always an important attribute as long as that loyalty is directed toward Frieza- but also naiveness. Furthermore, the testers had noted that Yamcha’s answers were often evasive, which could indicate he’s suspicious and closely guards himself… or that he’s lying. 

Well, Frieza would be able to determine that for himself soon enough. He called his personal assistant and requested he procure a proper protective display case for the statue, then had his ship brought down from orbit and onto the planet his newest recruit had spent the night on. 

\- - - 

As the two Icejin boarded Frieza’s ship, Yamcha thought things over. Today was critical- he had to make a big impression on Frieza or else he might get assigned to some distant post and lose his access to the tyrant. So be broke the silence as they headed into what seemed to be some sort of office. “I apologize for what you had to see a few minutes ago. I’m not sure what that guy’s problem was honestly-“ 

“No apologies are necessary, Prince,” Frieza replied. “I was impressed. You were threatened and efficiently neutralized that threat. Self defense is an important skill.” He gestured to a seat on one side of a table in the center of the office. “You may sit.” 

Yamcha was relieved that the morning’s events hadn’t hurt the smaller man’s opinion of him! Before sitting himself, he quickly crossed to the other side of the table and pulled out Frieza’s chair for him. 

This action didn’t go unnoticed, and Frieza smiled a little as he sat down. As Yamcha sat across from him, the emperor stole another lingering look over his body. Gorgeous and at least playing the part of being fully devoted to his lord? Oh, he liked this man. “Now, the purpose of this meeting is so I can place you in the role in which your abilities would be best utilized within my forces, but it’s not anything formal like the aptitude tests you were administered yesterday. It’s simply an opportunity to get to know each other.” 

Nodding, the former human leaned forward a bit. That was exactly what he wanted! Time to start laying it on thick… “It’s an honor to get to share a conversation with you, Lord Frieza! I’ll admit to being more than a little bit fascinated with you.” 

“Really now? Then I suppose I’ll admit that the feeling is mutual. I’m exceedingly curious how someone such as yourself escaped the notice of my empire for so long, amongst other things. But my first question for you is this- I’d like more details in regards to what made you decide you wanted to join me, and why now?” 

Yamcha knew he was a bad liar. With that in mind he’d planned to be honest wherever he could, or to at least pair the story to reality when possible, to avoid having to remember too many details. Still, the confidence he had felt after their prior meeting was waining a bit. Frieza’s stare was so intense, so unnerving… those vivid red eyes seemed like they could look right through someone. In fact, he could feel his heart rate starting to increase. Hoping he somehow still looked calm, he forced what he hoped was a charming smile and replied. 

“Well, the Saiyans hurt some people I really cared about, and it’s only recently that I became strong enough to feel like I could make any difference by working with you.” 

The statement, of course, wasn’t a lie, but it was open to interpretation, and without full context Frieza took it at face value. “Of course, you mentioned they wiped out the rest of your people. How did you survive? And what was it that you did for the years after that?” 

Once again careful word choice allowed Yamcha to avoid outright lying. “I was a lot weaker then. One of the Saiyans, he made these things he called ‘Saibamen,’ and one of them got me pretty bad. I was left alone because, well, no one would have guessed I’d ever be back on my feet after that…” That said, he jumped back a bit further in his personal history for the next part. “I was alone a long time. I survived by becoming a bandit, and I guess that was when I learned I could fight, and started striving to become stronger. I had a lot of adventures over the years. But it was only recently that I learned the real history of the lost tribe, that ‘Icejins’ were your race.” 

There was a knock at the door, and Frieza stood. “You may enter.” In came a plainly dressed alien of some unknown species pushing a cart covered in plates of food that at least smelled a bit better than what Yamcha had sampled earlier that morning. The server bowed and left. 

“Help yourself to whatever you’d like, Prince,” Frieza offered, and watched the taller man hesitantly look over the options. “What the rest of my forces were being served in the mess haul is highly processed fare intended to meet the nutritional needs of as many races as possible. It’s an efficient way to feed an army, but hardly enjoyable to consume.” 

“Are you going to have anything, my lord?” He asked. 

“I suppose I will…” A moment later they both had their choices. Frieza watched for a moment as Yamcha poked at his, carefully took a bite, and chewed it for an excessive amount of time. 

For such a common breakfast food Yamcha was certainly treating it like a novelty- maybe his new recruit was more sheltered than he had initially realized? It was kind of cute. But when he finally swallowed Frieza’s eyes got lost on his neck. Damn… if the emperor was ever asked to describe exactly what his idea of ‘gorgeous’ looked like, well, he had the perfect illustration right in front of him. 

For the second time Frieza wished he’d met this beautiful man back when he was foolish enough to think romance was a valid possibility for himself. But oh well! He took a bite of his own food, and after clearing his mouth, he asked, “So you decided to join me because I killed most of the Saiyans?” 

“Well, that was part of it.” Yamcha replied. Complements had been mentioned as one of his strengths, so… “But the more I heard about you, the more interested I became.” 

“Oh? And what sorts of things have you heard?” Frieza asked. The little smile on his face was encouraging, so Yamcha pushed it. 

“Well, that you’re the strongest being in the universe, for one. And how you’re as cunning as you are powerful.” 

“I see. What else?” Frieza asked. 

Yamcha wasn’t sure what else to say so he desperately cast around for ideas. He’s supposed to be hitting him in the heart, so… Maybe Frieza’s looks? Looking the emperor over once again, he focused on his face. “A lot of things. But I wasn’t prepared for the reality of seeing you in person… No one warned me about how stunning your eyes were.” It wasn’t a lie, between their vivid color and the way they seemed to look right through him- not to mention the dark edges that gave the impression of perfectly applied eyeliner. They actually were quite pretty. 

The compliment had the desired effect- Frieza was used to flattery of course as he received it constantly from those who were trying to stay in his good graces, but hearing something like that from someone like this pleased him far more than it probably should. He leaned across the table a bit, smiling a bit more at his dining companion. “Is that so?” 

Encouraged, Yamcha kept going. It was surprisingly easy to find more things to sincerely mention- was he able to find appealing features on Frieza because they were now the same race? Or was it… 

Was Frieza actually gorgeous? 

This surprising realization made Yamcha really, really nervous. How had he not previously seen this? Trying not to let his old phobia of pretty ladies resurface itself as a new phobia of beautiful aliens, he tried to continue the compliments, listing off each equally unnerving discovery as he continued looking the emperor over. “It’s not just your eyes. Your lips are incredible. And your-“ he almost choked and had the terrible feeling that he was likely blushing quite hard, but he kept going, “-your body. I’d heard it was powerful, but I guess I wasn’t expecting it to be so nicely shaped.” 

It took all of Frieza’s considerable willpower not to be blushing himself at this point. Hearing all of this from a being that appealed to him on nearly every level shook his usual calm. Especially since, between what he was saying, and more importantly how he was acting, either Yamcha was a much better actor than the aptitude testing had suggested, or the attraction between the men was very much mutual. It couldn’t hurt to flirt back a little. “We have quite a bit in common, don’t we? I’m certainly not the only powerful and appealing man at this table.” 

Yamcha laughed awkwardly, still blushing. He had known from the start that Frieza liked his looks, but strangely, hearing him state the compliment out loud was actually helping him calm himself down and refocus a bit. Yes, the emperor was downright sexy, but the former human was here for a reason, and hey, mutual interest would just make it easier to win him over. But he’d paused too long, and Frieza had changed the subject. 

“There’s something else I’d been wondering about, my dear Prince,” he leaned forward again, lowering his voice slightly. “Your transformations. I want to see them.” 

“Transformations?” Oh shit. Since he’d never personally seen them, he’d almost forgotten that Frieza transformed. Was this a common thing that would cast doubt on his being an Icejin since he couldn’t do it? 

“Yes. There’s no need to be shy about it, if you’re going to be working for me I’d like to have a full understanding of your capabilities and limits.” Not to mention simple curiosity as to how else someone this handsome could possibly look!

Yamcha tried to deflect it back at him. “I’ve heard mention of your various forms. I’d like to see yours too!” 

“There’s three of them you’re currently stronger than or equal to, and I’m afraid my need for self preservation means you’ll never being seeing them. I can’t allow myself into a position that puts me at a disadvantage after all.” 

“I wouldn’t dream of trying anything!” The former human lied, “I pledged my devotion to you, remember?” 

“Yes, but if I’d trusted such words every time I heard them I’d be long dead by now,” Frieza replied with a shrug. If anything, their chemistry made him even more suspicious of Yamcha- the phrase ‘if he seems too good to be true he probably is’ certainly seemed applicable here. But he did want to show off… “I see no harm in allowing you to see one of them, however.” 

He stood, and the other man did the same. The emperor then closed his eyes, stretched out his arms, and a dazzling light momentarily blinded Yamcha. As he regained his vision, his senses were momentarily overwhelmed by the force of Frieza’s powered up Ki. “Whoa…” He took a few steps closer, staring. The other man’s previously pale skin was now a radiant gold, and the shape of his body had changed a bit. He looked different, yet still absolutely heavenly. “You’re amazing, Lord Frieza!”

Frieza smiled and held his pose as the taller Icejin slowly circled him, appreciating the open admiration. Having made his point he returned to his prior form and turned back toward Yamcha. 

…they were standing very close. 

The former human wasn’t really sure if it was his genuine attraction to Frieza or his attempt to romance him for the plan’s sake that was guiding him at this point. If he was being honest with himself he didn’t really want to worry about it. He reached out and gently placed his hands on the emperor’s broad shoulders. “You are more than all the stories I’ve heard could ever have prepared me for.” 

Frieza felt his heart pound and was, for once, at a loss for words. Almost subconsciously he stepped forward and leaned his head back. Yamcha leaned down, closed his eyes, and for the sweetest and briefest of moments their lips started to touch-

Frieza wanted it so bad that he had no choice but to end it. He pulled away, holding a hand up between them and quickly saying. “Do not think it’s permissible to be so familiar with me at this point, Prince.”

Yamcha stepped back as well. “Sorry, sorry, I… I got caught up in the moment I guess. Forgive me?” He quickly bowed, embarrassed. 

“As long as you keep yourself in check from here forward,” the emperor replied. “I don’t want you getting the wrong idea. My interest in you is purely professional. I… don’t date. The other demands on my time are far too important to allow such distractions.” 

“U-understood.” 

“Anyway, I think this has given me more than enough to work with. You may depart the ship and return to the barracks for the rest of the day and you’ll be contacted on your scouter once I’ve made the decision on your placement.” Still embarrassed about what had just happened, Frieza turned and walked to the other side of the room as he finished the sentence. 

“Yes sir…” Yamcha took a few steps toward the door, equally embarrassed. “Um, before I leave…” 

“Yes?”

“I just wanted to let you know I still mean everything I’ve said. Even if I uh, acted a bit out of turn there, I really do hope to get a chance to serve you.” 

“Alright then.” After a moment of awkward silence Yamcha left. Frieza sat back down with a sigh. If he’d been a different man, in a different life, he’d had welcomed whatever could have followed that almost kiss with enthusiasm. But he didn’t have that luxury. It simply wasn’t an option for him to allow himself to believe in the sincerity of anyone’s motives, even if the person in question did seem to be the man of his dreams. 

But what to do with him? He still had to decide how to utilize this distracting but clearly useful asset. He’d make a fine soldier, there was no question about that. But despite having to push him back, Frieza couldn’t help but continue to be interested in this man on both a personal and professional level. Sending him out to fight in his army meant future opportunities to see him would be limited. 

Oh well, that was the price of having to make logically sound decisions sometimes. He left the office, calling a servant to clean up the remaining food on his way out, and returned to his own quarters. 

As he’d requested prior to leaving, his personal assistant had sourced a case for the statue and had it placed inside. Frieza took a good look at it- the simple glass box would protect the artifact from dust, at least, but hardly seemed nice enough for display of such a treasure. He’d have to find something else. 

He let his mind wander as he looked over the statue for what had to be the dozenth time since he’d received it. Of all the gifts he could have received… such an item of such rare significance to him personally. He’d once been so obsessed with it. What a luxury of time he’d had back then, and so many interests to pursue. Over the years he became increasingly singleminded about his position, and then about his revenge, to the loss of nearly all other possibilities. 

It had been a long time since anything outside of those two things had seemed worthwhile to him, but now? 

Maybe… 

\- - - 

After what had happened at breakfast Yamcha went straight to his temporary quarters, not wanting to draw any more trouble out in the barracks. Laying in bed after a minute of attempts at arranging his tail comfortably, he shut his eyes, not to sleep, but to think. Maybe he shouldn’t have kissed Frieza. Had pushing things that fast ruined his chances? In the moment it had felt like the right thing to do. 

It had felt so good too, even if it only lasted for less than a second. Those lips… 

Yamcha still wasn’t really sure if he’d be attracted to Frieza if he’d been back in his own human body or if his ability to see the alien as hot was a matter of being the same race, but it simultaneously both made this whole plan easier and more difficult. At least it would add authenticity to his attempts at flirting!

…assuming he got another chance that is.

He sighed. Maybe this whole plan was just dumb. Even if Frieza was into Yamcha it didn’t mean someone as guarded and smart as that was just gonna give him an opening! He was probably gonna get sent off to some random planet and never even see him again. Well, if that happened he’d just have to run off back home, wish his old body back, and chalk this all up as a loss-

A beeping startled him out of his thoughts, and he remembered his scouter. Digging it out of his bag he held it up to his face but the only text on the screen was in that language he couldn’t read. The beeping continued so he fumbled with it a bit, hitting a button on the side- the annoying noise finally stopped and he heard a certain smooth voice.

“Prince Yamcha.”

“Lord Frieza!” He hadn’t expected to hear back so fast!

“I’ve given things some thought and decided what job would best allow your particular skillset to be utilized to it’s fullest.”

“Whatever it is I’m honored to be considered.” 

“It just so happens my former personal assistant had to be relieved of duty today. As this isn’t a position I can afford to leave vacant for long, and as it requires someone with a diverse skillset, I’d like to see how well you do in this role.” 

“Really?” This was the exact opposite of what he expected after his mistake earlier- but it was exactly what he needed to keep his plan moving forward. “Lord Frieza, I would love nothing more than the opportunity to prove my worth and loyalty by working directly with you like that!” 

“I’m delighted to hear it,” the emperor replied. “I’ll have a few things delivered to you within the hour to help you prepare, then I expect to see you first thing tomorrow morning to formally get started. You won’t disappoint me, right, Prince?” 

“I’ll give this my all. Thank you once again for this honor!” 

End Chapter Four: I Want You To Want Me

Author’s note: Well that escalated and then de-escalated quickly. 

Insert me begging for comments and kudos here. It means a lot to me that people read my stuff, especially when I write such a rare pair.


	5. Little By Little

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamcha has his first assignment as Frieza's assistant... and gets a powerful reminder of what is at stake here. Meanwhile, Frieza has suspicions.

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

This chapter's GORGEOUS illustration is once again from the amazing [pen.lilixeesketche](https://www.instagram.com/pen.lilixeesketche/)! It's an honor! 

Chapter Five: Little by Little

“I made sure instructions for setting your scouter up for secure communication with my own were delivered along with the rest of the items I had sent to you… No matter, I’ll do it myself.” Frieza took Yamcha’s scouter from him and put it on, tinkering with the buttons. Yamcha was embarrassed- he didn’t exactly want to admit he was illiterate in whatever alphabet Frieza’s force used, so he’d vaporized the paper he’d been sent with a little blast of Ki and just pretended he didn’t receive it. The other things he’d been sent were thankfully easier to figure out- several sets of considerably nicer armor (including an overdramatic cape that he absolutely loved), what seemed like a messenger bag containing some sort of tablet computer, and documents that based on the fact that they included his photo he correctly assumed were ID cards. 

“There. We now have a dedicated private channel,” Frieza handed the device back to his new assistant. “When I need to contact you, or vice versa, it will be done through that line to guarantee proper discretion.”

“Yes sir!” Yamcha quickly put it on. “So what exactly will you need me to do? I’m excited to get started.” 

Frieza paused for a moment, looking the taller Icejin over. He looked spectacular in his new uniform, unsurprisingly. The emperor was pleased with himself for thinking up this compromise- by making the prince his assistant, he’d be able to enjoy his looks and have plenty of opportunities to learn more about this fascinating man while also keeping a professional line between the two of them, something that the prior day had made abundantly clear would be necessary. Furthermore, keeping such a strong yet mildly suspicious asset close to himself until he’d determined the veracity of his his loyalty seemed wise. “Essentially, your purpose will be to do whatever I ask. The duties of the job will vary depending on what I need of you. I might send you on errands, or have you accompany me to meetings, or handle minutiae of running my staff so that my own time is free for more important matters. In the past I’ve also had my personal assistant serve as a pilot from time to time, but considering your own recent crash-”

“Hey, that wasn’t on me, that ship was barely operational to begin with, it couldn’t withstand the pressures of reentering the atmosphere and went up in flames without any faults in my flying!” 

“Well, perhaps at some point I’ll give you a chance to prove this, but for now I stand by my prior decision. Otherwise, do you feel ready to perform the sorts of duties I just described?” 

Actually, Yamcha was relieved. “Oh, I’m totally qualified there, I’m gonna be great at this!” 

“You seem confident. Have you done something similar before?” 

Once again Yamcha’s own actual past worked to fill in the details. “Well, for a period of time I stayed with a family of rich scientist inventor types. I helped their daughter with a lot of the same sort of stuff. Plus any sort of physical labor she needed, and acted as her bodyguard, and gave her massages when she needed help relaxing, and listened when she wanted to rant about things, and acted as her emotional support, and well, pretty much everything.” 

“Oho ho, it seems my decision was wiser than even I had realized!” Frieza laughed. “I’ll set my expectations for you quite high then.” 

“And I will do everything I can to live up to them! You won’t regret this!” 

“Such enthusiasm is refreshing. Are you ready for your first assignment then?” 

“Heck yeah, I was born ready!” 

He was almost too cute. That excited response was so novel compared to the usual overly controlled, overly professional, mildly terrified replies he’d get from most of his staff. Frieza couldn’t stop himself from smiling as he explained, “Since you’ve heard so much about me you’re doubtless aware I’m in the planet brokering business. I have a potential client that has requested a meeting. However, I have reason to believe they are not genuine considering their ties to certain groups who have been displaced by my empire’s work in the past. As such, having some extra muscle with me would be a fantastic deterrent against anything unwelcome that they could be attempting.” 

“While I’d be honored to accompany you for this, considering your own strength do you really think they’d try and attack you, or that I’d be any sort of obstacle?” Yamcha asked. While when he’d initially met Frieza two days ago he’d felt confident that if he stopped hiding his full power he’d be as strong as the tyrant was, after having seen his beautiful and terrifying Golden form he’d lost that certainty. “You’re a lot stronger than I am.” 

“Yes, but you yourself are far stronger than all but the true outliers such as myself. If it came down to it I would of course defend myself with ease, but for appearance’s sake I’d rather save my own fighting for when I’m trying to make an example of someone rather than for just fending off a few low level troublemakers. As I’m sure you can imagine, my actions come under considerable scrutiny… such is the price of being famous for power. So I must be careful to send the right message. Carefully chosen battles keep the proper level of fear, while beating up just anyone willy nilly does little more than make me look barbaric.” Honestly, Frieza disliked this aspect of his life- he wished sometimes he could live without having to consider the gravity of any one action. In some ways the murders he’d commit in a rage were a relief- those moments of not worrying about control were so refreshing. “Furthermore, having powerful subordinates serves to highlight the overall strength of my entire organization. It shows that threat of the Frieza Force isn’t just in its leader.” 

“You’ve got it! Let’s go show them that we mean business then!”

\- - -

As the two men prepared to depart the main ship several hours later they were both getting a change of clothes. “You seem surprised,” Frieza observed as Yamcha looked over the newly delivered additions to his wardrobe. “Part of success in the world of intergalactic business is dressing in whatever is considered an appropriate manner for the specific culture you’re working with, so get used to seeing a variety of odd clothing.” 

“Actually, if I’m surprised it’s just because I’ve worn something kinda similar to this before,” the faux Icejin replied. Indeed, the outfits they were donning were essentially kimonos, although in a heavy, soft fabric that he was unfamiliar with. His was primarily a rich navy blue color, and Frieza’s was a light purple with elaborate golden embroidery. Despite having worn kimonos on a handful of occasions on Earth though he had to get help with tying the sash and arranging the fabric to accommodate his tail. Thankfully the same tailor who brought the outfits in was able to demonstrate. 

“Take what you’re learning to heart, Prince Yamcha,” Frieza warned as he watched. “Generally I expect my personal assistant to help dress me.” 

Now, as they headed into a small craft that would take them into the waiting ship of the group they were to be meeting with, Yamcha took a few admiring glances at his boss. It was a fantastic look for him, but he got the impression that Frieza would probably look good in just about anything. The man in question looked up and noticed his subordinate’s eyes on him. “Is there something you needed to say, prince?” 

For a moment he considered replying honestly, but after being cautioned about being overly familiar he wasn’t sure how best to proceed with the flirting… so he tried to find something else. “Oh uh, just, uh, this ship the meeting is going to be on looks massive! I’ve never seen one like that!” 

Frieza glanced down at the radar display, which showed his own moderately sized main ship behind them, the tiny shuttle they were currently using, and the distant yet dramatically larger craft they were headed toward. “It appears to be a Spacemaster class vessel, they’re large cargo ships that are occasionally refitted as temporary accommodations for living beings- you can fit an entire society on one. As such I encounter them from time to time in my line of work. They’re a popular choice for rehoming groups on the planets they purchase from us.” 

“Wow…” It was funny these things that seemed so impressive to the faux human were so mundane to the emperor… The sheer depth of experiences and knowledge that Frieza must have accumulated over his life… Yamcha was more awed by that than even the engineering marvel they were headed toward. 

Settled in for what would likely be an hour or two’s worth of travel, Frieza turned toward his taller companion. “When we last had an opportunity to speak privately, we skirted a topic that I’m still very much curious about.” 

Guard fully back up, Yamcha attempted to hide his nervousness as he replied, “Is that so?” 

“Yes. I’d still like to see your other forms. Is this your true form, or something hiding greater power? You’ll show me everything.” 

For all Yamcha knew maybe he could transform, but how to trigger it, as well as what direction he’d go in- these were complete mysteries to the former human. But Frieza was staring at him so expectantly, he had to say something. “Those are great questions, but…” 

“But what, prince?” 

He couldn’t stall any longer, so honesty was all he could manage. “I really don’t know? I kinda forgot transforming was even a thing?” 

Frieza simply stared at Yamcha with those unreadable, piercing eyes for a moment, then leaned back in his chair. “I see.” He then busied himself with reading for the remaining duration of their trip. Soon enough their shuttle docked with the Spacemaster (which was even larger than even it’s massive radar shadow could have prepared Yamcha for). 

After formally greeting their potential buyer they were all seated in a large conference room. Frieza seemed fully calm and professional, so Yamcha left him to do the talking and instead focused on surveying the room. If keeping the emperor safe was part of his job, he should probably start there? 

Aside from the two dignitaries Frieza was currently discussing business with, there were four others in the room standing quietly to the sides. He assessed them as discretely as he could- all four were fairly buff, and he could feel they had the Ki to back it up. Security, most likely. His human body would have struggled in a fight with them, and definitely would had lost if all four took him on at once, but now? He almost hoped they would try something. 

Confident that they were safe, he returned his attention to Frieza. With as little as he’d known of the man before meeting him personally two days ago he’d assumed he’d be like an evil Goku, honestly. Focused on fighting, more brawn than brains but a genius in combat. He hadn’t been prepared for the calm, logical being that was now writing down numbers and breaking down payment options, performing lighting fast mental math to recalculate for various differing interest and exchange rates- he was smart. Probably Bulma tier smart. 

Definitely Bulma tier gorgeous, at least to Yamcha’s current eyes. The day’s attire drew attention to his upper chest and neck, and his slender waist was emphasized by the sash. He once again wondered if it was his Icejin body feeling an attraction to another member of the same race, or if he’d think Frieza was good looking once he was human again. Either way it sure was convenient. 

His eyes and mind may have been distracted but the rest of his body warned him of the trouble moments away as he felt rather than saw one of the dignitaries charging up energy under the table. Frieza, unaware, was describing one of his available planets- 

“Hey!” Yamcha grabbed the table and threw it across the room, knocking down two of the four body guards with it. There was a moment of chaos as the planned treachery across from the emperor was exposed, and the hired muscle that were still standing dashed forward. 

“D-die, Frieza!” The dignitary shouted, firing off the attack, but it was nothing special and Yamcha was able to quickly deflect it back at their aggressor, sending him flying. 

The emperor calmly stood, sighing. Yamcha focused on the fight, easily rendering the first of the other two attackers unconscious with a quick strike before spinning around and doing the same to the other. The remaining politician turned to flea, and Yamcha dashed after him- only to fall flat on his face. In the heat of combat his old reflexes were controlling him, and fighting like a human had caused him to neglect to consider the location of his tail. 

Frieza had watched the chaos with interest, more than satisfied with his new subordinate’s efforts to defend him. But there was something off about how he fought, a fact quickly driven home by his sudden fall. 

He’s not accounting for his tail? Odd. 

That strangeness (and the suspicion it brought up) aside, though, Prince Yamcha’s fighting style was a fascinating mix of brute strength, an almost feral intensity, and something oddly familiar that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was obvious his muscles alone weren’t what let him ace the combat trials prior to his employment. Still, he was going to have some questions, and he wasn’t going to like it if the prince didn’t give satisfactory answers. 

Yamcha was back on his feet almost immediately after his tumble and dived on the retreating dignitary, hauling him back to Frieza. The emperor simply shot a beam through his chest and that was the end of that. “Well, it seems this meeting has taken a turn for the worse. Shall we make our departure, my dear Prince?” 

“Yes sir…” 

Back in their own ship Yamcha tried to keep a straight face. Despite what their leaders had just attempted he still struggled to not let his conflicting emotions show as the final burning remains of their ship and everyone on it disintegrated from Frieza’s death ball. 

How many innocents had just died?

This was it. This was why he couldn’t get distracted by praise from a pretty face. 

This was why he needed to defeat Frieza. 

“Well, even knowing it was likely things would end on this note,” Frieza said lightly, “I do still feel that meeting was a productive use of our time, if only because it allowed me to see what you’re capable of… and it’s lead to a few questions.”

This was not a time he could answer whatever Frieza wanted to hear, he needed to deal with his anger first. “Whatever you say my Lord, but can I rest a little first? I…I haven’t had a proper fight in a bit and I haven’t been keeping up with my training like I should, I think I pulled something.” A lie wrapped in just enough truth, as was his usual for these last couple of days. “Can I lay down and stretch for a bit?” 

Frieza nodded. “A fair enough request. We’ll be back at my main ship in an hour or two, we’ll get you into a healing pod then. For the immediate you may lay down.” 

Back on the smaller ship, Yamcha quickly realized the error of his plan- there wasn’t really anywhere he could lay down except for… “Considering this particular craft is really only ever used for short trips like this there isn’t a proper bed, but you’re welcome to use the bench seating at the back.” So he couldn’t escape Frieza after all. Still too angry to be able to worry about being charming he did the only thing he could think of, and pretended to fall asleep the moment he hit the soft cushioned surface. 

On the other side of the room, Frieza typed up a quick report detailing the results of the failed dealings a moment ago. It was the sort of thing he would usually delegate to his personal assistant, but… he glanced over at the sleeping Yamcha. He’d let him rest, for now at least. 

The way he fought certainly proved he was from a different background and culture even if they were the same species. But the way his clearly well practiced moves seemed at odds with the features of his body… 

He’d asked twice now about potential transformations, and twice the answers had been evasive. Perhaps he had another form, one without the long tail, that he was more used to? But if so why hadn’t he answered when asked previously? 

Always on the lookout for betrayal, Frieza had already considered the possibility that Yamcha’s loyalty wasn’t genuine. As strong as he was currently Frieza easily outclassed him, but if this was only the first of a series of transformations…. 

He stood and quietly crossed the room, staring down at his subordinate. In his sleep the taller man was completely inelegant, laying on his stomach with one arm supporting his head and the other dangling off the side of the bench. 

It should be illegal to be that cute, Frieza thought, then immediately was irritated with himself for continuing to think that ‘cuteness’ was something worth admiring. 

Well… Maybe he was overthinking things? Maybe he really was just rusty in his fighting, and perhaps it was simple clumsiness that made him trip over his own tail? Well, he still planned to find out, but there was no rush. He’d leave the interrogation for when he had the time to do it properly. For now? He took one more lingering glance at how the fabric of the outfit he’d had his assistant dress in for that day was pulled over the muscles of his back and shoulders then returned to work. 

Yamcha awoke with a start (falling off the narrow bench seat in the process) when the small craft loudly docked with the main ship. He’d meant to just fake sleep, but he must have been more tired than he’d realized. 

Unable to stop himself from laughing a little, Frieza slipped his tail under the faux prince’s arms and pulled him to his feet. “You certainly looked comfortable, up until that last instant that is. We’ve returned, so I’ll have you shown the way to the medical bay-“ 

“Oh, no need! I’m feeling loads better, just needed to rest a bit!” 

“If you’re certain. There’s no shame in needing to make use of the healing pods.” 

“Positive. I’m not such a weakling that a few moments of action make me need a doctor thank you very much!” 

“Alright then, my dear prince. But I do insist you take the next few hours to rest a bit more. And starting tomorrow you should make use of the training facilities available on the ship. With how impressive you were today I’m adding ‘bodyguard’ to your job description, so I don’t want to hear any more about you being ‘rusty.’”

End Chapter Five: Little by Little

Author’s note: sorry guys, had to dial back the trust a bit here but next chapter, and the following one, things get more… intimate ;)

Large cargo ship that can also be reconfigured to haul people called a Spacemaster? If you guessed this was a tribute to the Globemaster, aka best airplane, congrats, you’re an aviation nerd with good taste in planes. I’m not some military nut or whatever, the opposite in fact, but being raised by an aircraft electrician planes are one of my pet interests. I’ll stop talking about them now. 

Time to plug another of my fics! Like Yamza, sexual situations, and twist endings? Then you should read my fic Stay A Little Longer! Time to beg for interaction- comments? Kudos? Anyone?


	6. When You Touch Me Like This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They spend an evening together. Yamcha realizes Frieza might not be a lost cause, and accidentally does something rather inappropriate to the emperor....

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Six: When You Touch Me Like This

The following days were hectic for the emperor of space. From the mundane but important- meetings, troop placement, paperwork- to the dramatic (yet another assassination attempt, an uprising on one of his planets, treachery from a member of his ship’s core staff) he hardly had a moment to himself. Sure, these were all regular occurrences, but to have them all happen within the space of a week? Exhausting. 

The bright one bright spot in this was a busy Frieza was one with a lot of excuses to make good use of his personal assistant. His handsome face never failed to improve the tyrant’s mood, and the more practice he had the better he became at his new position. Frieza knew he could be demanding, and patience was never his a skill he bothered to cultivate, but Yamcha handled his needs with a surprising quickness and attention to detail. 

If Frieza was born to rule, well, Yamcha was born to serve. They made a fantastic team. 

Unfortunately, with how full his schedule had been he hadn’t had an opportunity to have a proper discussion about anything but the tasks at hand with him since seeing him fight, and as such his suspicions remained. 

Anyone on his staff, with the rarest of exceptions such as perhaps Berryblue, had a limited period of usefulness. After all, no one sought out a spot in Frieza’s employ without their own motives, and eventually their own greed or cowardice or any other of a number of potential issues would make itself apparent. He knew that would happen eventually with Yamcha, too.

Such a shame… but he’d enjoy what time he could with him while it remained. 

For Yamcha, that week had been a constant culture shock as he settled in to his new home on Frieza’s ship. Everything was so strange, from the food to the constant immersion in alien customs and traditions. Between that and having to always remember to keep up his cover story, well, it was exhausting. 

At least his job provided some down time. His schedule was sporadic and unpredictable depending on when Frieza needed him, so he took advantage of the spaces between tasks to train (either in the ship’s gym or to practice dancing alone in his quarters) to increase his ease in his body. Despite his rough welcome to the emperor’s forces he managed to wind up surprisingly popular- maybe because everyone wanted to be in the good graces of someone who worked directly with their leader?- and he used this and some of his downtime to teach some of his coworkers how to play baseball. 

Considering once this plan hopefully succeeded he’d be returning home and needing a job again, well, he didn’t want to lose the skills that payed the bills!

That said, if he could figure out how to convert his very substantial paycheck from his current position into a currency Earth would accept he might not need to…

The biggest issue he faced was a lack of real headway on his plan. Frieza had made it obvious that he was extremely attracted to Yamcha physically, but that was it. And while he saw his boss several times a day it had always been for hectic work related tasks, nothing that would give him an opportunity to try and get closer to him. 

That changed at the end of their first week together. 

It had been a particularly busy day even by the standards the last week had set, and Frieza was alone in his bedroom, trying to relax so he could get a few hours of sleep before the following day’s demands. His mind and body were refusing to cooperate, however. He sighed, and got up, planning to pour himself a glass of wine… but he paused as he walked past the display case containing the statue. 

\- - - 

Yamcha had finally mastered the art of sleeping properly in his temporary body, taking the lessons he learned from his accidental bench nap and applying them to his bed. He’d gotten rid of the pillow, which caught on his horns during the night, and took to sleeping on his stomach to avoid having to find an optimal arrangement of his tail. He’d nearly nodded off when a loud beep from his scouter roused him. 

While he silenced it for most notifications during the night, his job required he be ready to assist Frieza at a moment’s notice at any time. Stifling a yawn he grabbed the device. “This is Yamcha, what can I do for you my Lord?” 

“My dear prince, please meet me in my quarters. I’m aware the hour is late, you don’t need to bother with your armor if you’ve already undressed.” 

“Be there in a sec then!” 

True to his word he arrived moments later. It was his first time in Frieza’s actual living quarters- they usually met in the emperor’s office. He knocked, and Frieza answered the door, smiling. “I appreciate your promptness. Come in.” Following him inside he noticed the statue prominently displayed in the center of the bedroom and smiled a bit himself. 

Frieza paused by the bed and crossed his arms. “As we’re both losing sleep I’ll get straight to the point. Considering the relative chaos of the last few days I’ve had difficulty properly relaxing myself in the evening. I’d like you to help me with this.” 

“R-really?!” Yamcha’s mind took a trip straight into the gutter. The smaller man noticed his expression, realized what he was likely thinking, and quickly covered his face with one hand to hide the burning in his cheeks. 

“Massage. You had mentioned you used that skill for the inventor you used to work with.” 

“Oh, of course, that.” Yamcha awkwardly tried to laugh it off. “Yeah, I’d be happy to give you one. But uh, one warning, I was never formally trained on it, I just kinda learned by doing, and your body is really different than hers was. So you gotta tell me what feels good, alright?” 

“I’ll be sure to make my preferences clear then,” the emperor replied, then he laid down on the bed. For the first time since their almost kiss Yamcha put his hands on his boss. Having an excuse to feel his body a bit, he allowed himself a little inappropriate thrill as he felt how his smooth skin felt under his hands, and the perfect taper from his broad shoulders down to his slender waist… 

How the hell did he ever NOT think Frieza was attractive? Not that a gorgeous body made up for an evil soul of course. That second thought didn’t stop his heart from racing a little as he continued to rub the tyrant’s body. 

It had been years since Frieza had allowed anyone to touch him like this. The intimacy was a little off-putting at first, but the gentle pressure of his attractive subordinate’s large hands was relaxing him as well as he’d hoped. As he slowly worked past his natural aversion to being touched he began to really enjoy it. Those hands… he could imagine them in working their magic on a few other key areas of his body… But he couldn’t allow himself to get too distracted by those thoughts. At least not until he was alone later. 

Right now he had a second motive aside from relaxation. “My dear prince… there are some things I’ve been curious about, but we haven’t had as many chances to chat as I’d have liked, considering how eventful the first few days of your employ have been.” 

“Is that so?” Yamcha asked, cringing as his voice went up a lot higher in pitch at the end of the sentence than it should have. Nerves had a way of doing that to him. 

“Indeed. Watching you fight so valiantly for me the other day- firstly, if my memory serves you weren’t wearing your scouter, correct?” 

“Well, no, I wasn’t. I mean, I really only use it for communicating with you and you were right there so…” 

“How is it, then, that you noticed one of our aggressors charging up an attack under the table?” 

“I felt it-“ he realized his error as the words came out of his mouth, and in a flash he remembered the Saiyan invaders being unable to do that same trick until Vegeta learned it later. 

“I had thought as much,” Frieza looked back over his shoulder, eyes narrowed. “It’s a rare skill. How exactly did you acquire it?”

“I learned it from the people I trained with?” It wasn’t meant to be a question but once again Yamcha’s nerves made his pitch jump yet again.

“How interesting. I have another question for you, my prince.” 

“I have nothing to hide, fire away!” Yamcha quickly replied. 

“The way you approach battle fascinates me. While it was clear that you were, in your own words, ‘rusty,’ it’s equally clear that you once were a very well trained fighter.”

“I mean, I guess so. I was initially self taught but I found some teachers that saw my potential over the years.” 

“And yet, neither you nor your mentors bothered to integrate one of your best assets into your moves?” 

Yamcha didn’t like where this was going, but tried to stay calm and continue the massage as casually as he could. “Not sure what you mean there, my lord.” 

“Your tail.” 

Fuck… despite all his efforts to get used to and move naturally in this body, the moment his old fighter’s instinct had kicked back in he’d been seen right through. Frieza hadn’t figured things out completely though. 

“When I asked you before you dodged the question. This time I demand full transparency. You have other forms, don’t you? How many? How strong can you become?” 

As usual, when lies failed Yamcha defaulted to a sort of twisted honesty. “I swear I didn’t even know about Icejin changing forms until I learned you did it!” 

Frieza stared at him a moment longer, assessing the little body language clues that would give away a liar, then sighed and relaxed again, lowering his head. Yamcha, hoping he’d been convincing, fished for a change of topic. 

Well, if the atmosphere was already awkward, he couldn’t make it worse. He still had some frustrations from the other day to work through after all. 

As he considered his wording, he realized he’d been unconsciously rubbing the other man’s body harder than he’d meant to as his anger rose back up. Bulma would have complained about this much pressure, but Frieza seemed to finally be relaxing his tense shoulders a bit. Interesting. 

“Lord Frieza… There was something I was wondering from that day too. Like, yeah, I totally get why you killed the assholes that attacked us, but was it really necessary to blow up the whole ship? Their entire population was on that thing!” 

“Considering the joy you took in the knowledge that I practically wiped out the Saiyans I’m shocked to see that you’re so soft,” Frieza replied, not even bothering to open his eyes. 

“That’s not it,” Of course it was, but he still had to play along for the plan. “They still needed a planet to live on, even if their leaders were shit. We still could have sold to them.” He waited there, pushing back the rising anger once again. So many innocent people dead… Frieza was unredeemable. But he still wanted to hear a justification. 

“I don’t like to leave loose ends,” he replied. “If some of their group wronged me, who’s to say the rest won’t do the same? Aside from creating an example, it’s simply a cautious and intelligent action in the name of self defense. No different than what I did to the Saiyans.” 

“I get it. Good call, my lord,” Yamcha replied, then took a moment to really think the response over. Like the Saiyans… he’d slaughtered them. And one of them had done the same thing to the very tribe the faux Icejin was pretending to be part of. It was strange… but somehow he almost felt relieved. Yes, he’d just gotten confirmation of what he already knew- Frieza was a selfish, cruel person. But he had gotten something else out of the conversation as well… A reminder that the person Frieza was now happened to be very similar to the person Vegeta once was. 

The Saiyan had seemed like an unrepentant villain once. And now? A hero and a family man. 

Maybe Frieza was a work in progress. A fate that could be changed. 

For the first time since seeing him commit mass murder Yamcha was able to clear his head a bit and refocus on the plan. He just couldn’t bring himself to try and win over someone that he couldn’t look at without feeling almost choked with anger, but now he saw two intriguing outcomes where before there had been one. 

He could get Frieza to fall for him, lower his guard, and then defeat the tyrant as the original idea had been. 

Or… he could get Frieza to fall for him, lower his guard… and become one of the good guys? 

Back on track after several days of uncertainty, Yamcha continued the massage with increased enthusiasm. “It’s an honor and a privilege to be able to touch you like this, honestly.”

While his suspicions remained, the emperor allowed himself to enjoy the moment a bit. He refused to trust anyone, so it was no surprise his gorgeous assistant was also likely hiding things from him. He’d force the truth out in due time. For now he melted into the feel of his hands. “Of course it is. You undersold your skills quite a bit though, my prince. This is proving to be most effective.”

Maybe it was because they’d been discussing tails earlier, but Yamcha’s fingers almost subconsciously found their way to the bend of the skin around the base of Frieza’s tail. He felt the smaller man draw a deep breath at that, so he continued applying more pressure in that area- but under him Frieza tensed up slightly. 

“Prince Yamcha, I thought I had warned you about acting overly familiar?” His voice sounded a little odd for whatever reason, but the former human didn’t know what he was getting at here, and just nodded. 

“You did.” Not sure what he was doing wrong he continued his work on Frieza’s lower back, including the aforementioned area that kept getting seemingly positive reactions from his boss. 

Under him, Frieza shut his eyes tight. That bold, classless… taking careful, deep breaths he decided he’d allow this, but he’d stop Yamcha if he touched anywhere else he shouldn’t. He’d be annoyed at himself for being so weak to this pretty face if it didn’t feel so damn good. After a few more minutes it was too much and he caught himself just as he started to moan. 

“Mm-! Okay, that’s enough for tonight. You may leave.”

“Oh, alright! Sleep well, Lord Frieza. Call me back in any time and I’d be happy to help relax you!” 

\- - - 

Half an hour later Yamcha flopped backwards on his bed, breathing heavily. “Holy shit…” He moved his right hand away from his crotch and his left from that area around the base of his tail. “So THAT’S why he warned me about being too familiar. I can not believe I was just casually rubbing one of his erogenous zones!” 

Across the ship Frieza was in a similar state. “Acting so innocent while he touched me like that,” he muttered as he stood up from his bed and headed into his bathroom to clean up. “If he wasn’t so damnably good looking I’d have killed him for it.” Instead he neatly filed away that particularly intimate moment for future use. 

End Chapter 6: When You Touch Me Like This

Author’s note: 

Sometimes I worry I push the rating too much, hopefully it’s fine to reference these things without getting explicit. 

Time to plug another fic- imagine if, throughout the entirety of Dragon Ball Z and much of Super, Yamcha and Frieza had been in contact… without realizing the mysterious voice they were developing feelings for was on the opposite side of their conflict? This is Half a World Away, a collaboration between myself (the plot and editing) and the eternally talented SkinsT (the actual writing). Possibly one of the best Yamza fics on the internet, if I do say so myself!

Time to say please give me feedback? I don’t trust the view counter to be actual humans reading the fic and not bots clicking links, but kudos or comments (even if the comment is just “I can’t believe I wasted part of my life reading this” ) motivate me through the slog of editing this fic and getting it posted!

Next chapter includes a cameo appearance by one of my other favorite couples, one that I know quite a few Yamza fans like as well. I hope you’ll keep reading!


	7. To Socialize

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two unexpected guests give Frieza new reason to doubt Yamcha's sincerity... but it's hard to think about that once they're dancing together...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

This chapter has been blessed with gorgeous illustrations by the one and only [pen.lilixeesketche](https://www.instagram.com/pen.lilixeesketche/)! Thank you so much!

Chapter 7: To Socialize

The following days were slightly calmer, with less excitement and more time spent actually acting like a ruler and his assistant. Seeing Frieza as a potential ally had fully reinvigorated Yamcha’s interest in his plan, and he worked harder than ever to charm him. As for the emperor, he was able to almost forget his suspicions about his assistant as he continued to prove a hardworking- if distractingly handsome- asset to his staff. 

It wasn’t long before Yamcha awoke one morning to find another delivery of fresh clothing waiting in the antechamber of his quarters- formal wear. After trying it on and appreciating just how classy it made him look, he changed back into his usual armor. He’d undoubtably find out what this was for later. 

The morning was spent with Yamcha taking notes as Frieza attended a meeting- when the aliens remarked on his unreadable text he claimed it was a form of shorthand so as to once again avoid admitting he was illiterate in whatever written script seemed to be the norm in space- and the evening? 

“So it’s basically a formal dinner party?” 

“I suppose that’s one way of describing it,” Frieza nodded, “my lower staff will handle the details of hosting it, you’ll simply be attending for appearances’ sake and to handle any minor issues that may arise so as to keep myself free to focus on the guests. Otherwise you may relax and enjoy the meal. Just keep in mind the attendees will all be very powerful figures politically or financially, and the main purpose of this event is networking, so do try to make a positive impression, won’t you?” 

“Gotcha!” 

Now minutes prior to the event, Yamcha looked over his notes. There would be a sort of cocktail hour to start things off with drinks and appetizers, then the formal meal where business would be discussed, then more drinks and dancing. He glanced at his boss, who was dressed in something similar to a tuxedo. It looked incredible on him, but he wasn’t surprised by that at this point. Frieza made any outfit look great. He wondered if he planned on joining the dancing? 

Looking down at himself and the similar attire he was in he wondered if he’d have the guts to put the skills he’d been working on in private into public use. He’d just have to see how strong the drinks were. 

The two men were intentionally amongst the last to arrive, and they entered a large, grand room with what looked like around a hundred or so guests in attendance, mingling around the room as the wait staff carried trays of drinks and finger food. Of course, the most powerful man in space always made an entrance simply by existing, and all eyes were on the two of them as they entered. 

Yamcha could hear the hushed whispers- “It’s Lord Frieza!” “Yeah that’s him alright, don’t piss him off!” “Who’s the guy with him? Is that his date?” This lasted for a few minutes before the atmosphere returned to normal and everyone relaxed a bit. 

After having Yamcha bring him a glass of red wine, Frieza stepped away from his assistant to speak with some of the assorted beings present. Yamcha took this chance to get himself a drink- but as he moved away from the the overwhelming feeling of Frieza’s ridiculously powerful unsuppressed Ki he became aware of several other notable ones (although none that could match the emperor’s) - then he suddenly noticed another downright terrifying one, and while not in the room, it was close.

Not wanting to call attention to what he’d recently been reminded was a rare ability he didn’t alert Frieza and instead quietly stepped away in pursuit of this scary strong power… but there was something about it that was somewhat familiar? Had he felt it before?

He quietly left the room, fully on guard. 

\- - - 

Frieza excused himself from an incredibly dull conversation with the leader of an equally dull nation he’d almost forgotten he sold a planet to several years prior and scanned the room, looking for his assistant without luck. Where had he gone? Distracted by this he didn’t notice someone approach until they were right behind him. “It’s been a while, sempai,” a sarcastic voice greeted him. 

“Ugh…” With a heavy sigh, Frieza turned around and faced his counterpart from another universe. “Frost. One of these days I do hope you’ll let me in on the details of how you keep managing to travel to my universe.” 

The blue Icejin, dressed in a carbon copy of his counterpart’s outfit and holding a glass of white wine, smiled with a fake innocence. “Oh? So you can come pay me a visit?” 

“No, so I can shut it down. You only come here to irritate me or to make unsuccessful efforts toward killing me. What’s today’s plan, Frost? A little of both, I assume?” 

“I’m only here to enjoy this lovely gathering,” he replied, taking a sip of his drink. “But I did see something interesting. Just who was that with you earlier? He looked like one of us.” 

“I don’t see any need to answer your questions. Now, will you leave or will I have to force you?” 

“Oh come now, you can’t fault me for being curious!” Frost leaned in, dropping his volume a bit. “Was that your partner? He’s splendid.” 

Frieza raised a hand between them and took a step back. “If you must know that’s my personal assistant. Much like myself he’s royalty - a prince in fact-, and immensely powerful. Stay away from him.” 

“I’d rather do the opposite. I wouldn’t mind getting wrapped up in those burly arms of his-“ 

“I’d prefer if you stopped fantasizing about my assistant. Again, do you plan to leave or will I need to make you?” 

“Oh come now Frieza, like it or not you know the two of us think alike on quite a bit. There’s no way you haven’t noticed what a catch this assistant is. I’ll bet you have him ‘assisting’ you in all sorts of ways-“ 

“Nothing so untoward as you’re suggesting-“ 

“Is that the case?” Frost smiled, “Then you wouldn’t mind if I invited him to have a drink with me?” 

Frieza violently grabbed the other Icejin by the front of his jacket, then quickly let go, forcing himself to calm down and lower his hands before he made a scene. “I know you’re only attempting to rile me up. Especially considering how you have that embarrassing unrequited crush on that assassin, what with how you’ve been pathetically chasing him ever since the tournament of power.” 

Frost’s cool demeanor dropped at that, a blush on his face as he angrily replied, “I certainly don’t have a ’crush’ on Hit, and if I did it’s not unrequited, he’s the one that’s been chasing me!” 

The emperor rolled his eyes. “You’re an embarrassment to the both of us, you know.” 

They glared at each other for a moment, then Frost leaned in slightly and said in a hushed voice, “alright, Frieza. How about this? If you tell me what’s really going on between you and the hottie, I’ll be honest about myself and Hit.” 

“Your error here is assuming I care about your personal life, Frost.” 

“Oh fine then, you tell me about your little secret romance, and I’ll tell you what I’m up to in your universe this time.” 

“We’re getting closer to a deal. I’ll hold up my half then if you tell me both things.” 

“Oh? So you do care after all?” Frost smirked. 

“Only because I’d like to hear you have to admit it yourself. Now if we have a deal start talking, if not then I’ll have to risk getting your foul blood on my guests, and I’d rather not have to end this gathering on such a messy note.” 

“Alright, it’s a deal.” Frost paused to finish his glass of wine, watching with smug satisfaction as Frieza impatiently tapped his toe. “You’re right that there is some… romantic tension between Hit and myself. We’ve been working together since the tournament of power. He hasn’t made a move yet but it’s just a matter of time! Proof of that, as well as the answer to what I’m doing here today, is he let me hire him to assassinate you at a substantial discount on his regular rate!” 

“Very romantic indeed,” Frieza replied dryly, and turned to walk away. 

“Wait! You still need to tell me your real relationship with the prince!” 

The emperor kept walking. “Oh you poor hopeless thing. How many times must I teach you that you can’t trust me before you take that lesson to heart? Now if you’ll excuse me I have to find Hit before he makes good on the charity he gave you.” 

\- - - 

“You’re not going to kill me?” Yamcha asked, dumbfounded, from where he’d been knocked flat on his ass moments prior. 

“You aren’t my target,” Hit replied, walking away with his hands in his pockets and eyes shut. 

“And let me guess, that’s- Frieza?!” At that moment the man in question entered the hallway, followed by Frost. 

Yamcha immediately recognized the other Icejin, much like he’d recognized Hit, from seeing him at the Gods of Destruction’s tournament. 

Well, if he’d just wanted Frieza dead, he could just step back and let a professional do the honors. But if someone else did it he’d lose that chance at respect he’d so craved, and besides… since he’d had the revelation that the tyrant might not be unredeemable after all that was seeming like the more appealing option. So he forced himself to his feet, his Ki flaring from it’s usual suppressed state as he jumped between the assassin and his target. “Alright Hit, let’s see what you can really do- huh?” 

Hit just ignored them both and kept walking, leaving. “Wait, he’s right here, where are you going?!” Frost demanded, running after him. 

Frieza glared at the door, then turned to Yamcha, who quickly resumed hiding his strength. “Are you alright, my prince?” 

“Yeah, just a little bruised. When I realized Hit was here I figured he was probably after you and I had to intervene, but damn, ‘Hit’ is right, that guy really packs a punch!” 

“I’m curious… how is it that you knew who he is?” 

Yamcha certainly couldn’t admit he’d seen him in action before. “Well, he’s pretty much a legend in his field, I’d heard enough about him-“ 

“A legend, yes, but not in this universe.” Frieza’s eyes narrowed. “It’s time for you to be honest with me, prince.” 

Crap! The former human mentally smacked himself in the face. How had he screwed this up? Thankfully he hadn’t mentioned Frost! He played dumb. “Well, I traveled a lot, I mean a LOT, and met so many people and heard so many stories from all over, it’s no surprise that included tales of someone from so far away!” 

The emperor looked him over critically. He’d thought that perhaps the reason his forces had never found Yamcha, despite his high power level, was because he had a transformation to hide it that he had been lying about. But maybe… maybe it was a larger and more concerning dishonesty than he’d realized. 

Maybe he hadn’t been hidden in this universe all those years. Maybe he was from an entirely different one. And if he hadn’t been lying about his strength then he shouldn’t have been able to just get up like that after taking a blow from someone like Hit. 

…which would imply it was all an act. Was Frost plotting something more sinister than a normal revenge this time? More suspicious than ever, they returned to the festivities. 

\- - - 

“He was right there! Why’d you walk away?” Frost demanded. Safely back in their own universe, he jabbed Hit in the chest with his tail. “That was a perfect opportunity!” 

The assassin crossed his arms. “If I think there’s a strong chance I will wind up in a fight that I can’t win I withdraw and find a different angle.” 

“You said you could kill Frieza with ease!”

“I didn’t realize there would be another. His assistant…” 

“Oh, him,” Frost was dismissive. “I tried to manipulate the truth out of Frieza and of course he was duplicitous as ever, but I’m fairly sure that ‘Prince’ is just his lover. I doubt he’ll be any trouble for you.” 

“What gives you the impression they’re together?”

“Because he was looking at him the same way I look at y-“ Frost stopped himself from saying something embarrassing and looked at the sky instead of his companion, “-the way I look at things I like.” 

Hit noticed the slip, but didn’t say anything about it, returning to the main topic. “Lover or not, I’m more concerned he’s acting as Frieza’s bodyguard. From how he took a direct strike as well as the speed of his motions before we left it looks like he could potentially be stronger than Frieza.” 

“You can’t be serious!” 

Hit didn’t reply, instead closing his eyes, deep in thought. 

\- - - 

Back in Universe 7, it’s emperor had just completed the actual dining portion of the dinner party, spending most of it locked in discussion with a former client of his who was now potentially interested in hiring out military help for some border dispute. It hadn’t left him much time to think about other matters, but as his staff cleared the room for the final portion of the evening his eyes fell back on his assistant. He watched Yamcha completely charming a few of his guests a few yards away. While they were too far away for the tyrant to be able to clearly hear their conversation he could see that whatever he was saying to them had them laughing. The Prince’s animated facial expressions and open smile had a way of drawing people in… 

…including Frieza. He forced himself to look away. 

He wanted him. He wanted him so badly that even if it wasn’t for the multitude of other red flags he’d never be able to trust him. The ‘man of his dreams’ could only exist in exactly that. Fantasy. 

The lights were dimmed slightly and a band that had set up off to the side began to play, and slowly the floor started to fill with dancers. Yamcha excused himself from his conversation and took a look around. He’d been on alert ever since his altercation earlier but it seemed Hit and Frost really had left the planet, if not the universe. 

After determining that they were, for the moment at least, safe, he sought out his boss. He found him on the other side of the room, looking hopelessly bored in conversation with someone Yamcha didn’t recognize. 

“And with those numbers in mind we can project an annual growth equal to at least point five percent of the prior year’s earnings-“ droned on the unknown person. As Yamcha approached, Frieza looked up and couldn’t help but smile slightly. 

“As thrilling as this conversation is it appears my assistant has a matter that requires my attention.” Frieza stated, cutting the other person off and meeting the taller Icejin. Trust him or not, he was still the most interesting thing at this party. “How are you feeling, my dear prince?” 

“Seriously, don’t even worry about it, I mean, I can tell I was recently sucker punched and all, but I’m like, ridiculously resilient. I’ll be fine!” Yamcha replied. “How’s the networking?” 

“Abysmal. I’ve found only one viable lead all evening and even if it does translate into a proper business deal it won’t be a notably profitable one. I’m nearly at the point of deciding to cut my losses and call it a night.” 

“Aww, that sucks.” Yamcha empathized. In the moment of quiet that followed he paid proper attention to the music for the first time. He counted the beats in his head- he wasn’t familiar with the piece but it was definitely a waltz. “So what’s the plan from here? Gonna suffer through some more business chat, or leave? Or… were you planning to dance?” 

“The first and the last both sound unbearable. I think I’ll have a drink instead.” As they each accepted a glass of red wine from one of the waiters the song ended and another began- still a waltz. 

Yamcha took a few sips of his drink. He’d always been more of a beer or whiskey guy, but after spending a bit of time with Frieza he was starting to sorta see wine’s appeal. “So you don’t dance? I’m surprised, considering you’re the one hosting this whole thing.” 

Frieza shrugged. “Of course I dance. Being well versed in these sorts of social graces is an unfortunately necessary part of diplomacy. It’s a good opportunity to find a few minutes of isolated closeness with someone to work out the basics of a business deal, as well as a chance to build simulated trust. But there’s no one here I feel the need to do that with.” 

“Ya know plenty of people just dance for the fun of it… You’re pretty graceful, I bet you’re good at it,” Yamcha nudged the smaller man. 

“Of course I’m good at it,” he nudged Yamcha back, once again unable to stop himself from smiling a bit, “and I’ll bet you’re terrible, considering you’re clumsy enough to trip over your own tail on a semi-regular basis.” 

“We could find out,” Yamcha offered Frieza his arm. 

“Are you asking me to dance?” 

“I mean, I’m trying to. If that’s cool?” 

Frieza accepted the offer and they quickly finished their drinks before stepping out onto the dance floor. “I don’t think I’ve ever been the one asked prior to this moment. Most people are far too intimidated, so if there’s someone I feel I’d benefit from working with, I have to be the one to ask them.” 

“Oh, I’m intimidated,” Yamcha laughed, “but too intrigued to let a thing like that make me pass up this opportunity!” 

As the song reached a grand sweep the two men began their dance. Yamcha was momentarily distracted by the feel of Frieza’s trim waist as he positioned his hand and almost tripped, much to the other’s amusement. He forced himself instead to concentrate on everything he’d been practicing and quickly recovered, 

Frieza had been dancing as a social obligation most of his life so it took little thought for his body to fall into the usual patterns. His surprise was visible when, other than one initial misjudged step, his prince was half decent dancer. A little stiff, and a bit overly forceful when he led, but competent enough. For the first time possibly ever the emperor realized dancing was, in this instance at least, not a chore, but a pleasure. 

As for Yamcha, as he predicted Frieza was a confident and downright lovely dance partner. It didn’t take long to find their flow and he stopped worrying about counting steps and simply found himself enjoying the experience. A large part of it was the closeness it required… it was as intimate at the massage had been, possibly more so. He looked down into Frieza’s piercing red eyes and couldn’t look away. This cruel, evil being certainly made it easy to fake a romance with him.

They danced the rest of that song, and then the next, and the next… they both lost track of time. During a particularly slow number Frieza leaned against his assistant’s chest and said, “You’re really a strange man, my prince.” 

“You’re way stranger, my lord,” Yamcha answered, wrapping his arms around his boss. He was fascinated by how he felt so small as he held him, yet so unimaginably powerful with those muscles and that Ki… 

The band announced the next song would be their last, and launched into something more upbeat. Frieza reluctantly pulled away from Yamcha and glanced around the room. “We seem to have drawn quite a few eyes…” 

“Of course we did, we’re a gorgeous set of amazing dancers,” Yamcha laughed. 

“Perhaps we are, but either way, I think we should leave before the event formally ends. I’d rather avoid any further boring conversations with that lot.” As they left the dance floor Yamcha didn’t let go of the other man’s hand. It felt good. 

Leaving the citadel that had hosted the event and returning to Frieza’s main ship, the emperor contemplated what came next. He really couldn’t trust Yamcha, especially after what had transpired that day. But… he didn’t want to say good night to this man that he liked far more than he should. In the short space of their time together he’d gone from having an aversion to being touched to craving it… at least when it came from this handsome prince. 

Without saying anything, he kept his grip on his assistant’s hand and headed to his quarters. He’d create an opportunity. He’d leave it up to Yamcha as to what he did with it. 

End Chapter Seven: To Socialize

Author’s Note: 

I love Frost. I love Hit. I love Frit. This is the second thing I’ve published with them in it, but I really need to finish the fic I started drafting last year staring them… Anyway hope you all enjoyed the suspicion and romance! And if you did- or didn’t- leave a comment? Those of you who’ve taken the time to do so so far, you’re my heroes!


	8. Need Your Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their night of dancing, Frieza tries to bait Yamcha into showing his true intentions... but they wind up having a deeply personal conversation instead.

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Eight: Need Your Touch

It took Yamcha a moment to realize what was going on as he was wordlessly lead into Frieza’s quarters. Once inside with the door closed behind them, the emperor let go of his subordinate’s hand and headed to his closet, casually undressing from his formal attire. 

Yamcha swallowed hard. Sure, he saw Frieza walking around naked all the time, but it was still undeniably erotic watching the smaller man strip down. 

“Much better… While I understand it’s important social role in so many cultures I still dislike wearing this sort of stuffy attire, wouldn’t you agree?” Frieza asked, stretching a bit and enjoying the new freedom of motion that being naked provided. 

“I don’t know, you look pretty good in it. Or not in it. Or just in general!” Yamcha made himself cringe. His old phobias had a way of creeping back out at the most inconvenient of moments and he had to use all his will to calm his racing heart. It wasn’t fair that pure evil was gorgeous… 

“You act like that’s a surprise,” Frieza replied, playfully running the tip of his tail down his assistant’s side. “You’re welcome to take your own off. It’s a wonderful look for you as well but I value your comfort.” The flirtation was intentional. If Yamcha was a sent by Frost from Universe 6 then he wanted him to assume the emperor’s guard was down… then when he attempted something treacherous, Frieza would finally have his answer and destroy him.

“Oh, right… Okay then!” The former human removed his jacket and shirt but left the pants, as his body was responding more than he’d like to Frieza’s touch but he didn’t want the other to notice. 

…Frieza noticed. For a moment his prior confidence was shaken. An act or not, well, there was definitely a real physical attraction under it. 

Reminding himself that he was supposed to be sweeping the smaller man off his feet Yamcha forced himself to push down the anxiety and dial up the charm. “Seriously though you impressed me tonight! I should know better than to be surprised by your skill at anything at this point, but dang, you’re such an incredible dancer! I’d love to do that again soon!” 

“Your proficiency was a welcome surprise as well,” Frieza smiled. “I’d dance with you any time-“ 

Yamcha quickly closed the space between them and slipped one hand behind Frieza’s back, pulling him close. “Any time? So now?” He laughed as he pulled the surprised emperor through a few steps. 

“I should say any time there’s music- oof!” Both men tripped over Yamcha’s tail and wound up on the floor in pile. 

Yamcha looked down at Frieza, their faces inches apart. “Sorry about that.” 

Frieza glared. “You’re on top of me, prince.” 

“Sorry about that too.” 

“And I’m on the floor.” 

“I should probably do something about this?” 

“Yes. Yes you should.” 

Yamcha stood up, scooped up Frieza (who was a lot heavier than he looked!) and tossed him onto his bed. “There! Problem solved!” 

With his incredible speed the emperor swung his tail around and pulled Yamcha off his feet and onto the bed next to him. “As clumsy as you are it’s probably safest this way.” 

“Ha ha, maybe,” he replied. Any sense he ever had of control over the situation was long gone by this point. They were in bed together. In BED. Was this an invitation? Trembling slightly, he reached his hand out and gently stroked Frieza’s arm. “Does this make you feel safe?” 

The emperor loved that touch, and the odd thing was, it did make him feel safe. Ridiculous considering he was trying to entrap the other man into proving he couldn’t be trusted… “We’ll see. I am curious though, where did you learn to dance? You never struck me as being as duty bound as I am myself, nor as the sort to pursue such a skill for it’s own sake.” 

The change of topic away from the prior out and out flirtation helped Yamcha’s confidence return, and he continued his light touching of the other man as he replied honestly, “I had an ex that was really into the whole idealized romance bullshit. She made us take dance lessons, then later after we broke up she encouraged me to go back to practicing it since, well, as you yourself have kinda noticed, I can be a bit graceless.” 

“I see. I suppose I have to thank this ex of yours, then, for such an enjoyable portion of our evening,” Frieza replied. “Were you two… serious?” 

“For a while, yeah…” Yamcha sighed. “I even bought the ring. But things didn’t work out.” 

“Ring?” 

“It’s a tradition in her culture. You give a ring to someone as a symbol that you want to be together for the rest of your life.” 

“My goodness, if things were so dedicated, why aren’t you at her side right now?”

“…because she dumped me and had a baby with a guy that was indirectly responsible for pretty much killing me.” 

The reply was unexpected enough that Frieza actually laughed a little as he pushed back down the tiny slivers of jealousy that had been paining him. “I suppose that’s an acceptable reason! Do you miss her?” 

The former human paused, thought it over, and answered once again honestly. “Not really. We’re better as friends than we ever were as lovers. No regrets though, she was the first person I was ever serious with. Taught me a _lot_ about what I really need in a partner.” 

“And what would that be?” Frieza asked, giving Yamcha the most heart stoppingly sexy little smile. 

“I’ve got a type,” Yamcha leaned closer to the other man, ignoring his once again pounding heart. “Beautiful, demanding, intelligent, outspoken, knows their own worth… that sort.” 

“I-I see,” not the response he’d expected, and it affected him more than it should have to hear himself described. 

“If you’re gonna ask about my love life I think it’s fair you tell me about yours,” Yamcha’s hand came to rest on Frieza’s hip. 

“There isn’t much to tell, most of my relationships were arranged for business or political purposes.” 

“Most?” 

“There was someone… I pursued him and we dated briefly. It went poorly and I ended it, but he made one of my best subordinates so I suppose it wasn’t all a complete loss.” 

Now this was of obvious interest to the faux Icejin. “Really? What was he like? Why’d you dump him?” 

After the way he’d felt hearing about Yamcha’s ex Frieza felt the need to try and inspire a similar jealousy, as petty as that was. “In a word, gorgeous. Tall, well built, and he had this incredible long, soft hair.”

He liked hair? For the first time Yamcha wondered what Frieza would think of his true human form… 

“I liked his looks, and he was strong. I thought he had the potential to be someone that wouldn’t hold me back. But he was prissy to a sometimes obnoxious degree, and far too afraid of me.” 

“I thought you liked it when people were afraid of you? I mean isn’t that your whole end goal and all?”

“Oho ho ho, you see the problem, my dear prince? That is exactly why I came to the conclusion that romance wasn’t something I would have any use for in the future. If they’re terrified of me then they aren’t suitable as a partner, and if they aren’t scared? Then either they’re an idiot or they’re up to something untrustworthy.” As he delivered the last statement he gave Yamcha a suspicious look, but the subtlety was lost on the taller man as he was too busy thinking over the rest of what Frieza had shared. 

Vegeta really did know what he was talking about. Tall, the hair, not prissy? That was Yamcha alright- even his Icejin form kept that aesthetic with those… things? On his head. He had no idea what they were and wasn’t about to ask. 

Of course he had the same major flaw that this ex apparently did- he was scared of Frieza. Although in moments like this he could almost forget it… 

“Anyway he was still a strong and capable warrior who showed me the proper respect so I put him in your position as my right hand man.” 

“What happened to him then? Did you have to fire him?” 

“No, he was killed in combat a few years ago.” 

“Ah. I hope that’s not a running theme for your personal assistants…” Yamcha laughed it off but he was unnerved by how casually Frieza mentioned the death of not only an associate, but a former lover.

“You are far, far stronger than he was. Far less rigid in your thinking as well. Likely the only threat to your life would be if you did something to make me angry.” 

“…got it.” 

In the silent moment that followed, Frieza watched the other man carefully. The threat in his prior sentence had the desired effect, and Yamcha had froze up, visibly nervous. His fear was adorable. Of course, it also a reason why, in the impossible event that the prince actually was everything he claimed he was, the emperor could never seriously consider him as a partner. That long buried part of him that longed for a proper romance wanted equal respect from someone who could approach him without constantly double checking himself- 

-he hadn’t expected Yamcha to, after a moment’s surprise, laugh it off and continue lightly stroking his arm. Damn him… 

Damn him for reminding him of what he could never have! 

But he couldn’t let himself get too caught up in his thoughts right now, so he kept the conversation going. “Well prince, while we’re discussing such things I’d like to know about your other former partners.” 

“How about this?” Yamcha was surprised at how well things were going. It helped that after surviving a punch from Hit of all people he was feeling stronger than ever, and just a little less scared around Frieza as a result. To think, so recently he’d been told not to act ‘familiar’ and yet here they now were sharing a bed and having such a personal conversation… “One for one. I tell you about an ex and then you do the same?” 

“Alright then, but I think you’ll be disappointed,” Frieza replied serenely. “So go on then.” 

“So there was this guy,” Yamcha began, “when I first met him we were rivals. In fact he beat the shit out of me, even broke my leg! But he changed and grew a lot, and our rivalry became a friendship, and honestly I respect him more than almost anyone I know for his mental and physical strength.”

“Do you respect him more than me?” Frieza asked teasingly. 

“Of course not, my lord!” Yamcha replied, and continued, “he wasn’t bad looking either- buff, bald, and his eyes were pretty unforgettable. Meeting him was the first time I was attracted to another man actually.”

That wording seemed odd to Frieza, but he supposed perceived gender might have been given more importance in the prince’s colony than his own culture. But he didn’t over worry it, especially as his heart was too busy skipping a beat over hearing another description of someone Yamcha had desired that was so similar to himself. “And what happened from there?” 

“Turns out the attraction was mutual, but that was it- he’s too single mindedly dedicated to his craft as a martial artist to have the time or energy to devote to a relationship. We stayed close friends, but never went anywhere past the ‘sometimes we make out when we’re drunk’ phase of things.” 

Frieza laughed at that. “How pitiful! But I’m enjoying this insight into your past. Anyone else?” 

“No way, we made a deal. I shared, now it’s your turn!” 

Frieza sighed. Well, what was the harm in telling him about… “I hadn’t had any other relationships of note, but there is one man… Tell me, my prince, have you ever had someone who, despite your every effort otherwise, somehow seems to have a fate tied to your own?” 

“I’m not really sure what you mean by that.” 

“In terms of hours the time we spent together was incredibly brief, but every moment was significant. He was… splendid, really. Roguishly handsome, tall, and he had this disgustingly wild hair that he somehow made appealing. But he was stupid. So, so stupid! More importantly, he was, beyond any doubt, the strongest person I have ever met. The only person to truly rival myself, in fact.” 

Wait a second… “So uh, what happened with him?” Yamcha asked, even though he was pretty sure he knew the answer. 

“I offered him a position in my forces and he repaid me by nearly killing me.” 

It had to be. 

Frieza misunderstood Yamcha’s stunned silence. “Yes, he really was that strong. From there on any attraction was long since eclipsed by an absolute burning rage at the very thought of him and despite the several times our paths have crossed since then I have dreamed of nothing more than seeing him and everything he cares about dead! The most repulsive part of all of this?” He paused, relaxing his clenched fists and smiling a little. “You’re going to judge me for this, and I won’t blame you, as I judge myself. But he was one of those last few remaining filthy Saiyans.” 

“Oh. Ew?” Yamcha made himself say it because obviously he was supposed to say something, but he was still too shocked by the confirmation of who Frieza had once been so attracted to. Geez… If he was competing with Goku for Frieza’s heart then did he really have a chance? 

Well, Frieza himself had said the hate was more powerful than the attraction, but this was as good of a reminder as any that Yamcha needed to up his game. “Well, maybe someday you’ll find someone that isn’t either a nasty monkey that makes you angry or too chicken to love you properly.” 

“I’ve long since stopped looking. Maturity has shown that romance isn’t a necessity to live the life of power that I have achieved.” 

“Just because you aren’t looking doesn’t mean it won’t find you,” Yamcha replied, gently touching the side of the smaller man’s face. Was he blushing a little? Too cute… 

Both of their hearts were pounding at this point as they looked into each other’s eyes, but Frieza looked away after a moment and lightly replied, “you’re being too familiar again, you know.” 

Deciding to push past his nervousness, Yamcha took a gamble and removed his hand, but then used it instead to take the emperor’s. “I don’t mean to be too ‘familiar.’ I just want to serve you, in whatever way you need it, my lord.”

The invitation couldn’t be more clear but Frieza had to turn it down, as much as he wished otherwise. “You’re serving me quite well as my personal assistant, prince.” 

Shot down, Yamcha reluctantly let go of his boss. “Got it! You can count on me for that!” 

Immediately regretting his choice but knowing he needed to stand by it, Frieza replied, “Of course. That said, I suppose being a little familiar could be acceptable, in the right context.” 

Oh? Yamcha nodded slowly, eyes wide. “Really? Okay then, uh, stop me if I go too far okay?” 

“Alright.” 

Slowly testing the boundaries, Yamcha put his arm around Frieza, then pulled their bodies together and held him. Facing no resistance, he carefully took his tail and and loosely wrapped it with the emperor’s. 

Their bodies nearly as close as it was possible to be, Frieza buried his face against Yamcha’s chest to hide any embarrassing emotions it could be displaying and whispered, “I think this is just the right amount of familiarity.” 

“Yeah, this is… really good,” the former human replied, his nerves fading into contentment as they relaxed together. 

Frieza reminded himself he was only doing this to get Yamcha’s guard down so he’d show his true colors, but he couldn’t lie to himself and pretend he wasn’t enjoying it. He never allowed this sort of physical intimacy from anyone, he’d forgotten how incredibly good it could feel, especially when his partner in it was someone so gorgeous, so devoted, so strong, so sexy, so likable… But he couldn’t let himself get carried away here. 

He pretended to fall asleep but kept his senses sharp. Surely after a few minutes Yamcha would attempt to contact his allies from Universe 6 to tell them he had Frieza asleep and vulnerable, or maybe he’d try and kill him himself… 

Slightly tightening his arms around the other man, Yamcha smiled. It seemed he’d fallen asleep, which was really endearing. Unfortunately for the fake prince he was too physically excited to do the same- having someone as sexy as Frieza this close was really getting him. His small and curvy body with it’s rock hard muscles and that thick tail… not to mention the unique genitalia he knew from his own temporary body was hidden under the seemingly smooth skin of the emperor’s crotch… 

Was Yamcha developing a space lizard fetish? …he might be. 

But it wasn’t just his sex appeal. That forceful personality, how the attraction was obviously mutual, the little moments of closeness and vulnerability that he only shared with Yamcha, the enticing possibility that he could potentially be redeemed… All of this contributed toward the way he felt about this man- 

SHIT. 

The realization was so powerful that for a moment he let go and pulled away, clutching his hands to his mouth in a panic. He liked Frieza. He legitimately had developed a crush on the very person he was supposed to be manipulating. Cursing his open and needy heart, he took another look at the object of his desires. Surprisingly the sudden motion hadn’t awoken him. Feeling pathetic and irritated with himself, Yamcha still slid back in and carefully pulled him close again. 

Well, he was in this deep now. Might as well see what happens. 

When Frieza had felt Yamcha pull away he kept his eyes closed but tensed his muscles. Surely this was it. The confirmation of what he’d expected all along. He prepared himself mentally for an attack- 

…then the other man’s arms were back around him. 

No betrayal. Just affection. Frieza didn’t understand it and it made him incredibly angry. 

He didn’t know how much longer he could take this. He needed Yamcha to slip up, to show he’s really not perfect, to justify Frieza’s suspicions and years pushing other people away! 

Frieza rolled over, his back to Yamcha, and fell asleep for real. 

End Chapter Eight: Need Your Touch

Author’s note: 

Put some little references to some other ships I like with these two in this chapter, hopefully you could all tell who was being described each time. 

Aaaaaaaand emotions! Poor Frieza, so resistant to his feelings. Next chapter I’m warning you all right now things get, well… just prepare yourselves. 

Finally, THOSE OF YOU WHO COMMENT I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Give yourselves a high five!


	9. Last Shot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a romantic evening together, Yamcha makes his move...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Nine: Last Shot

After that night nothing changed, yet everything was different. Yamcha still served as Frieza’s assistant, although after word of their dancing together got out amongst the Frieza force quite a few rumors spread… mainly ones suggesting Yamcha’s job was just a cover, and they were actually secretly dating.

While their intimate night of cuddling and conversation hadn’t been repeated, the emperor had allowed considerably more physical contact since. His assistant frequently would put an arm around his shoulders or hold his hand even in public, and more often than not the nights ended in massage sessions at this point. 

It was easy to forget suspicions when things seemed to be going so well. Frieza did still of course feel Yamcha’s familiarity with Universe 6 was questionable, as well as how he’d hid himself and his strength for so long, not to mention the way he seemed ill at ease in his own body, as though he had other forms he was hiding. But his continued devotion… It didn’t help that the more he learned about him the more fascinated he became. His life had been full of adventures, and he envied the freedom he’d had. 

From a purely logical stance he could acknowledge that his attraction had blossomed into feelings for his assistant, but that same logic also allowed him to ignore them in the name of self preservation. 

He couldn’t trust or fully open up to someone who he knew was being dishonest with him. Everyone had their own agenda, his gorgeous prince included. 

For Yamcha, the weeks following the night he realized how he felt had been a mix of impossible highs and crushing lows. Every little sign of shared affection made him giddy, just as each of the emperor’s frequent casual cruel acts reminded him of how impossible his plan to reform him might be. The worst part was his ‘plan’ was really just a bunch of question marks at this point. How DID you get pure evil to switch sides?

His only guideline was to follow what he knew. Vegeta had gone from thoughtless killing to a family man with the help of Bulma’s love and his rivalry with Goku giving him another outlet for his anger and competitive nature. Piccolo had switched from being hellbent on revenge and conquering to one of the planet’s most dedicated heroes thanks largely to his friendship with Gohan teaching him to care about others. 

But maybe the best template for a possible redemption was Yamcha’s own past. He’d been so afraid of potential lovers that he isolated himself out in the desert, and acted in selfish, violent ways to survive, He changed not only because he found a girlfriend. He changed because, after surrounding himself with people who saw the potential in him and encouraged it, he saw at last that there could be so much more to existence than his prior lifestyle had allowed.

While he still wasn’t sure what it would take to flip Frieza, he at least had some things to keep in mind! 

If he succeeded, then maybe he could finally be fully honest with the emperor… and maybe even ask him out on a date. 

\- - - 

“Essentially, they’re ending a lease on the planet. We’ll be inspecting it so as to be sure it’s suitable for the next client. Considering it was primarily used for industrial purposes there is a chance that there could be excessive pollution or contaminates, in which case we’ll have to ensure they’re charged properly for the cleanup,” Frieza explained to the small group of his staff present in the conference room. As several scientists went over what tools they’d be taking to test for which specific substances Yamcha dutifully took notes. Once the meeting adjourned, the two Icejin walked out together. 

“I’m surprised you’re leading this personally, my lord. Inspecting a planet seems a little below your pay grade at this point,” the taller man remarked. 

Frieza smiled. “You are correct that I wouldn’t usually handle this sort of matter myself, however, I have a particular interest in this planet. It’s spectacularly scenic, which makes it very valuable. Honestly using it for manufacturing seems a waste. But there is a small tourist sector on one of it’s continents, and… well, I think we’ve both been needing a vacation. We’ll be on site for most likely three days, so make sure to pack adequately. The weather there can be volatile.” 

“You’ve got it! I’ll be looking forward to this!” 

\- - - 

Staring back at the pages and pages of notes he’d spent the day taking Yamcha sighed, slumping his shoulders. “You know, when I volunteered myself to your services I kinda thought working for you would be a lot more action and a lot less…” he paused and squinted at his own writing, “‘particles per square inch’ and ‘micro-plastic levels.’ I have no idea what this stuff means but I’m ready to shut my brain off for a while.” 

Frieza chuckled. “Do you regret pledging your devotion now that you see the grim realities of an assistant’s work?” 

Swinging his arm around his bosses shoulders, Yamcha enthusiastically replied, “not for a second!” 

“Thank goodness for that, I’d hate to have to replace you. I doubt I’d ever find anyone else that gives such excellent massages. Now, if you’re seriously wanting to ‘shut your brain off’ that can be arranged. Our work day is over- let’s head into town.” 

After excusing the environmental scientists and others on the inspection team the two Icejin flew off. Under most circumstances Frieza preferred to travel by ship or other means, but they weren’t far from their destination, and more importantly, he wanted his companion to get a look at the landscape. As he expected, Yamcha was impressed. 

“Wow! There was so much snow a moment ago, and now it’s suddenly bone dry and burning hot out? This place is nuts!” As he looked down at the desert below him, with it’s brightly colored towering rock formations, he smiled a bit. “I lived a while in a place like this, it really left a part of itself inside me I think. This still feels like home.” 

“Ah yes, from your bandit years,” Frieza loved those stories. He continued to enjoy the other man’s enthusiastic chatter as they passed rapidly through several other distinctly different climate zones. Soon, they reached their destination, an area of jagged mountains covered in tall, ancient trees that surrounded a perfectly clear lake. The whole area was dusted in snow, and a picturesque town sat beside the water. With the sunset reflected on the lake and backlighting the terrain it all looked like a scene from a postcard. “And so we arrive.” 

“So this is that tourist district? I can see why this area is a draw.” 

“There are various recreational opportunities here,” Frieza explained, “In warmer seasons the lake is popular for swimming and the like, and the some people hike and camp in the mountains year round. But I prefer the more relaxing pastimes.” They landed in the town, which was bustling with activity. “Our first matter of business will be procuring proper attire, and after that,” he smiled up at his assistant, “you’ll join me for a drink, won’t you?” 

Momentarily too dazzled by the perfect curve of the emperor’s lips to reply, Yamcha found his words after a moment and nodded enthusiastically. “Of course!” 

The two headed into a large store with suitably rustic decor for it’s mountain town setting and a large selection of outerwear. Yamcha had quickly learned that his temporary body could tolerate an incredible range of temperatures, including the most extreme cold, but that heat and warmth felt far better than they ever did in his real form. It made him think of all the lizards he’d seen sunning themselves on rocks back in his desert as a teen- he assumed it was a cold blooded thing. 

Of course, Frieza was instantly recognized and every employee in the place was rushing to help, and a few minutes later they left wearing long, cozy jackets. The emperor had also selected a hat, but Yamcha took one look and realized his horns would get in the way and didn’t even bother trying. Somewhat more comfortable with their coats keeping the gently falling snow off of them, they headed into a classy looking bar a few buildings down. 

The place was surprisingly empty, perhaps since it was still relatively early. Frieza took a seat in a candle lit booth near the back, and Yamcha approached the bar to order their drinks. “Okay, I’m here with someone with impeccable taste so I’m gonna need to know what the best red wines you have on offer are…” 

Yamcha joined Frieza at the booth a moment later, setting down their glasses then unbuttoning his coat. Almost without thinking his tail reached out under the table, found Frieza’s, and hooked around it. The casual intimacy they shared felt so special, and so right… “It’s an honor to get to relax with you like this, my lord.” 

“Of course! But I think you’ve earned such an honor with all your hard work over these last two months.” He looked up at his assistant, admiring the way the flickering lighting reflected in his biogems. Sampling his wine and finding it to his high standards he appreciated how well Yamcha had learned his preferences, as well as how hard he worked to accommodate them. He looked back up from his drink. 

Those eyes… his prince had the kindest eyes. 

Yamcha was well aware he was being stared at, and the scrutiny made a little nervous. Frieza was just too damn attractive… He scratched his neck and looked at his wine, then forced his nerves down and looked back. The emperor gave him one of his unnervingly sexy glares. “Are you planning on drinking that wine or just staring at it?” 

“Sorry, guess I was a little distracted,” Yamcha replied, picking up the glass and remembering everything he’d learned about proper enjoyment of the beverage as he took a sip. It was nice, but the man across from him was far more intoxicating. 

“My dear prince, I’ve been thinking… it would be lovely to take a proper vacation together at some point,” Frieza said, “I’d like to visit your home planet with you. While I know your colony was destroyed I’d still like a chance to have you show me around the world where you spent your early years.” 

The reminder that everything he had built with Frieza was founded on a lie deflated Yamcha’s mood quite a bit, but he forced a smile. “Yeah, that could be fun sometime.” 

As usual, the emperor was able to pick up on the hesitation, and sighed before draining his glass. 

The bartender, looking for any business at this slow time of day, headed to their table. “I noticed your glasses were empty, would you like another- OH. Lord Frieza, it’s so good to have you here! Your drinks are on the house of course!” 

Frieza ignored his groveling and curtly answered, “You may bring the rest of the bottle then.” He did so quickly then left them alone. Yamcha poured them each their next glass. 

“I was never a wine guy but you’ve really got me hooked on the good stuff.” 

“Indeed, you’ve become quite the connoisseur…”

By the time they were done they were both feeling relaxed again, and left the bar in good spirits. “We’ll be staying there,” Frieza pointed at sprawling lodge further down the road. 

“Looks nice!” And expensive, Yamcha thought. Not that he had to worry about money these days with as much as he was paid. 

“Aside from the guest suites there’s also a restaurant there that’s rather well reviewed, so I was thinking that would be- Yamcha?” 

Their casual stroll had brought them past a the front window of a metal craftsman’s shop, and the swords on display had distracted his assistant. “Sorry, I used to fight with a sword a lot like that one,” he indicated a slightly curved blade. “It’s been ages! I wonder if I even still have those skills anymore?” 

“We should find out!” 

\- - - 

Several hours later the two men finally checked into their suite. “For someone who claims he’s never heard of a snowball fight before you sure took that seriously!” Yamcha laughed as he took off Frieza’s soaking wet coat and draped it over the back of a chair before doing the same with his own. 

“In any sort of battle I refuse to be bested,” he replied with a smirk. “Now, I think we should get dried off and finally have our dinner.” 

“Agreed.” They headed toward the restroom, which thanks to the massive size of the suite took them a moment to find. As they left the main entry and passed through the master bedroom he whistled. “Dang, this place is nice!” 

“Only the best for us, my prince.” The bathroom was located directly off the bedroom, and was similarly massive in size and opulent in decor. Yamcha, ever the dutiful assistant, grabbed one of the huge fluffy bath towels and proceeded to dry off his boss. 

At first it was fully professional, but almost without thought he slowed down a bit, running the towel over nearly every perfect inch of Frieza’s body. While it was obvious that things had taken a sensual turn the emperor didn’t say anything. He couldn’t stop himself from smiling a bit though, as any touch from his most handsome subordinate was a pleasure. After a minute he was clearly dry and then some, and Yamcha reluctantly proceeded to dry himself. 

As he did, Frieza left the bathroom and retrieved something from the pocket of his coat. The two met back up again in the master bedroom not long after. 

“Alright, I am so ready for chow time! Let’s go!” 

“Wait just a moment, prince. Before we do, I’d almost forgotten I’d bought you a gift.” 

“Oh?” While he was constantly receiving things from the emperor, it was generally tools for his job or clothing for essential functions. This was the first time he’d been offered a proper gift.

“While you were apologizing to the shop keeper for nearly cutting his arm off with your impressive swordsmanship skills I noticed they also offered other metal crafts, including some jewelry. I thought this would look nice on your tail.” He held up a circular band of a rose gold colored metal. “May I?” 

Yamcha nodded, lifting his tail while staring wide eyed at the gift. “It’s beautiful, thank you so much!” 

Frieza slid it on, admiring it for a moment before looking back up at his assistant. “I was thinking of the symbolism you mentioned before, about how you bought a ring for someone to express a desire to stay together always. I hope you’ll continue to serve as my assistant for a similar length of time.” 

While the emperor hadn’t had the full context for the custom he was mimicking, and thus this was neither a proposal nor an engagement ring, the sentiment still overwhelmed Yamcha, and he grabbed Frieza in a big hug. “I will never take it off.”

He’d been hoping for such an enthusiastic reaction, and Yamcha never disappointed in that regard. His tendency to share his emotions so wholeheartedly was refreshing to the ever reserved Frieza. He leaned into the hug, wrapping both his arms and tail around them both. “I’m happy to hear that, my prince.” 

They stayed like that, neither making a move to end their close contact. Eventually Frieza loosened his grip slightly and leaned back so he could see his associate properly. “I suppose if you’re still ‘so ready for chow time’ as you put it we could head down-“ 

Guided not by thoughts but instead by the rush of emotions that were fighting within him, Yamcha leaned down and kissed Frieza. He felt the smaller man put his arms around his neck and pull him close. Those lips he’d been desiring for so long were as amazing as ever. Once he finally pulled back, he awkwardly apologized. “Uh, sorry, I hope that was okay, and not too uh, ‘familiar’ of me-“ 

“I’ll stop you if things get out of hand. For now, please be as familiar as you’d like.” 

Frieza tried to forget his conflicting feelings as they resumed the kiss. He’d wanted this since the moment he first laid eyes on the other Icejin. He couldn’t be rational any longer. He didn’t want to be rational any longer. 

Reaching behind him with his tail Yamcha found the edge of the bed and flopped backwards onto it, pulling Frieza down on top of him. “Still good?” He whispered against the smaller man’s neck.

“Very.” Frieza straddled his assistant and kissed him again. Yamcha stroked the emperor’s thick thighs, then ran his hands up them, pausing at his ass to give it a good squeeze before finally bringing them to rest at the base of his tail. With a wolfish grin he aggressively rubbed that sensitive spot. 

“I’m surprised you never stopped me from doing this during our massage sessions,” Yamcha remarked. 

Frieza, his back arching against the touch, replied breathlessly, “Why would I stop something that feels so good? I’ll admit it’s nice to finally be able to show my enjoyment.” He could feel his body responding to the situation and knew his arousal was on clear display but he once again decided to not worry about what he ‘should’ do and focus on what he wanted to do.

The physical excitement was obvious on Yamcha’s end as well. He flipped himself to the right so that they were laying side by side. He didn’t know the exact mechanics of how sex between the two of them would work, but he liked what he saw as he looked over his amazing lover. They could figure it out. 

But there was something he had to say first before their minds were completely clouded by lust. It was now or never… he had to make his real move. So he paused, considering his words. 

“Losing your nerve?” Frieza asked, running his fingers down the front of the taller man’s body. 

Yamcha grabbed Frieza’s hands with his own. “Hey… I have to say something. Now because if we go any further- and I want to go further!- I don’t want you to think that’s the only reason I said it.” 

The emperor met his gaze. “You have my attention.” 

“I know you have your job and your obligations and all that but- but don’t you wanna do this for real?” Yamcha stammered, pulling their hands close to his heart as he tried to find the words. “Just you and me. Every day could be a vacation. You could forget your empire and do whatever you wanted! We’ve both got more than enough money to never have to worry about work again! No obligations, no boring meetings with people you dislike, just… just whatever makes you happy.” His voice trembled slightly as he finished, “and I wanna to be what makes you happy.” 

Frieza shut his eyes, took a deep breath, and spoke carefully, each word deliberated before it was spoken. “I would want nothing more than that, a free life with you, except… I’m not a fool, Yamcha. I know ‘you’ aren’t who you say you are, at least not fully. There have been too many inconsistencies in your story, it’s been obvious since the beginning. I’ve allowed it as long as you perform your duties but… Well, perhaps I am a bit of a fool after all for getting so attached, anyway…” He sat up, staring straight ahead. “I can not give up everything for someone I don’t trust, even if he puts on the most impossibly wonderful act.” 

“I-I get it…” Yamcha sat up as well. What else could he say? It’s true, he came into this under false pretenses, while pretending to be someone he wasn’t. How could he ever expect this to work? And if he did decide to be honest, surely Frieza would be angered when he learned of Yamcha’s original goal, or worse… maybe if he found out he wasn’t a strong prince but instead just a boring human he wouldn’t even be interested anymore. “I’ve gotta… step out for a second, okay?” 

Frieza stood up. “Why does that not surprise me-“ he felt his assistant embrace him one more time, then watched the man of his dreams walk out the door. 

End Chapter Nine: Last Shot

Author’s note: 

Oh snap XD my apologies for any heartbreak caused by how this chapter ended XD 

But more importantly, the same incredible artist that created the gorgeous Icejin Yamcha design that inspired this whole fic has honored me with some BEAUTIFUL illustrations- [check them out here!](https://www.instagram.com/p/B-5gemzlyWn/?igshid=61ub2mg6pp58) SO GOOD OMG! 

Also on the subject of AMAZING art, [check out this pure greatness!](https://space-creamer.tumblr.com/post/615010817863303168/fanart-for-majinpiccolos-fanfic-perfect) I AM SERIOUSLY HONORED!


	10. Through the Wreckage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Frieza rejects him, Yamcha returns to Earth... and the Emperor experiences a startling change.

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Ten: Through the Wreckage

Completely dejected, Yamcha flew off at full speed, not pausing until he was hundreds of miles away. “I’m lucky I didn’t get killed for that,” he muttered, and sat down on the dirt, hiding his Ki. He’d flown back into one of the nostalgic desert sections of the planet, and the hot dry air felt so different from the snowy resort town he’d just left. 

Well, his plan had pretty much gone down in flames. He couldn’t bring himself to try and kill Frieza, nor could he mend his evil ways with the power of love. 

Instead he just destroyed his own heart in the process. Allowing his body to go limp he flopped down on the ground and stared up at the stars. There was no question he’d developed strong feelings for the emperor, but did he really love him? Parts of him shouted yes and no in equal measure. The only thing he knew for sure? He felt miserable. 

The stars above him… as he looked up at them, he remembered something- couldn’t Icejins survive out there? 

He needed some time to himself to process everything he’d just been through, not to mention he still had a bit of a wait before the Dragon Balls regenerated and he could get his old body back… Maybe a solo adventure in space was exactly what he needed to find himself again and get some closure on all of this. 

Without looking back he flew straight up, keeping his energy suppressed until he needed it to break out of the atmosphere, and then he was off. 

\- - - 

For nearly an hour Frieza waited, but as he somehow knew would be the case, his prince didn’t return. “None of it was real,” Frieza said to no one. He stood up, his hands slowly clenching into fists, and strode around the suite, searching for a closet. Due to the sheer size of the place it took him a minute, but there it was, containing the luggage they’d had delivered earlier that day. Intentionally ignoring his assistant’s bag, he opened his own suitcase and pulled out a scouter. 

Scanning gave no results. Yamcha must have already left the planet. So instead he contacted his ship. “I’ll be leaving the planet shortly, I’ll send my coordinates… Yes, I’ll be returning alone.” 

\- - - 

As the weeks passed normalcy returned to Frieza’s ship. Yamcha’s absence was noticed but not questioned- it wasn’t uncommon for staff members to vanish, especially ones that worked closely with the temperamental emperor. Even those who had spread rumors that they were dating assumed he’d done something to piss his boss off and been killed. 

A new assistant was promoted, then replaced, then replaced again. None of them handled the workload with the appropriate enthusiasm, or took the time to properly learn the tyrant’s preferences and needs. A frustrating and disappointing group, all of them… 

Each night before bed Frieza would pull up a computer and do some checks. For the first few days it had been easy to track his princes’ travels by watching his financial transactions. On the fourth day Yamcha appeared to have wised up and withdrew everything from his account, becoming untraceable again. But there were still methods… As a member of a nearly extinct race he occasionally drew notice, and records of his entrance or departure from certain areas would come up every few days. After that he utilized several of his shady contacts to track him further as he continued to venture off into deeper space. 

But as time moved forward he seemed to grow ever stealthier, and when a month passed without a single sign of him, Frieza had to accept he was truly lost, perhaps back to Universe 6, or wherever else he’d been hiding for the years prior to their meeting. Along with losing his former assistant’s physical location, he also lost any lingering sense of control over the situation.

It was only then that it really began to hurt. 

\- - - 

A little over a year after our story began Vegeta was training alone in the gravity room, working through his thousandth push up, then standing. He increased the machine’s settings further, and as he felt his body pulled down he fought back by powering all the way up to Blue- “What?!” 

He reflexively kicked the being who had suddenly appeared in front of him. “Shit, Vegeta, it’s me, geez, away for a year and that’s the greeting I get?” 

“Yamcha?” Looking at the now familiar Icejin he actually smiled a little, then shut off the artificial gravity. “So you are still alive. Bulma was worried otherwise. She has the Dragon Balls all ready for you-“ 

“Thank goodness! I’ve gotten pretty used to this body but I still want my old one back. Yeah, the strength is amazing and the tail is actually really useful once you get used to it but I still catch the horns on things-“ 

“Hey!” The Saiyan impatiently cut him off. “Did you do it or not?! Is Frieza dead?” 

“Yeah… about that…” Yamcha’s shoulders slumped. “I uh, actually totally bombed it. Spent a couple months with him, got pretty close but he never trusted me. I ran when he called me out on it.” 

“That’s a damn shame but I guess I should have suspected as much,” Vegeta muttered. “Hey, if you were just there for a couple months why is it only now that you’re back?” 

“Well… For one thing I had no idea how to get back to Earth,” Yamcha laughed awkwardly as he set down a backpack and duffle bag he’d been carrying. “Bulma had given me its coordinates, but I left in such a rush to get away from Frieza that I wasn’t able to retrieve where I’d wrote them down and bring it with me. So I traveled for a bit, and… I picked up this trick!” 

He lifted two fingers to his forehead and vanished. Vegeta heard Bulma scream, but before he could react Yamcha was back with a grip on her arm. 

“Instant transmission?!” 

“You’ve got it. That’s how I eventually got home too, still couldn’t find Earth so I just waited for you to power up and used your energy as a beacon.” 

Bulma recovered from her surprise and smacked him. “Don’t ever do that again, you almost gave me a heart attack!” 

“You don’t have to hit me you know, a nice ‘welcome back Yamcha’ would have worked just as well!” 

After he vanished two more times to grab Puar as well as Krillin and 18, the group headed toward the back yard, the Dragon Balls in Bulma’s bag. On the way they passed her mom in the hall. 

“Oh my, it’s Yamcha! It’s been so long, you should visit more. Did you always have horns?” After exchanging pleasantries they stepped outside. 

“See? She immediately recognized me, no violence necessary! And she hasn’t even seen me in this form before!” 

Vegeta, who’d fallen a few steps behind the rest, noticed something metallic and shiny on Yamcha’s tail. “Would you look at that? A year or so in space and you come back all fancy. Nice jewelry,” he sneered. 

With all the speed this body allowed him he whipped his tail around to the front, cradling it in his hands as he snapped, “don’t you dare say a word about it!” Lightly running his fingertips over the smooth metal he added quietly, “It’s important to me.” 

“Oh, I think I get it,” Bulma elbowed him, “sounds like someone found a girlfriend up in space and got his heart broke again-“ 

“Come on Bulma, don’t tease like that!” Yamcha forced a smile as he laughed it off. “I mean, yeah, it was a gift from someone amazing, but… it wasn’t a romance, not really.” 

Despite having given himself months on his own to heal, well… Yamcha had moved on as best he could, but he knew he’d always feel an attraction to his emperor… and a part of him would never stop wondering if things could have worked out differently for the two of them.

“All that aside, look, buddy,” Krillin said as he smiled up at his old friend, “even if you weren’t able to defeat Frieza, I bet you had one hell of an adventure, and I’m so proud of you for making the best of all this and at least trying.” 

“Thanks, it means a lot. I feel like this whole experience definitely changed me, for better or for worse who knows at this point right? By the way, how much does everyone else know?”

“We told them you were going on vacation in space, as requested!” Puar replied. “We didn’t say anything about you changing forms or going after Frieza!” 

“They wanted to preserve your dignity in case the plan failed, which it did,” Vegeta added. 

“Uh, thanks? Let’s keep it that way okay? Don’t tell anyone. Now let’s summon that Dragon and make me human again!” 

“We don’t have to rush if you’re happy in that body. You could stay in it a while…” 18 added with a shrug. 

Krillin covered his face. “Yep, it should have been me this happened to…” 

\- - - 

As time passed, Frieza became increasingly disconnected from things. More often than not he delegated even the most critical of tasks, and he rarely did more than spend time in his quarters, drinking wine, issuing the occasional order. Of course, when something big needed to be done- or could justify being done- like destroying an entire planet, he was all to happy to take care of it… it felt good to blow off some steam.

It wasn’t fair… He’d been shown a glimpse of something he’d never have. The only thing he couldn’t achieve through his power and influence was the one thing that appealed to him more than anything else. 

He had kept the statue. Even when he was most angry with ‘Prince Yamcha’ (was even his name a lie?) he couldn’t bring himself to throw it out (although there were certainly more than a few times when he nearly destroyed it). It was a powerful symbol of a more carefree period of his life, as well as of the taste of happiness he’d been so fleetingly given more recently. 

After yet another long, frustrating, boring day the emperor sat staring at it, thinking about that man who was so unlike himself. 

Frieza knew that even if he hadn’t had his suspicions he could never have allowed himself the luxury of becoming romantically involved with the prince, but he couldn’t help the overwhelming attraction that had built up between them. He wanted to move on, but how could he? There were too many unanswered questions. How much of what had so appealed to him about Yamcha actually existed? Obviously his good looks were real, but was his enthralling, dedicated, amusing, loyal personality something he and some co-conspirator like Frost had came up with just to manipulate the emperor? 

“Ugh!” he flung his empty glass across the room, then sighed. “More than anything,” he said quietly, “I just wish I had an opportunity to speak with him where he didn’t feel he needed to lie to me, so I could get some closure… and finally see the person Yamcha truly is…” 

Suddenly the statue started to glow. “What?!” As Frieza stood up, a similar light covered his body, and everything felt… off. 

Before he could understand what was happening the room around him completely changed from his quarters to an open street somewhere he didn’t recognize. Rain was pouring down and Frieza felt strangely overheated. 

“What is going on?!” He took a step, lost his balance, and fell sideways, landing on the damp concrete. It hurt far more than it should have, and he looked down at the hand that he’d broke the fall with- and gasped not because his normally immensely tough skin was bleeding, but because his skin had an almost pinkish tint and his nails looked wrong. 

Panicking, he tried to stand and fell again. His tail- where was his tail?! And his feet were too narrow- a look confirmed he was wearing clothing for some reason, including a pair of tight shoes. Afraid of what he’d see, he slowly removed one, revealing a strange, five toed foot completely unlike his usual. He reached one trembling hand up and touched the top of his head- yep, hair. 

“I’m… I’m a mammal?!” In one final desperate panic he shoved his hand down his pants, then gasped again. “What the heck is this?!” 

He carefully got to his feet, fighting against gravity. With his balance so thrown off by the lack of tail and strange feet he figured flying might be easier, but he couldn’t. He seemed to have lost control of his energy- he could barely even feel it in fact. 

He was too distracted by whatever was happening to his body to pay much attention where he was walking, and he took one careful, deliberate step forward- right into the street. A loud honking pulled his attention back to reality and he stared at the truck that was barreling toward him. 

“Watch out!” Suddenly someone had grabbed him and pulled him back to the sidewalk. 

The whole strange situation had Frieza thoroughly in ‘fight or flight’ mode and he elbowed whoever had grabbed him hard in the chest. “Unhand me- oof!” He’d again lost his balance and landed flat on his ass. Looking up, he saw-

-WHAT?!

“Y-Yamcha?” he asked in a shaky whisper. 

Standing over him was a tall being that also appeared to be a mammal, with his long wild hair and lack of horns or tail… but he had a distinctive set of facial scars and kind eyes that looked down, concerned. 

Yamcha(?) held out a hand. “Baseball fan, huh? Yep, you were just saved by a hall of famer! Normally I’d offer an autograph or to take a selfie with you or whatever, but I’m kinda in a hurry to meet some people today.” 

Frieza just stared, his eyes locked on that bafflingly familiar face.

“Oh, uh, don’t worry, you’re not the first fan I’ve seen get tongue tied! And you’re probably still shaken up from well, almost becoming road kill and all. Here,” he handed him his umbrella. “Try and be more careful, okay? Later!” 

Watching him leave, Frieza saw a small flying rodent he hadn’t initially noticed transform into a blue umbrella and float over the man’s head as he headed off down the street. With as much strangeness as he’d just experienced that act of shapeshifting hardly even made an impression on the emperor. Closing the umbrella he’d been offered and using it instead as a cane he finally got to his feet. 

What was going on? Where was he? Why had his body changed? And most baffling of all, who was that being that seemed so much like his prince yet wasn’t an Icejin? 

Wait… the statue… Of course! It seemed its power was legitimate after all? It was almost funny… apparently this was his true, greatest desire. 

Well, if this was his opportunity to finally learn the truth, he wasn’t going to squander it. Starting with finding out if that man from a moment ago really was his prince!

He took a step forward, fell over again, and cursed. 

\- - -

Out in space, an unfamiliar craft approached Frieza’s ship.

“The scans say he’s been just wasting away in his quarters for weeks at this point,” Frost said smugly, “and that ‘assistant’ of his has been gone for months now. This is the perfect time to finally have my revenge! Which form is he currently in?” 

Hit ran another quick check of Frieza’s power level. “Hmm?” 

“What, did he get so depressed that he went back into his first form? Or did he realize we were coming and switch to Golden?” 

“…he’s gone.”

“WHAT?!” Frost rushed to Hit’s side, looking down at the screen in front of them. “He was here a moment ago! Damn it… I don’t care what it takes, we need to find him and kill him!” 

End Chapter Ten: Through The Wreckage 

Author’s note: 

Aaaand now, for anyone who hadn’t already guessed this would happen from my ‘two transformations’ bit in the fic’s description, we enter the second part with the second big twist! While human Frieza designs aren’t rare, I’m exceedingly fond of the one by the same amazing artist that was this fic's inspiration- [check out Pen’s human Frieza here! ](https://www.instagram.com/p/B8SZsOmlBvR/)

Oh, once again 18 is a stand in for a certain subset of Icejin fans. We know who we are XD

One more thing, I’m totally referencing a certain classic YamBul scene from OG DB here, if anyone caught that. Except this time it’s Frieza instead of Bulma. 

Anyway this chapter took longer to edit than any other so far because I couldn’t get satisfied with it and kept adding/changing things. Still not happy. Oh well. We’re about two thirds of the way through the story now- I am absolutely honored that I’ve got some readers following along so enthusiastically. My commenters here and on the Yamza discord and various other places- I LOVE YOU.


	11. Perfect Strangers Meet Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frieza struggles with this human body and lies his way through a reunion with Yamcha. The old chemistry returns as strong as ever...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Eleven: Perfect Strangers Meet Again

“Let’s see,” Gohan leaned around Yamcha to look out the window. “Yep, he’s still out there.” 

Yamcha sighed and covered his face. “It’s been an hour at this point. Maybe I should go talk to him.” 

“Oh hell no!” Krillin replied, “If he’s enough of a weirdo to stand out there that long in the soaking rain just staring then he’s clearly unstable. And you said he hit you pretty hard when you saved him, right?” 

Several friends had met up for an early dinner that afternoon, but the topic of discussion had been dominated by one thing- what they’d been calling ‘Yamcha’s stalker.’

“Well, a lot harder than I’d have expected from such a little guy, but nothing I can’t handle. Seriously guys, you know I’ve been religiously training again ever since I came back from space, one possibly unstable fan isn’t anything that could get me down!” 

“Maybe he’s just a normal guy that really wants an autograph but is too polite to disturb you while you’re dining?” Videl suggested. “I’ve ran into those sorts with my father. They might seem weird but they’re just really devoted!” 

“Maybe, but sports fans tend to be a bit different from world tournament fans,” Yamcha said, fighting the urge to look over his shoulder and out the window. 

“You certainly had more than your fair share of fangirls back in your own professional martial artist days,” Bulma said, rolling her eyes. “Hey wait, maybe your stalker is one of those! I mean, if you look at ‘em aren’t they a bit androgynous? Could be a girl.” 

“I dunno about that, having held him for a sec and heard his voice it sure seemed like he was presenting as male, but I try not to make assumptions,” Yamcha said, popping a few of his long neglected fries into his mouth. 

“Could still be one of those sorts of fans, the sort that thinks they’re in love with you,” Krillin teased. 

Yamcha shrugged. “That wouldn’t be too bad. He was cute.” 

“Huh, I never realized you liked men, Yamcha,” Gohan commented. Bulma and Krillin burst out laughing. 

“Clearly you’ve never gone out drinking with him and Tien!” Both men in question flinched, blushed, and looked in opposite directions. 

“Look, I’ll admit I’m like, ninety percent straight, but when it comes down to it attraction is more about looks and personalities for me and less about the dangly bits,” Yamcha answered. 

“I can respect that,” Videl said seriously, “but this guy still seems dodgy.” 

“I didn’t say I was gonna go propose marriage! I just said he was cute!” 

“Ya know what?” Krillin peaked back out the window, “He kinda looks like a human Frieza. Like, how short he is, and how pale, and that purple hair?” 

“You’re totally right!” Gohan agreed. Tien nodded as well. 

Puar gave Yamcha a concerned look. While Krillin, 18, Vegeta, and Bulma all knew that he’d met up with Frieza in space, Yamcha had only told the full story, complete with it’s almost romance, to his tiny best friend. But he forced himself to act normal. 

“It’s pretty hard to imagine Frieza without the tail and the genocidal tendencies but I guess maybe he’d look a little like that?” He chuckled nervously. 

Their waitress returned to the table. “Alright, did anyone save room for dessert?” 

Outside, Frieza waited, staring at the business he’d seen the Yamcha-ish person go into. He could just vaguely see the silhouettes of what he assumed was his target and whoever he was meeting with through the rain streaked window, so he waited, wondering when they’d leave. With the statue’s power being the only explanation that made sense for what had happened it implied this person must be his prince, but why wasn’t he an Icejin? 

Balance had been a continuing problem for Frieza, but using the umbrella as a cane had partially solved the issue. Still it left him at the mercy of the rain, and while he disliked the way his clothing hung heavily around him it was initially comforting to cool down the unfamiliarly high body temperature of this form. As time passed his inability to stop shivering became a serious annoyance, but he continued to prioritize stability over dryness. Stupid warm blooded mammal body…

Warm… Yamcha(?) had felt so warm when he saved him earlier. He wanted to feel it again. It was a shame he could barely see him now- he’d been too stunned to get a good look in their brief time reunited but even as a mammal he hadn’t seemed half bad. Possibly… possibly even gorgeous.

He continued to wait, and eventually his patience was rewarded as the group got up and filtered outside, lead by… him. The group paused in the entryway, arranging their coats and talking, but he only had eyes for Yamcha as he stepped away from the others and out into the rain, heading straight for Frieza.

The emperor felt his heart quicken. This was it. Time to get the answers he’d been so desperate to find for the last few months. He’d take advantage of his temporary appearance and get close to this person, and finally know the truth. 

“Hey!” His target crossed the road and approached him. This time Frieza made sure to get a proper look… yes, those were definitely the same scars. His body too… still tall, fit, and appealingly buff. But the hair… that was a huge difference. It was long and wild and currently soaked as the two men stood out in the rain. 

If anything, this better look might have given him the proof he needed. This was definitely his prince- they were both ridiculously, impossibly handsome. 

“I uh, couldn’t help but notice you’ve been out here in this weather the whole time… were you waiting for me?” 

And that voice… that gorgeous, emphatic voice was the same too. He hoped his own wouldn’t give it away. At least he had the advantage in that Yamcha wouldn’t be expecting him in another body… “Yes, you are correct. Your brave actions saved me earlier, but I was so shaken by the encounter that I was immensely rude instead of thanking you properly.” 

Yamcha smiled down at the other man. He really did resemble a human Frieza, not just physically but with his smooth voice and refined manner of speaking. “Oh, don’t worry about it. I couldn’t let you get flattened, and I can’t blame you at all for lashing out in a panic. I’m super tough so you didn’t hurt me or anything! Anyway after you’ve been waiting this long I’m guessing you want an autograph-“ 

The wind picked up for a moment, and without thinking Frieza wrapped his arms around himself, shivering hard. The emperor was actually alarmed by it- he rarely got sick and had never been more than mildly inconvenienced by bad weather, so having his body act against his wishes like that was downright frightening. 

“Geez, this is why you shouldn’t be standing out in the rain! At least use that umbrella I gave you.” 

“I’m fine-“ another violent gust of wind pulled at his soaked clothing, and he lost balance again, but before he could hit the ground he felt the same warm arms encircle him for the second time that day. 

“You are definitely not fine. We gotta get you dry! Do you live near here?” 

“Not even close,” Frieza replied, leaning against Yamcha’s body. So warm, and he could feel his firm muscles through his damp clothing… mammal Yamcha truly seemed as physically appealing as the Icejin version had been… 

“Okay, you cool with me taking you to my place then? My apartment isn’t too far from here. Can you walk?”

“Of course I can walk,” he replied testily, stepping reluctantly away from Yamcha and following him in slow, shaky strides. 

Back at the entrance of the restaurant the rest of the group watched as their friend turned back to them, gave them a thumbs up, then walked off with his stalker. “I sure hope he knows what he’s doing,” Tien commented. 

“I should go with them to be sure!” Puar started to fly over, but Bulma held up her hand. 

“Yamcha said he wanted you to stay with us in case this guy was dangerous, we should respect that.” 

Krillin sighed. “So how long before we get a call from him saying this guy stole some of his hair and tried to clone him or something?” 

\- - - 

“Okay, we’re here! I gotta set you down for a sec so I can get the door alright?” Yamcha asked. 

After a few more falls and a lot of unsteady steps had hindered their progress Frieza wound up finishing the trip curled up in the taller man’s arms. “Fine then. I can stand at least even if I’m temporarily having a bit of trouble walking.” 

A moment later they were inside. The heater was running and felt amazing… Frieza finally relaxed a bit. 

“I can’t believe I brought you all the way to my place without doing this but I guess we should have a proper introduction, huh?” The real human held out his hand. “As you know, I’m Yamcha. And you?” 

Frieza took his hand and shook it. “It’s a pleasure, Yamcha. My name is…” While he had been waiting in the rain he’d thought of a cover story, but hadn’t considered that particularly obvious detail. So he tossed out the first thing that came to mind that wasn’t a traditional Icejin name. “…Shiraz.” 

“Like the wine? Nice to meet you, Shiraz. Now let’s get dried off, follow me.” With some trouble he managed to walk by himself to the bathroom, where Yamcha gave him a towel. 

It was a moment so similar to the last night he’d spent with his Yamcha that he had to remind himself not to get distracted by emotions. At least it seemed he’d finally be getting his closure. 

Watching his strange guest continue to shiver even now that he was out of the rain the taller man sighed. “We’ve gotta get you out of those wet clothes… and maybe you should take a shower to warm back up?”

“I agree with your thinking, my dear Yamcha,” Frieza replied. 

Yamcha felt his heart jump. Not only did this guy have to look and sound like his lost crush, but he even used the same endearment? He excused himself and rushed to his bedroom, reminding himself as he looked through his clothes that this wasn’t Frieza. It was a stranger. Probably shouldn’t have brought him home like this. And yet… 

He seemed so much like him… he couldn’t help but feel something. 

After digging out an old set of pajamas that were a little too small for him but might sorta fit his guest he headed back to the bathroom. “I’ll toss your clothes over the heater to dry, for now once you’re done showering you can wear-“ the end of the sentence was lost as he stepped into the room and saw Shiraz had already mostly undressed and was now in just his underwear. 

Frieza noticed Yamcha was staring. Oh right, come to think of it whatever culture this was it’s people did seem to mostly stay covered in clothing. He was so used to being nude ny default that he’d nearly forgotten some races normalized modesty. But from the way his host was looking at him… 

Realizing he was leering like some kind of pervert, Yamcha quickly looked away and set down the clothing. “Sorry for staring, I just wasn’t expecting you to be so fit!” It wasn’t just that he was ‘fit.’ Shiraz’s petite, trim body was muscular, with a slender waist and thick thighs… much like a certain someone whom he’d been incredibly attracted to and then forced to leave. “Anyway I’ll be in the other room if you need anything!” 

Returning to the living room and flipping on the TV Yamcha tried to calm his pounding heart. His friends were right, it was probably a bad idea to be interacting with someone that seemed like a stalker, but he couldn’t help himself. While he’d returned to a somewhat normal life, he couldn’t move past the relationship that almost was. 

…he just missed Frieza so much… 

Back in the bathroom the faux human finished undressing and stepped into the shower, fiddling a bit with it’s slightly unfamiliar control. He couldn’t figure out how to get the actual showerhead to work but the water was filling the bathtub, so he cranked up the heat and relaxed into it as it slowly filled. Finally feeling comfortable again, he looked down at his changed body, running his hands over it as he cleaned up. Despite his visible muscles he still felt so weak. He leaned back, fully submerging himself, then sat back up coughing. Okay, apparently this form needed to breathe the atmosphere… What an obnoxious limitation. 

The weirdest part of his body was certainly the genitalia. Do all mammals have it exposed all the time like this? Seems primitive. Maybe next time he fought Goku he’d aim a kick between his legs and see what happened. 

He’d once thought Son Goku was the most frustratingly attractive mammal he’d ever encounter, but this version of Yamcha had him beat. There were plenty of similarities between the two- like their builds and long dark hair. But Yamcha was slightly taller and less bulky, and the way his long hair hung down framed his handsome face and emphasized his powerful shoulders. Plus he lacked that disgusting scent that Saiyans had, and no one could compete with him when it came to eyes… much like the Icejin he’d first been so enchanted by, his eyes were filled with warmth and kindness and a mischievousness that perfectly matched his vibrant, wild personality. 

And of course he was much, much smarter than that idiot Goku. 

But he refused to let himself be blinded by sentimentality at this point. This was his chance to find out who Yamcha really was, if any of what he’d came to know was real. If he’d been treacherous, working against Frieza the whole time. If the feelings they’d shared meant anything. And of course the baffling mystery of why his Icejin prince was suddenly a mammal. While he still wasn’t sure of the right avenue to ask these questions, he would figure it out. 

He ran his hands over his own muscles again. He felt weak compared to his old self, but perhaps by the standards of whatever he was now he was still exceptional, to a relative degree at least? Perhaps he could use that to his advantage, and beat the truth out of this version of Yamcha… 

…he knew he couldn’t bring himself to try before he even finished that thought. “Not only is my body weak, but my resolve as well? Pathetic…” he muttered to himself. 

Draining the bath he dried off and dressed in the clothing he’d been lent. Glancing in the mirror he froze, finally getting a good look at himself. “This… is me?” He used his fingertips to comb back the longer hairs on top of his head and glared at his reflection. “Too weird… and my eyes…” They were almost more of a reddish brown than their usual bright crimson. 

He opened the cabinet over the sink but only found a jar of hair gel, something called ‘shaving creme,’ and a half full tube of toothpaste. Under the sink he found a dusty assortment of cleaning products, some spare bottles of ‘shampoo and conditioner,’ whatever the heck that was, and finally, at the very back, what he’d been hoping to find- cosmetics. The stuff appeared to be cheap- garish, waxy paints and odd things like fake fangs. Maybe for a costume? But more importantly, there was a single, very dusty, dark eye pencil. 

He tested it on his finger, but anything more than a slight pressure made the lead crumble. Seemed to be ancient. With the lightest touch he could manage he carefully lined his eyes and filled in his lips. There, at least now he felt a little like himself.

Time to head back out and face Yamcha… As if walking wasn’t difficult enough the oversized clothing he’d been lent gave him another trip hazard. 

Hearing the bathroom door, Yamcha sat up and tried not to be distracted by how cute tiny Shiraz looked in those pajamas. “Your clothes should be dry soon. How are you feeling?” 

Frieza smiled. That was his Yamcha, always so attentive to his needs. “I’m feeling much better, thank you for the hospitality.” He carefully made his way to the couch and sat down on the opposite side from the other man. 

“Uh, excuse my bluntness here, but is something wrong with your legs? Why can’t you walk right? Should I bring you to a doctor?” Yamcha asked. 

The time spent waiting in the rain had given him plenty of time to think up plausible lies. “I believe it’s a result of a recent traumatic injury. My balance seems to slowly be returning with practice but recovery is a journey, isn’t it? But I do not believe I need a physician at this point.” 

“Ouch, that sucks!” Yamcha replied. “Once your clothes are done I can call a car for you or carry you home if you’d like. I don’t want to make you walk back in the rain in your condition!” 

“I appreciate the offer, but alas, the same injury seems to have given me some sort of amnesia. I can not remember where I live, only that it isn’t in this city.” 

“Do you have an ID or anything that could give you a hint?” 

“Nothing but the clothes that were on my back.” 

“Wow, seriously?” Yamcha stood up and grabbed his phone. “It’s okay, one of my friends is a cop, I bet he can pull up your info in a snap-“ 

“Wait!” Frieza leaned back, attempting to look casual after his outburst. “To be perfectly straightforward…” he bit his lip, and Yamcha felt his heart speed up again, “I’m not fully certain I’m a law abiding citizen, considering my inability to remember any details of my past. I’d hate to be arrested for crimes I can’t remember committing… I fear I’m being rude, asking for yet another favor when you’ve already shown me such excessive kindness, but can I stay here for the night, and try to figure out the rest in the morning?” 

Cute, sexy, potentially questionable morals, and he looked and sounded like Frieza? Of course Yamcha wasn’t about to kick him out. “Alright, I guess I don’t have much choice at this point huh?” He tossed him the tv remote and stood up. “I’ll be right back. Feel free to find something you wanna watch.” 

Frieza looked at the remote for a moment, not knowing what any of the buttons did and unable to read the text under them. He set it down and pulled his legs up against his chest, trying for a moment to do the same with his tail then being jolted by the reminder that he no longer had one. He was still uncomfortably cold. After a moment of failing to use his Ki to warm up he grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch… Much better. 

Things seemed to be going well. Yamcha had no idea who he really was, and was all too happy to provide him this opportunity to get close. He half watched the screen, which seemed to be showing some sort of athletic event, and half watched the door to the other room. The event was interrupted a few moments later by a loud advertisement proclaiming “Does your home look dated? You need new furniture! Drop by any of our stores for the greatest deals on Earth!” 

Earth?! So that’s where they were… he looked down at his body again. Did this mean he was a human now? Ugh. No wonder he felt so powerless… 

In the kitchen, Yamcha was going through his liquor cabinet. Back on Earth he’d mostly returned to his old preferences of whiskey and beer, but high quality red wine made him nostalgic. He kept a few bottles on hand for the times when his memories overtook him and he wanted to feel connected to his old flame in some way. He wondered if Shiraz liked it… with a name like that he either loved it or hated it. After taking a quick inventory he stepped back into the doorway. “You want anything to drink? I’ve got coffee or hot chocolate, or if you prefer alcohol I’ve got a decent beer and whiskey selection and some red wine-“ 

“The wine would be perfect, thank you for your continued hospitality.” 

He brought the bottle and two glasses out and sat back on the couch. “You know, you remind me so much of someone I used to know.”

This was a promising conversation topic. “Do I now?” 

“Uh huh. Similar looks with your builds and coloring, and he really loved red wine. He’s the one that got me drinking it actually.” 

“I see,” Frieza replied, “but you say you ‘used’ to know him? What happened?” 

Yamcha wasn’t sure he was really ready to talk about that. “I… I fucked up and made a mess between us.” 

So close to what he wanted to know! Frieza pressed for more information. “How so?” 

“Eh, I don’t really want to get into such a depressing topic right now.” 

Before anything else could be asked both men were distracted when a familiar face suddenly appeared on the television. “For tonight’s ‘Baseball’s Greatest Superstars’ segment we’ll be highlighting one of the most skilled and versatile players to ever throw a ball, the Taitan who was just as well known for his record smashing-“ 

“Oh geez this is embarrassing,” Yamcha cringed, grabbing the remote and shutting it off. 

“That was you, wasn’t it? What was that about?” Frieza asked. 

“Huh? Wait, you aren’t a fan? I assumed since you knew my name…” 

Realizing he’d made a mistake, the faux human searched his memories, found something workable, and desperately hoped at least this tidbit from the other man’s past wasn’t a lie. He met Yamcha’s suspicious gaze and replied, “I saw you fight many years ago in a tournament. You made quite an impression on me I suppose.” 

“Seriously? Dang, it’s been ages since anyone remembered me for that,” he chuckled a bit, embarrassed. “I know my tournament showings weren’t exactly the greatest, I never managed to win-“ 

Here Frieza could be honest. “Oh hush. The outcome didn’t matter. The way you fight is fascinating. I’ve never seen anyone that moves like you do.” 

“Really? Thanks,” Yamcha knew he was blushing but there wasn’t much he could do about it. Shiraz was just so much like his emperor, and every bit as attractive…

The human version of his prince was just as endearing as the original, and quite possibly sexier. Frieza longed for a return to the casual intimacy they had shared in their prior bodies. 

The silence was growing awkward, so Yamcha filled it with an easy question. “Warmed back up yet? I can crank up the heater for you if you want.” 

“Yes, that would be splendid.” 

He got back up raised the thermostat. Unlike his companion he hadn’t spent an hour standing in the pouring rain, so he unbuttoned the long sleeved white shirt he’d been wearing and sat back down on the couch in just his undershirt. 

Frieza’s attention was immediately on Yamcha’s body, as the undershirt was tight, thin, and sleeveless. But then his eyes locked on something even more distracting. “On your wrist, is that…?” 

“This?” Yamcha held up his arm, smiling fondly at the band of rose gold metal he was wearing. “It was a gift from someone… someone really special to me. I never take it off.” 

For that moment the emperor wanted to forget that they were in different forms, to forget all his suspicions… 

He just wanted what they almost had. 

Sliding across the couch he leaned against the taller man’s side, closing his eyes and resting his head against Yamcha’s chest. “I was still cold. Is this alright?” 

“Huh?” He stared down at him, then smiled, feeling a little overwhelmed as he pulled the blanket around them both and held him close. “Yeah, this is totally alright.” 

Maybe he’d never have a chance to find out if he could really have made things work with Frieza, but maybe… he could have the next best thing? 

End Chapter Eleven: Perfect Strangers Meet Again

Author’s Note: 

One thing I struggle with is putting too much of my own opinions into the mouths of the characters I write when it comes to ‘political’ topics- I mention that here because we have Yamcha being relatively open minded on gender issues with the line “I dunno about that, having held him for a sec and heard his voice he seemed like he was presenting as male, but I try not to make assumptions.” I’d personally like to think he would be just because I like to think the best of Yamcha, but as the canon Dragon Ball universe unfortunately doesn’t have the most progressive track record regarding LGBTQ issues so who knows. 

That aside, our boys have been reunited, only this time it’s Frieza hiding behind a fake identity… And the old chemistry is back STRONG. But next chapter poor Frieza gets the biggest shock of his life when he realizes the man he’d been developing feelings for… HAS MORALS?!


	12. Looking Better than the Night Before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frieza and Yamcha go diving head first into a relationship at last, but the faux human still has a lot to learn not only about fitting in to Earth's culture, but also about the man he's falling for...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Twelve: Looking Better Than The Night Before

This was a reoccurring dream. Back in space, the night they’d spent dancing, then talking, then laying close in bed… But when Yamcha woke up this time he was momentarily disoriented as the dream hadn’t fully seemed to end- 

His mind finally pulled it all back together as he opened his eyes. Right… Shiraz. The two men had fallen asleep on the couch. He hadn’t even really been that tired, but holding his strange guest had felt so peaceful and relaxing… 

Shiraz was still unconscious, half way on Yamcha’s lap. The blanket around them had shifted a bit but he seemed to finally be feeling better- no more shivering. 

What an odd guy… waiting out in the rain like that, barely able to stand, and of course the amnesia… Looked so much like Frieza, too. 

Considering what he himself had recently been through… could this possibly be Frieza in another body? Had he wished for a change of form much like Yamcha accidentally had? No, that couldn’t be it. He and his friends kept close tabs on the Dragon Balls, they’d been used too recently for Earth’s set to have been used again. The resettled Namekians were hidden from Frieza’s forces, and of course there’s no way they would have just allowed him use of their balls. Besides, his emperor had caught many of his lies, but he’d never completely figured things out. He’d have had no way of knowing Yamcha was on Earth. As suspicious as Shiraz was, he just couldn’t be Frieza. 

Maybe this was fate’s way of trying to heal his heart? To offer him a less problematic alternative? …he wanted to believe that, at least. 

He just wanted to be able to give his heart to someone amazing, was that really so much to ask?

Carefully, trying not to wake him, he moved one arm so he could grab his phone from where it had been left on the arm of the couch and checked the time- a little before midnight. Wow, they’d somehow slept for hours… 

From here Yamcha wasn’t exactly sure how to proceed… between his time out in the weather and the injury that had taken his balance and memory it seemed Shiraz really needed the sleep, but half sitting on the couch probably wasn’t the best way to do it. He took another look at his phone while he tried to make a decision- 

Countless texts from his friends had came in over the last couple hours, mostly joking about his stalker stealing his underwear or installing hidden cameras around his apartment. They were kinda funny, but also a good reminder that taking in a stranger probably hadn’t been the best of ideas… 

Looking back down at the incredibly strange yet also incredibly appealing man in his arms was all it took for him to push that back out of his mind. He shut his phone off and then, as delicately as he could, lifted Shiraz and stood up. He was so tiny, but heavier than he looked thanks to having some muscle… for what seemed like the hundredth time he was vividly reminded of Frieza. He figured he’d go put him in the bed so he could get some proper sleep, and Yamcha himself would take the couch. Probably for the best that they separate for a bit anyway, as his body had made it embarrassingly clear how much it liked having Shiraz on his lap. 

\- - - 

This was a reoccurring dream. His hands covered in Saiyan blood as he laughed down at the lifeless bodies of Goku and Vegeta, then he’s up in the air high above their wretched planet, sending down a massive ball of energy to completely destroy it- 

Wait. WAIT! NO! Yamcha was down there!

He woke up in a panic from the dream and disoriented by his unfamiliar body and thrashed hard- 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’ve got you!” Warm, strong, familiar arms held him close and Frieza’s eyes opened to see the concerned face of his prince- 

\- not his prince. This other Yamcha. His pulse still racing from the nightmare he covered his face, embarrassed. “I… I apologize. That’s the second time I’ve accidentally attacked you.” 

“It’s cool. I get bad dreams when I’m sick, too-“ 

“I was not having bad dreams and I’m not sick-“ he looked away- and finally realized they were no longer on the couch but instead in what appeared to be a bedroom. “…oh.”

Whoops. Yamcha quickly dropped Shiraz onto the bed and stepped back. “Sorry, sorry, I was just trying to let you continue sleeping, you seemed like you really needed it, I wasn’t gonna try and make a move on you or anything!” 

Frieza had fantasized so many times at this point about being thrown into the sheets by Yamcha… “Sleep is likely the best option, but I’m not entirely sure I’d be able to relax at the moment…” 

“Oh, I can totally help with that!” Yamcha enthusiastically replied, “I’m really good at giving massages, actually!” 

Massages… that brought back some very, very pleasant memories. Frieza’s temporary body once again responded in a way he couldn’t control as he could feel his face burning as well as a prickling between his legs. Embarrassed he quickly laid down on his stomach and turned his face away from his gorgeous former assistant. “Your continued kindness is much appreciated. You may place your hands on me.” 

Now it was Yamcha’s turn to feel a bit worked up as he knelt on the side of the bed next to Shiraz. The same memories were coming back to him as well, and thinking about those intimate nights with Frieza never failed to arouse him. It didn’t help that his body had already been responding to his closeness to Shiraz on the couch several minutes ago. Still, he tried to push all that out of his mind. This was to help someone in need, not to get himself off. He put his hands on the smaller man’s shoulders and got to work. 

It felt so different in this human form… Frieza shut his eyes and concentrated on the feeling of Yamcha’s touch. This version of his prince was clearly still fairly strong, for a human at least, and the pressure he was using was almost too much at first. But Yamcha seemed to pick up on the little body language hints that this was the case and let up slightly, after which it began to feel every bit as amazing as he remembered. 

So like him, Icejin or mammal… always so observant and ready to fulfill his lord’s needs before Frieza could even speak them. He smiled a bit at that. 

Yamcha moved his hands down from Shiraz’s shoulders to his upper back, and continued working his way down. It was a little like massaging Frieza had been, with the similar shapes of their bodies, but Shiraz’s skin and muscle were noticeably warmer and more supple even through the fabric of his shirt… still very nice to touch though. As his motions grew closer to his waist both men were reminded of an even bigger difference- no tail. 

It was strange for Frieza, being touched in what had once been one of the more sensitive spots of his body yet feeling nothing out of the usual. 

Well, nothing was probably an oversimplification… Yamcha’s hands were still exciting, and oddly reassuring. And somehow, even without whatever nerves had made the area around the base of his tail so sensitive it was still somehow erotic being touched in that particular spot… He took a deep breath…

Damn it all, he knew what he wanted. He sat up, and despite feeling that uncomfortable sort of heat in his face, hesitantly spoke. “I know you said you weren’t planning on making a move on me, but I’d… I’d like it if you did. Please, my Yamcha, make a move on me.” 

He had to be a crazy fan… who talked like that to someone they’d just met? But… there was too much built up desire and longing for the two most gorgeous men Yamcha had ever met, mixing and becoming inseparable from one another in his mind. This was a bad idea but there was no way he wasn’t going for it. “If you’re serious…” 

His eyes coming to rest on the unmissable bulge in the front of Yamcha’s pants, Frieza nodded. “Very serious. It looks like you are, as well.” 

Following his gaze downward and realizing just how obvious his body was making his willingness, Yamcha laughed awkwardly. His captivating guest laid back in front of him, everything in his body language completely inviting. It was enough to make his mouth water… “Are you one hundred percent sure you’re feeling up to this?”

“I told you, I’m not sick. Just cold…” 

“I think… this will help you warm up then,” Yamcha’s words lost their power, along with his breath, as he slid his hands up the smaller man’s stomach, chest, and arms, pushing his oversized pajama top off in the process. “Damn… You’re gorgeous.” 

The faux human sat up, grabbed the bottom hem of Yamcha’s thin undershirt, and pulled it over his head. While it hadn’t left much to the imagination, and he’d seen his Icejin form shirtless more times than he could count, he still treated his eyes to a long, lingering look at his host’s newly exposed body. “As are you…” 

They both laid back down, and ‘Shiraz’ finally did something he’d been craving all evening- he ran his fingers through Yamcha’s hair. It was thick, and soft, and still just slightly damp from the rain earlier. He did this several times, slowly, almost reverentially- it was doing everything for him. “I absolutely adore your hair.”

“Heh, thanks,” Yamcha replied, pulling him close enough that their bare chests were pressed together. Geez, Shiraz was so endearing, yet so weird, practically acting like he’d never seen long hair before. It was flattering though, and the attention felt good. 

Frieza was lost. He still didn’t understand this change in his prince. He still didn’t know what had really happened between them in the past, or how authentic any of it was. And he most certainly didn’t know how he felt… He just wanted… he wasn’t even sure what. “My Yamcha… I…” 

“Yeah?” 

One hand still in the taller man’s hair, the other arm wrapped around him, he pulled him close, closed his eyes, and kissed him. Despite the physical intimacy they were sharing it still caught Yamcha off guard, but he smiled a little and returned it with equal enthusiasm. Shiraz had nice lips… 

After a few blissful moments they separated, and he was surprised to see the beginning of tears in the smaller man’s eyes. 

Frieza was just as surprised, and quickly wiped them away. “I’m not usually… sentimental,” he felt obligated to explain, blushing heavily and completely disgusted with himself, “Or this easily flustered. It’s this… situation, or this odd, pathetic body-“ 

Oh right, Yamcha had almost forgotten Shiraz had been terribly injured in whatever incident had cost him his memory and balance, maybe this was a bad idea. Disappointed, but understanding, he pulled back a few inches, “right, I forgot about that, sorry. I’ll let you get some more rest-“ 

“No!” Frieza grabbed his lover, hiding his face against his neck. “I don’t want to lose this. I know I barely know you, and I have no idea who you really are, but… I’ve dreamed of this. Won’t you give me a chance?” 

How could he say no? “For what it’s worth, I don’t normally bring strangers home for hook ups, but uh… You’re really hot, and I’m not thinking with my brain right now.” He pushed Shiraz onto his back and grabbed the loose elastic waistband of his several-sizes-too-big pajama pants, pulling it down. He’d omitted the underwear, apparently. Yamcha kissed his neck and reached between his lover’s legs… 

\- - - 

Late the following morning, both men stood in front of the bathroom sink, Frieza trying to look casual and avoid making his scrutiny obvious as he watched Yamcha shave his face. This seemed dangerous, running blades over his weak, human skin… strange custom in general too. Why only shave this specific part of the face and not all that irritating hair? Well, then again, he was glad Yamcha left as much hair as he did… the stuff on his head was lovely. 

Using a spare razor he’d been given he carefully imitated Yamcha’s motions as he shaved his own face. Waking up with stubble had been distressing, to say the least. This body confused him and he didn’t like it. But… 

He took another look up at his host, this time not to learn his shaving technique, but instead to admire the whole of him, from that wild head of hair he couldn’t get enough of to his handsome face and sexy physique… It wasn’t fair how he was somehow so attractive in this underpowered body… 

Sharing physical passion with Yamcha had been everything Frieza had dreamt it would be. It should have came as no surprise that his hard working, dedicated assistant was an incredibly willing, attentive and devoted lover. But he still wasn’t fully satisfied… he wanted to do these things- and more- in his true body. 

Yamcha noticed the eyes on him but tried to stay nonchalant. After the final few swipes of his razor, he rinsed the blade, wiped his face and, as casually as he could muster, asked, “So, um, Shiraz, remember I said I don’t do hook ups?” 

Frieza nodded. “Of course…” there was an inescapable nervousness, even after the prior night… maybe especially after it. He’d been vulnerable… too emotional. As good as it had been it had been a little humiliating for the faux human, too. “It doesn’t have to be that.” 

“I was thinking the same thing…” Yamcha leaned against the sink, grinning at his bizarre houseguest. As suspicious as Shiraz’s actions had been, well, if he was a stalker fan, he was a damn cute and seemingly harmless one… “Wanna date or something?” 

“Yes!” Frieza replied, perhaps too quickly. He was embarrassed again, then irritated at himself for the constant barrage of emotional weaknesses he seemed to be finding in himself since switching forms… Were all humans like this? Or was it just how he reacted to Yamcha? He grabbed the towel and wiped his own face, as much to hide his anything awkward his expression might be showing as to get rid of the excess shaving creme. 

“Good,” Yamcha hugged him for a moment. The way he fit in his arms… it was perfect. 

Like how Frieza had fit. 

If this was his second chance at romance with a partner that seemed so much like the man he’d thought was ideal, well, he’d be a fool not to take it. 

“So I’m thinking you can stay with me until you recover from that injury? I don’t mind taking care of you, I mean, it’s probably obvious but I like you a lot,” he laughed, “And once your memory is back we can figure out things from there, sound good?” 

“You have my gratitude, my dear Yamcha,” Frieza replied. He held his new boyfriend’s arm for stability as they returned to the bedroom and went to the closet. 

Pulling out some clothing for himself, Yamcha continued, “I’m gonna try and find something that will fit you… your outfit from yesterday might be beyond saving. It’s got a lot of rips and stains from when you kept falling over outside.” 

“Is it absolutely necessary that I wear clothes?” 

Misunderstanding what was an honest question and assuming it was an attempt at flirting, the taller man just winked and went back to work. A minute later he tossed a garment bag at Shiraz, who caught it, nearly lost his balance again, then recovered. “There, my old Yukata. I think it might fit, should be at least a little more forgiving than most things since it wraps around… We can pin up the bottom if it comes down to that. Once we’re dressed I’ll get you breakfast and then we can go buy you some essentials, like clothing that’s actually your size, okay?” 

As Yamcha pulled on some pants and a casual shirt Frieza hesitantly donned the yukata. Thankfully it wasn’t too dissimilar to an outfit he’d worn in the past- his first proper day working with his prince, come to think of it. He smiled a bit at the memory. 

Dressed at last the two men left the apartment, the umbrella from the prior day once again being employed as a walking tool. “There’s a shopping center about a block away, we can grab some food at the coffee shop there then hit the clothings stores.” Yamcha wasn’t worried about the fact that Shiraz didn’t have a wallet… there was a little secret he’d been keeping from everyone except Puar… 

He’d came back from space a very, very wealthy man. 

Unlike his time in public the prior day, Frieza was now aware that he was on Earth, and that knowledge put him on edge. He’d of course researched the planet in the past, and knew it had a large population. The likelihood of running into the Saiyans or their associates was low… but that didn’t stop him from constantly scanning the streets for any unpleasantly familiar faces. This body might be allowing him a chance to get close to Yamcha and finally find the answers he was so desperate for, but as weak as it was he had no interest in a confrontation while he was stuck in it. 

Breakfast was a bit awkward- Frieza couldn’t read the menu, and had no idea what the pastries(?) in the countertop display case were. Of course he couldn’t make this obvious without blowing his cover, so he insisted Yamcha order first, then just asked for the same. 

So this was Earth food? He wasn’t impressed. The drink was bitter and the food too sweet… 

As they left the coffee shop a few minutes later, Yamcha offered, “I’m actually a pretty decent chef, if you want I can make a bunch of different things for you tonight, maybe something will jog your memory of what you actually like eating?” 

His prince cooked? Frieza’d had no idea. Of course, he’d learned so much- and had so many new questions as a result- about Yamcha in the short time they’d been reunited that he doubted anything could surprise him at this point. 

The shopping center had a multitude of clothing stores, and they headed into a large one. “I guess a department store is the best bet since since we’re gonna have to get you, well, everything. I know you’ll need at least a week’s worth of clothing for regular wear, and looking at that sexy body of yours it’s obvious you must work out so I’ll get you some gym clothes too. Oh, and underwear and socks and all that too I guess. So just… grab what you like and we’ll go from there, cool?” 

Frieza looked around the sprawling store in front of him and sighed. He really would prefer to just stay nude, but that didn’t seem to be an option if he was trying to blend in in this culture. With no idea what was really considered normal or appropriate he did the only thing he could and simply started touching fabric. 

Yamcha held out his arms and allowed his boyfriend to drape whatever caught his eyes over them. Shiraz seemed hardly concerned with specific styles but instead just seemed drawn to certain colors and textures. Expensive fabrics were definitely his thing- lots of silky, elegant shirts, and he took one look at the many pairs of jeans available, touched the denim, and immediately made a face and left that section. He even grabbed a couple dresses- Yamcha supposed he shouldn’t have been surprised, the guy liked makeup after all, clearly he wasn’t overly restricted by gender norms. 

That also reminded him that they should likely swing by the makeup counter while they were here… 

Once his arms were full they headed to the changing rooms so Shiraz could actually try all this on. The attendant at the entrance greeted them- then frowned when he noticed the massive pile of clothing Yamcha was carrying. 

“Oh, I’m very sorry but we only allow five garments in the changing room at a time-“ Frieza rolled his eyes and waved him away, but he stepped in front of them. “Store policy sirs. You can’t-“ 

“I don’t think you’re in any position to be telling us what we can and can’t do,” the faux human replied. It was clear even without a scouter that this employee was a weakling- even in his current significantly less powerful body he’d be able to take him down without trouble. He missed the clean elegance of his Death Beam, but oh well, he’d make due. He raised a fist- 

Yamcha quickly stepped between them. “What my boyfriend is trying to say is, as you may have noticed, he has a disability. Walking is very difficult for him. It would make things like, a thousand times easier for us if we could bring all the clothes in at once so he doesn’t have to keep walking back out here to get more. I’m sure your managers would be fine with you making an exception for us with that in mind!” 

“Uh, sure,” the attendant stepped back, and the two men entered a dressing room. 

“Was that necessary?” Frieza asked, sitting on a bench inside the room. “It would have been much quicker to just teach him to mind his own business…” 

Yamcha hung up the clothes he’d been carrying and turned to the other man, crossing his arms. “Are you serious? We can’t just pick a fight in the middle of a store!” 

“Why not? We’d have easily won, especially working together. I’ve seen your strength and skill before, remember.” 

“…you really are serious.” Yamcha sighed. “When you said you didn’t want me trying to get a cop to help you I thought you were half joking about possibly being a criminal, but now… maybe you were right. Um, while we’re still trying to get your memories back, no violence, okay?” 

Frieza had meant it when he had previously assumed nothing could surprise him at this point, but he’d been wrong. 

Yamcha, his dear Yamcha, the man he’d thought was perfect… was guided by morals?! A… good guy?! He heaved a sigh of his own at this point. This certainly made things more complicated… and confusing. But it didn’t change how he felt. He still wanted to know the truth, and he still wanted to have another taste of the happiness they’d came so close to… “Fine then. I’ll behave.” 

“Thanks babe,” Yamcha replied, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Now let’s get you into some of these outfits and figure out what suits you. I’m betting everything will though, considering you’re so damn good looking!” 

End Chapter Twelve: Looking Better than the Night Before

Author’s note: 

This chapter wasn’t originally in the fic, but about half way through editing/publishing I decided I wanted to expand this section, and eventually it made the prior chapter way too long so I decided to just add it as an additional one. Anyway, poor Frieza… falling for a hero XD but at least they finally broke the sexual tension so there’s that. Hopefully I didn't screw up with the rating, like I've said before I'm always unsure on that, but since this was a lot of lead up then the actual stuff happened off screen I assume it's fine. Eh, whatever.


	13. To Stand Where I Stood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frieza gets the shock of his life when he finally meets his boyfriend's friends... and unfortunately for him, everyone except Yamcha is starting to figure things out.

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Thirteen: To Stand Where I Stood

“You’re kidding me, Yamcha is seriously dating his stalker?!” Krillin was slack jawed at the news. 

“You’d better believe it,” Bulma confirmed, “and it gets crazier- he moved in with him literally the day they met!” 

“That’s nuts! I mean, I know Yamcha’s always been desperate for romance but this is ridiculous even by his standards!” 

“I fully agree. I’m betting the stalker is up to something weird and taking advantage of our buddy’s good nature,” Bulma leaned in and lowered her voice. “That’s actually the main reason I invited everyone over tonight. I wanted an excuse to see them together. He and I might not have worked out but Yamcha’s got a good heart. I’m not about to stand by while some stalker weirdo stomps on it!” 

“If that’s the case I’m in too! We’ll make sure Yamcha’s safe!” 

\- - -

Over the past two weeks Yamcha’s life had changed significantly. Since returning from space he’d been cheerful but a bit withdrawn. Now? It was like he was walking on clouds. His previously sparse bedroom was now covered in clothes and other random gifts he’d lavished on his new partner. Furthermore, the two were rarely out of touching range, a fact that a mildly jealous Puar found a little irritating. 

For Frieza, it was so easy to slip back into his prior closeness with Yamcha, except this time, safe in the knowledge that his real identity was secret, he could go all in. 

He still desired to know the truth of what had happened before, but it was hard to convince himself to chase potentially painful knowledge when he had something so good and easy now… 

Of course, today might not be so easy after all. 

“When you said we’d be going out I assumed just the two of us, but I’ll be meeting your friends?” Frieza asked, leaned over the sink as he applied the high end cosmetics Yamcha had bought for him. 

“Yep. Don’t worry, they’re gonna love you!” Yamcha replied from his spot to the right where he was combing out his hair. “Trust me, you’ll love them too.” 

He suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. With his boyfriend as the only exception he had absolutely zero interest in the boring, idiotic weaklings that made up the population of this planet. “I have my doubts, but I’ll certainly attempt to get along for your sake, my dear Yamcha.” 

“They’re a pretty strange group, so you and your quirks will fit right in!” 

“I have quirks, do I?” Frieza asked, pausing on his eyeliner to glare at his boyfriend. 

“How else would you describe it?” Yamcha answered, holding his hands up in surrender. “I mean, you have amnesia but were clearly someone well educated and cultured! You’re a mystery! A fascinating and sexy one!” 

He let his partner babble on a moment longer before sparing him, lightly jabbing him in the side. “I was only teasing. You’re adorable when you ramble.” 

Puar floated to the door frame and peeked inside. “Are you two almost ready? We’re running late!” 

“Sorry, sorry, almost there, just gotta finish dressing!” 

Back in the bedroom Yamcha dug out a t-shirt and jeans. “This is gonna be pretty casual, but… do you even own casual clothes?” 

Frieza had no idea what was considered casual in this culture. “I don’t know, you bought most of this for me, do I?” 

After a moment of tearing through the many outfits still in their shopping bags Yamcha tossed the faux human a silky, light purple short sleeved button up and the black pants from one of his many suits. “I think this is as casual as we’re gonna manage for you today. We’ll have to fix that next time we’re shopping!” 

Frieza grabbed the elegant cane he’d replaced the umbrella with- while he had improved his sense of balance quite a bit in the time he’d had to get used to this body he was still a bit unsteady when moving quickly- then they met up with Puar and headed out. 

\- - - 

The group were amongst the last to arrive at the party, and raised more than a few eyebrows both from the ones who’d been present during their initial meeting and the rest of the group. Frieza scanned the gathering quickly and was startled to see multiple familiar faces- Son Goku and the rest?! A sudden wild panic like nothing he’d ever felt before clawed inside him, making his heart race and body tense as he frantically turned to face Yamcha. 

Had this all been a setup?! 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Yamcha asked, gently taking his hands. “There’s nothing to be anxious about here.” 

Oddly… he seemed to be right. Frieza had been so certain that the group would attack him, and he’d be defenseless with this weak body and dulled mind that came along with being human. But instead where he’d expected pain and betrayal there was instead nothing but Yamcha’s kindness and affection. He took a deep breath and tried to relax again. “Oh, I just think I had a flash of a memory, that’s all. I think I’ve hosted large gatherings like this at some point. It’s always jarring when the little pieces come back.” 

“Hey, that’s awesome! Eventually you’ll get them all back, I’m sure of it,” Yamcha smiled. 

“Yeah!” Puar nodded encouragingly. 

Frieza forced a smile at them both, and nodded. “I appreciate that.” 

He’d have to watch what he said and did carefully to avoid losing his cover… But why in space was his Yamcha an associate of Earth’s heroes? He once again looked to the other side of the room where he’d seen Goku as well as Vegeta. He was relieved, yet also repulsed, to see they were currently paying no attention to the new arrivals and instead shoving food down their throats. Convenient, but still disgusting. 

For self preservation’s sake he’d have to be particularly careful around those two. This body was so infuriatingly weak… While Yamcha was occupied with work or errands he’d made a few attempts to awaken his old abilities, but even with his most immense concentration he could barely manage to float more than an inch or two off the ground, and had only produced the tiniest, most pathetic of Death Beams. Transformations of any sort, including Golden, seemed to be impossible. Possibly most vexing was this form’s affect of his intellect- even his ability to think felt slower.

For the time being, it was worth it. Even without the answers he still yearned for, it was so easy to lose himself in the sheer contentment of being back with his devoted, funny, sexy Yamcha… 

Oh, was he ever sexy! The more time he spent around his human version the more his attraction grew. He wondered if he preferred him in this form because of his own temporarily human body or if he’d think the same once he was his old self again. Either way he constantly craved the taller man… 

Still though… if Yamcha was part of this group, did that mean he’d been planning to deliver Frieza to the Saiyans for slaughter? Or had he betrayed them and been sincere in his desire to serve the emperor, and made up the back story and taken on a fake form to distance himself from that part of his past? Or perhaps he only met them after the fact? 

More pressing questions he’d need the answer to, but at least one thing seemed at last to make sense- Yamcha would have had both knowledge of the Dragon Balls and access to their tracking device. He must have used them to become an Icejin, whatever his intentions in that form were. 

He was pulled from his thoughts as a woman approached them. “Yamcha, Puar, thanks for coming! And I don’t believe we’ve been properly introduced?” 

Lifting a hand and smiling serenely, he replied, “My name is Shiraz, I’m accompanying dear Yamcha. It’s a pleasure.” 

She accepted his hand and shook it, “You’re a lot more polite than I’d have expected, Shiraz! I’m Bulma, this is my place, and that rude guy over there stuffing his face instead of greeting guests is my amazing husband, Vegeta.” 

Upon hearing who she was wed to the faux human extracted his hand from her grip and tried to be discrete as he wiped it off on his pants. “Thank you for having us, Ms. Bulma.” 

As the three headed over to grab a drink, Krillin approached Bulma and whispered, “Well? What’s he like?”

“Surprisingly normal,” She replied, scrutinizing his back as he walked away. 

“That doesn’t really click with what we saw from him before. I say we keep monitoring him. I’ll try and get him in a conversation later.” 

On the other side of the room, Frieza quietly said, “This place is massive… that woman and her gross partner really own it?” 

“From anyone else I’d be shocked that they didn’t know about Bulma and Capsule Corp, but you get the amnesia pass,” Yamcha replied. “Capsule Corp is one of the biggest technology companies in the world and Bulma and her father are the inventors that are behind all their success. She’s actually my ex, as awkward as that is. As for Vegeta, he’s uh… trouble, but not so gross once you get to know him, just got a big appetite.” 

Wait a moment. Frieza glanced back over his shoulder at Bulma. That’s the inventor girl? The one Yamcha was so close with?! He felt a sudden surge of jealousy, but pushed it down quick. She could have spent the rest of her life with the most gorgeous and most interesting man in existence but instead she chose VEGETA? Obviously she was too much of a fool to be a threat. 

Drinks in hand Yamcha found them a seat at a table with a few of their friends. “Hey guys! I’d like you to meet my wonderful boyfriend, Shiraz! Shiraz, this is Tien, Piccolo, Gohan, Videl, and their daughter, Pan.”

Other than the woman and the child Frieza knew them all, but he certainly wasn’t about to acknowledge that. “It’s a pleasure to meet all of you, any friend of Yamcha’s is a friend of mine.” 

Before anything else could be said the scrape of chairs dragged over the floor announced the arrival of Bulma and Krillin. “Hope you don’t mind if we join you!” Bulma enthused. 

“Yeah, we just couldn’t turn down a chance to get to know Yamcha’s new boyfriend!” Krillin laughed. 

Piccolo hadn’t said anything, but was giving Frieza a very piercing look. It actually made him a little nervous… the Namekian hadn’t struck Frieza as a complete idiot when they’d fought against or alongside each other. He’d have to continue to keep his guard up. 

He couldn’t let the truth come out about himself until he knew the full truth about Yamcha. 

“So Shiraz,” Gohan asked, “I don’t know if you noticed us, but we actually saw you the other day standing outside in the rain. Was that when you and Yamcha met?” 

They’d noticed? Well, that was awkward. “Indeed it was. He’d saved my life you see, and I wanted to offer him proper thanks, so I waited until I had an opportunity to do so.” 

“You saved his life?” Piccolo asked, his scrutiny unwavering. 

“Shiraz is still feeling the affects of a recent injury,” Yamcha explained, “It screwed up his balance-“ he gestured at the cane that was now leaned against the side of the table, “-and he had stumbled into the road. I saw he was about to get hit so I pulled him back onto the sidewalk.” 

“And you stood outside without cover in the pouring rain for over an hour after that?” Krillin asked doubtfully. 

“Yes.” 

“And this injury Yamcha mentioned, that sounds awful, do you mind if I asked what happened?” Bulma asked, faking concern but still suspicious. 

“Alas, I am unable to remember,” Frieza replied. 

“Yeah, it gave him amnesia,” Yamcha put an arm around the smaller man’s shoulders. “That’s part of why I’m so dedicated to taking the best care I can of him. He doesn’t know where else he could go!” 

Krillin pulled out his phone and started typing. Bulma glanced from ‘Shiraz’ to Puar and commented, “you’re certainly good at picking up a certain type of strays, huh Yamcha?” 

“But wait,” Videl asked, “Yamcha, didn’t you say he recognized you and acted like a fan?” 

Thankfully he’d prepared for this. “For whatever reason, seeing Yamcha fight in the world tournament so many years ago left a powerful impression on me. That, along with my name, are amongst my very few lingering memories.” 

Krillin looked up from his phone and snickered. “Yeah, our buddy here definitely knew how to make an impression! Was it the time he got his ass handed to him by an old man that you’re remembering? Or when Tien broke his leg?” 

“Hey, that old man turned out to be a literal god thank you very much!” Puar jumped in. 

Frieza ignored the explanation, focused instead on that other piece of information. So Tien is the friend Yamcha makes out with when he’s drunk?! He looked over at the warrior he knew briefly from both his second most recent invasion attempt and the tournament of power, then imagined him and and Yamcha in some dark corner wrapped around each other, their powerfully muscled bodies pressed close- 

-and stopped himself before he could allow his body to get too excited. 

“Well anyway, Shiraz, let’s step away for a moment. There’s someone else you’ve gotta meet,” Yamcha stood and offered his boyfriend his arm, and they left the table followed as always by Puar. 

“There’s something off about him,” Piccolo spoke after they were at a safe distance. 

“You’re right about that,” Bulma agreed, “Krillin and I have been trying to figure it out.” 

The tiny man nodded, holding up his phone. “Check this out. Since I’m a cop I have access to all the drivers licenses and ID cards registered in West City, and the only ‘Shiraz’ that showed up is listed as a six foot tall seventy year old woman, definitely not this guy.”

“Still thinking he might be some sort of stalker?” Videl asked. 

“Yeah, some creepy super fan lying about amnesia to get Yamcha to take him in-“ 

“I don’t think he’s from this planet.” 

It was such a simple statement but it had everyone at the table staring at Piccolo. “Seriously?” 

He nodded. “He’s definitely human, but there’s enough Kami in me to still have a sense for these things. I don’t know where he came from but it isn’t here.” 

Half way across the room, Yamcha was explaining, “I’m about to introduce you to one of my oldest friends. I would not be exaggerating to say this guy changed my life completely. Plus he’s the kind of guy you can rely on to always make life exciting, a real adventurer!” 

Seeing where they were walking to, Frieza fought the urge to roll his eyes. Of course he’d have to socialize with him… 

Oh no, wait a minute, if Yamcha knew Goku… Frieza cringed. That night when they’d discussed past lovers and crushes, he’d mentioned his attraction to the Saiyan assuming there was no chance his prince was familiar with the man, but he’d likely known exactly who he was describing. How humiliating… 

“Hey Goku! Got a sec?” 

The man in question stepped away from his conversation with Master Roshi and turned to the other three with a big smile on his face. “Hey Yamcha! How’s it going?” 

“So good, man. I’m the happiest I’ve been in quite a while!” He smiled down at his companion. “I wanted to make sure you two got a chance to get to know each other. Goku, this is my boyfriend, Shiraz. Shiraz, this is Goku. I’ve known him longer than anyone other than Puar, and I’m not exaggerating when I say he’s a true hero.” 

“A hero, hmm? Goodness, what an honor,” Frieza dryly replied and held out his hand. 

“Great to meet ya!” Goku shook his hand, completely oblivious to Frieza’s attempt to give it a painfully hard squeeze. “But have we met before? You seem kinda familiar.” 

“Oh I doubt it,” Frieza quickly replied, but Yamcha jumped in. 

“Maybe you have though!” He excitedly turned to his old friend. “Shiraz has amnesia. If you have met him maybe you can help trigger a return of his old memories?” 

“Hmm, let me see…” 

This was bad. Thankfully for Frieza he had a flash of brilliance worth taking a gamble on. “Wait a moment, we have met! I can remember it clearly now! It was when I was watching the world tournament! On your way into the ring I wished you luck from where I was spectating!” 

“Was that it?” Goku asked doubtfully. 

“Oh, that makes perfect sense,” Yamcha agreed. “Seeing me in the tournament was one of his few memories, I guess I wasn’t the only thing that stuck out to him that day.” 

“Yes, but I specifically remember your fight due to the brilliance of your moves,” ‘Shiraz’ said, “I think the reason Goku stood out was he looked so pitiful I thought he might die that day.” 

“Did I? Wow, no one ever told me that before.” 

Frieza watched the two men talk for a moment as they caught up on one another’s lives. It was odd… while he still felt the infuriating sense that his life was somehow tied to Son Goku’s (if anything the fact that the man he felt such affection for was a friend of the Saiyan’s just seemed to further prove this), he could hardly see why he’d ever felt an attraction to the man he so hated. Yamcha was a far more handsome version of a similar theme, and lacked that obnoxious personality that Goku had. 

“Anyway, it’s been great meeting you,” the Saiyan said, returning his attention to ’Shiraz,’ “And there’s just one more thing I’ve gotta ask… you train, don’t you?” 

“Not really-“ 

“No, don’t be modest, from what I can see of your arms and your build I can tell you’ve got some muscle!” 

“He sure does!” Yamcha proudly interjected, “he’s got a great physique!”

“Wanna spar?” 

“Of course not, I hardly have my balance back,” Frieza replied, irritated. Dumb monkey… he knew one tap from him and this current weak human form would be dead. 

“Yeah, come on Goku, Shiraz is just a regular human, he’d be no challenge to you!” As much as he knew it was the truth it still hurt to hear Yamcha say it. 

“Just one hit?” the Saiyan plead, “I won’t fight back, I just wanna see how strong this shortie is.” 

“Um, don’t call him that, he’s sensitive about his height-“ 

“Really? Cuz he looks extra extra small next to you-“ 

It was too much, and a pissed off Frieza shouted “FINE THEN!” and punched Goku straight in the gut with everything he had- then yanked his hand back, cringing. 

“See Goku, that’s why you should have left well enough alone! Come on Shiraz, I’ll get you some ice for that. I swear punching that guy is like trying to hit a steel wall…” 

As they walked away, Goku watched, his eyes narrowing… 

As the event wore on, Krillin and Bulma stood off to the side, observing Yamcha and Shiraz chatting. “Everything we’ve seen today just makes him seem all the more suspicious.” 

“You’re right about that, Krillin, but at the same time… he sure seems to make Yamcha happy, doesn’t he?” 

“Well yeah, but he’s also got him waiting on him hand and foot. It’s always our buddy grabbing them food or drinks or whatever.” 

“That’s true, but that’s actually kind of a good thing.” Bulma’s expression softened a bit as she watched them. “When it comes to the people he cares about, Yamcha is a natural caregiver. He’ll complain about it sometimes but he likes to feel needed, like you rely on him. That’s probably a big part of why he put up with me even when I was going through the most immature part of my teen years,” she paused to laugh at herself a little, then continued. “Shiraz is definitely weird and quite likely not on the level, but you see the way he’s looking at Yamcha? That at least seems sincere. And I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen Yamcha this happy. Maybe it’s okay for them to be together after all.” 

Krillin nodded. “You’d know a lot better than I do, Bulma. I’ll trust your judgement for now.” 

“I think you’re both overlooking something very obvious.” Neither of the friends had noticed Vegeta’s approach. The Saiyan glared at ‘Shiraz’ as he quietly spoke. “Considering what the three of us know about what Yamcha was really up to in space… I think this guy might more than just look like Frieza.” 

“Wait, you’re saying Shiraz is a charade?” Krillin asked. 

“I mean, he’s obviously suspicious as heck but you really think he’s Frieza?” 

Vegeta nodded. “We know Yamcha changed his body with the Dragon Balls. What if Frieza did the same?” 

“It’s too soon for him to have been able to do that with Earth’s set…” Bulma contemplated, “but I bet Dende could find out for us if the Namekian or Super Dragon Balls had been used. And he could confirm what Piccolo was saying, that he isn’t from Earth.” 

“Let’s ask him first thing tomorrow!” 

Before anything further could be decided, Bulma waved at Goku as he approached the group. “Hey-“

“I heard half of what you guys were saying,” he cut her off, his tone serious. “I don’t know how or why, but I’m positive. That’s definitely Frieza.” 

\- - - 

Despite the stresses of having to hide his identity and handle being around those Saiyans he hated so much, Frieza felt rather content as he left the party that evening. The way Yamcha treated him like a precious treasure the whole time… it was so nice. 

Was it really so important to rush learning the truth at this point? He had what he’d wanted at last… 

It might have cost him his empire, and all his strength… but he had a version of his prince that seemed to finally be open and transparent with him. To have him back at his side felt so right. The questions would get answered eventually. For now? 

Maybe it was the many drinks he’d had that evening talking, but… If this was love, maybe it was something he shouldn’t have been avoiding. 

Yamcha was also feeling amorous as they returned home, said good night to Puar, and headed to their bedroom. “That went really well, I’m so glad you got to meet everybody!” 

“They certainly seem like a unique group…” 

The two men got out of their clothes and got ready for bed. Not long after, they were laying on their sides, bodies close. Yamcha let his eyes run down Shiraz’s bare skin. “You are just too damn gorgeous.” 

Frieza reached up and stroked Yamcha’s hair. “Naturally, as are you.” They stayed like that for a moment, smiling at each other, before Frieza swung a leg over Yamcha, pushing him onto his back and straddling him. “But I think after all the effort I put in to being such a charming guest at your friend’s festivities you owe me some manner of reward.” 

“Is that what you think?” Yamcha smirked up at his boyfriend. “Well, that can probably be arranged…” with the speed and power his years of martial arts and sports training allowed him he grabbed the smaller man’s waist and tossed him on the bed to his side before rolling onto him, pinning him down, “if you’re willing to work for it that is.” 

Oh, Frieza loved this. He wrapped his arms around his lover and whispered in his ear, “whatever it takes, my dear Yamcha…” 

One incredible hour later a satisfied Frieza laid curled up in Yamcha’s arms, his head on his lover’s chest. “You’re amazing, thank you for that.” 

“Anything for you, my lord-“ the words came out without thinking, and suddenly the human was wide awake again. Frieza, too used to being called that particular title after a lifetime of it, didn’t notice the slip-up.

As Shiraz drifted off to sleep in his arms, Yamcha stared down at the rose gold band around his wrist. 

True to his word, other than the brief moment when he lost his tail and thus moved it to his arm, he had never taken it off. 

Shiraz was wonderful, and in so many ways he seemed like a second chance to be with Frieza. But he wasn’t ‘his lord.’ This was a human he’d only known for a little less than two weeks. And he cared too much about both Frieza and Shiraz for it to be fair to them for him to treat them like the same person… 

Was he in love? And was it with Frieza, or Shiraz, or both? They were just so similar… 

Whatever he felt, it was powerful. And it left him feeling incredibly confused. 

End Chapter Thirteen: To Stand Where I Stood

Author’s note: 

So everyone is figuring it out except Yamcha, who is ignoring all the obvious signs and instead making things hard on himself. But hey, both of our boys are using the word ‘love’ in their mental dialog so at least the relationship is progressing a bit! 

Thanks again- I can not stress this enough- to the amazing, supportive, wonderful people that have been supporting this fic. I appreciate you all SO MUCH. Give yourselves a high five from me.


	14. The Pieces Finally Fit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Torn up by his guilt, Yamcha decides it's time to tell the full story to Shiraz... but before Frieza can do the same they're threatened from two directions. Can they survive long enough to share how they truly feel?

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Fourteen: The Pieces Finally Fit

Yamcha was not normally prone to introspection. He was impulsive, and moved with whatever emotion held him at the moment. It was part of his charm, to Frieza at least, as it was such a refreshing contrast to his own calculating and overly analytical nature. 

As such, Frieza immediately noticed when his boyfriend seemed lost in thought the following morning. 

Yamcha had to work that day, which meant Frieza was left at home alone for hours to think things over himself. 

He wasn’t sure if he should be worried… maybe his lover was just tired. After all, they’d lost a bit of sleep the prior night. After glancing around to make sure Puar wasn’t present to witness him, Frieza laid back on the couch, hugging himself and smiling like an idiot. Yes, that had been amazing. Ever since he’d met Yamcha the man had been his constant fantasy, and he was always just as passionate and energetic in bed as he was out of it. It was a shame he had no idea if or when he would get to experience Yamcha while in his true form, but even in this strange human body, it was somehow perfect. 

His disappointing fumbling around with a terrified Zarbon years ago or all the times he’d taken care of himself paled in comparison. 

The more time passed the more he felt he could stay like this long term… although without his empire to run he had more free time than he was used to, which made him excessively restless… And of course, there was no way his disappearance had gone unnoticed, and he could only imagine what his allies and enemies in space were doing in his absence. 

He’d figure that all out later. For now he decided to take a nap. 

\- - - 

“You’re completely positive?” 

The Earth’s guardian nodded. “Yes, I even asked them to double check, but the Namekian Dragon Balls haven’t been touched. Shiraz isn’t from Earth, but he didn’t use the Dragon Balls to get a human body.” 

“What about the Super Dragon Balls?” Krillin asked. 

“I already checked with Whis, he literally laughed at the idea,” Goku replied. 

“So we’re out of possibilities? I guess we just need to keep an eye on the situation and hope we’re all wrong…”

“No, I don’t think waiting is a good idea,” Goku explained. “I mean, you guys said Yamcha’s plan had been to use his fake form to make Frieza fall for him then kill him once his guard was down, right? If we assume Frieza is here to get his revenge on him by doing the same thing then-“ 

“Ugh, then considering how disgusting they were being at the party yesterday I’d say that monster succeeded in the first part,” Vegeta looked repulsed. 

“Yeah… Yamcha seemed like he was completely infatuated with ‘Shiraz,’ so that means we need to act fast, he could try and kill him at any time at this point!” 

“So what’s the plan?” Krillin asked, “should we go now and try to kill him first? If we catch him off guard while he’s in that human form we could do it easy.” 

Vegeta shook his head. “Frieza isn’t sloppy. I’ll bet he has all sorts of safeguards in place, especially if he’s hiding in a weaker body. If we confront him without being totally prepared he might have one of his soldiers take Yamcha out or something.”

“How about this?” Goku suggested, “we get the rest of the group together, that way if he tries to use his army we’ll be ready to fight a larger number. Then we’ll go together and call ‘Shiraz’ out. You guys can keep our friend safe and I’ll fight Frieza, sound good?” 

“Other than the part where you get to be the one to defeat Frieza,” Vegeta glared, but his rival ignored it.

“I still can’t believe Yamcha of all people got an incredible power up last year and you guys hid it from me… I didn’t even get to fight him… Anyway, this is the plan then! We’ll make our move today. Yamcha’s safety depends on it!” 

\- - - 

Unable to concentrate, Yamcha had left practice early. Unlike every other work day since Shiraz came into his life he didn’t go straight back to their apartment, instead heading to his old home, the desert. He needed to think. 

It was strange how he’d been so phobic of the sorts of people he had so desperately wanted to connect with that he’d chosen to hide out here all those years ago. Being honest with himself he knew he’d never really been able to handle romance properly. He wanted it more than anything, and that wound up being the exact reason he couldn’t have it. 

He thought about all the time he’d spent clinging to his failed relationship with Bulma, sure he’d never get a chance at something so good again. Then there was Frieza… he should have known his heart was too open, too vulnerable, to be able to try and fake a romantic spark with someone as incredible as that without actually falling hard himself. 

And then, Shiraz… 

Frieza was literally his ideal man, and while they hadn’t properly dated, what they had shared had boosted Yamcha’s self confidence so much. But there were two problems, the first being the lies that it had been based on that stopped it from actually going anywhere, and then of course… Frieza was evil. 

Shiraz shared the same cunning, forceful personality that had drawn him to the emperor, and unlike Frieza he seemed fully willing to commit himself to Yamcha. Yet in his rush into a relationship with what seemed like another chance at his prior lost lover he had turned a willfully blind eye to a lot of what was admittedly very odd about Shiraz’s story. Furthermore, while his petite boyfriend was the cutest human he’d ever laid eyes on… even with his human body back Yamcha had never desired anyone as much as he wanted Frieza. 

But in the end… while he couldn’t have Frieza, he couldn’t take all those powerful feelings and just assign them to someone else. It wasn’t right for Frieza, or Shiraz, or Yamcha himself. 

A difficult decision had to be made. 

\- - - 

Frieza woke from a deep sleep when he heard Puar enthusiastically greeting Yamcha at the door. Yawning, he sat up and pushed his hair back into place- ‘bedhead’ was one of the many things he despised about being in this mammal body. 

“Welcome home, handsome-“ when he saw the look on his lover’s face he immediately paused. 

“Shiraz… we need to talk.” 

“I’m listening.” 

“Let’s go somewhere quiet. Here…” He quickly crossed the room and put his arms around his boyfriend, lifting him up, then headed to the open window and flew onto the roof. “So part of why I just did that is to show you... there are a lot of things in this world that might seem strange and unbelievable, like people flying, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t true.” 

Frieza of course wasn’t the slightest bit phased by the short flight but quickly realized he should pretend to be. “I didn’t know you could do that.” 

“That’s only the beginning of it…” Yamcha set him down, and they both sat down on the roof, facing away from the late afternoon sun. “Shiraz, I haven’t been completely honest with you about things. A lot of things. Important things. But that changes now.” 

Was this it? Was he finally, after all this time, going to find the answers he’d sought? 

…did he even want to know at this point? Frieza slowly nodded. Want to or not, he needed to know. Besides, regardless of his own feelings, it seemed like it was important for Yamcha to say this. 

“Alright… so you know my friends were a little weird? That’s in part just because, well, quite a few of them are actually aliens. Hard to believe, I know…” 

“I’m far more open minded than you seem to be giving me credit for.”

“Sorry, sorry. That will make all of this easier to explain though.” Yamcha pushed his hair back out of his eyes and continued. “So my friends and I, mostly by accident, and partially by design, we protect Earth. There’s been a lot of incidents… You remember Cell of course. It was actually my friend Gohan who defeated him, not Mr. Satan, even though he took credit.” 

Oh, Frieza remembered Cell alright, but not from whatever Earth based trouble he caused that Yamcha was referring to. He remembered crossing paths briefly with that smug yet admittedly charming giant insect in Hell, back before they moved Frieza into his private confinement. 

“Most people only know about a handful of them but there were actually multiple other threats to the planet that we took care of. One of them…” Yamcha turned to his boyfriend, took a deep breath, and said the name that had been on his mind non stop for the last year or so, “…one of them was an alien tyrant named Frieza.” 

It took everything the man in question had in him not to flinch hearing his own name from his handsome lover for the first time in so long.

“This Frieza, he considered himself the emperor of space. He did a lot of bad things… Killed a lot of people. He died, but was brought back to life by the magic of an item called the Dragon Balls. See, they’re-“ 

“I’ve heard that legend,” the faux human interjected before he was subjected to a long explanation he didn’t need. 

“Really? Well, it’s not a just legend, I’ve seen their power multiple times. In fact, I’d uh, kinda be dead right now if it weren’t for them. Anyway, to keep this as short as I can while saying what I need to say, Frieza died again and was revived by an angel- yes, those are real too- after he helped save our entire universe. He did it for selfish reasons of course.” Yamcha paused and looked back over at his boyfriend. “Following me so far?” 

“Of course.” 

“Anyway… This part is embarrassing to have to tell you… You know I’m strong. Way stronger than normal. But I’m kinda one of the weakest in my group of friends.” He paused, laughed a little bitterly, then continued, “Sometimes I’m a bit of a joke to them. I laugh it off but it hurts to give everything you have yet only have your mistakes or the places where you don’t measure up be what’s remembered. So my friend Krillin, who’s in a similar place, thought we’d do something that could get everyone’s respect. We wanted to be the ones who beat Frieza.” 

“I see…” Irritation that anyone would marginalize someone as amazing as Yamcha quickly gave way to the cold realization that his suspicions had been correct all along. The man of his dreams had never been his ally. But he let him continue, he needed to hear the whole story or he’d never get his closure. 

“We wished for more strength than our human bodies could handle, I asked the wrong question, and it all backfired and I wound up losing my human body and instead becoming, well, an alien. Don’t worry though, I’m not one anymore I promise!” 

“That much is obvious, get back to the story.” 

“You’re right, sorry. I figured I’d make the most of it and use the strength the new body gave me to go to space, get my victory, and come home to the love and respect of my friends. But it turns out suddenly gained strength takes some work to learn to wield properly.” 

Oh, how well Frieza knew that. He learned that lesson in the most painful way possible when he first used his then new Golden form against Goku… But more important than that, he finally had another answer- the reason Yamcha was so awkward in his own body wasn’t because it was a form that suppressed his strength like Frieza used to use, but instead because the entire Icejin biology was new to him!

“I was strong but it wasn’t enough and I wasn’t patient enough to train until I figured it all out. But… this is the really embarrassing part, you have every right to judge me for this, but my friend Vegeta, he knew Frieza when he was younger, and uh… apparently I was his type. So he said I could win his heart, gain his trust, then destroy him not only physically, but psychologically.” 

So not even Yamcha’s romantic interest in him had been authentic? As his very worst suspicions seemed to be confirmed Frieza felt a burning rage- but it wasn’t directed toward Yamcha, but instead himself. He knew he shouldn’t have allowed himself to be taken in and yet he did it anyway… he fell head first into the trap his ‘assistant’ had laid for him. He folded his arms, the tension in his body physically painful, glaring off into space. After a moment he finally spoke, the anger making his voice falter slightly. “That… is disgusting.” 

Yamcha sighed. “I know. As someone who used to be so lonely I should have known better than anyone that it’s fucked up to try and manipulate someone’s feelings like that. But I thought it was okay because Frieza was bad… So I traveled to space, concocted this stupid backstory that I was a lost prince, used some evidence one of my alien friends had stolen to back it up, and landed a job working directly with him.” 

Still too angry to say much he just forced out “I see.” 

“But uh… that’s where it all went south.” Yamcha stood up and took a few steps away, turning to stare at the clouds. “It turns out, well… I’d expected an unredeemable monster but instead I found a charming, charismatic, smart, gorgeous guy that as time went by I found myself really liking. So much that my act dropped and instead of trying to be what I thought he’d want I was just myself, trying to get close to someone incredible.” 

That… dulled the anger slightly. “And then?” 

“I know he was still evil, but some stupid part of me thought we’d work. So many of my friends were once villains. My hands aren’t clean either, and I guess I’ll need to own up to that part of my past and tell you about it if you decide you still want to have anything to do with me after all of this. But in the end, Frieza was too smart. He saw through me, knew I wasn’t being honest with him. So I left.” 

“If you really thought you could make things work with him then why did you leave rather than be truthful?” If he didn’t get this answer now…

“…why would the emperor of space want to be with a lying, weak, nobody?” A dejected Yamcha sat back down beside the smaller man. “I’m not just telling you this because I need you to know that I was a manipulative scumbag. It gets worse.”

Still trying to sort all this new information in with his confused emotions, Frieza just nodded. “Continue.” 

“You and I… we got super intense super fast, right? It’s because I’m being awful again.” 

The anger came back up at that. “What, you’ve been dishonest with me too?” 

“Kinda… Shiraz, you are so, so perfect. But you’re also… so much like Frieza.” 

“Meaning what exactly, someone who easily falls for your lies?” Unable to destroy anything in this weak human body the only way he could vent his negative feelings was through sarcasm. 

“No, of course not…” Taking a deep breath, Yamcha grabbed his hands and looked him directly in the eyes. “I mean you’re both so beautiful, so cunning, so fascinating… You’re both someone I could… maybe… fall completely in love with.” 

Like that it was all gone- the anger, the confusion, the frustration. Both men just tightened their grip slightly and stared at each other for a moment. 

Blinking away the beginnings of tears, Yamcha sighed again and let go. “And that’s the problem. I can’t seem to separate the two of you in my mind or my heart! What I feel for you is in part what I feel for him just… redirected! It’s not right. You deserve someone who cares about you as yourself, not as a second chance at someone else!” 

Frieza looked at the whole situation with clarity at last. He’d came here for answers, but instead found something so precious that he stopped seeking that truth and instead avoided it, losing himself in a carefree life with the man of his dreams. It was all so obvious now… he knew at last what he really needed. “It seems this is a time for sharing truths, so there’s something I need to tell you as well. My dear, dear Yamcha, I’m-“ 

“You’ve been an incredibly difficult man to locate this time.” 

“Shit!” Both men jumped up, Yamcha quickly stepping in front of his partner. “Stay behind me!” 

Standing just a few feet away were a calm as ever Hit and very smug Frost. “We were all set to take care of you once and for all when your energy signature vanished and we lost track. Hiding in this weak human form might have spared you from our detection a little longer, but surely you must realize that you’ve made it a lot easier for me to kill you?” The other Icejin asked. 

“What are you even doing here? We’ve barely met, why would you waste your time tracking me down?” Yamcha asked. 

Hit’s eyes widened slightly, then he said to Frost, “The scars. I think that’s the assistant.” 

“Oh, you’re right,” Frost looked Yamcha over again. “I suppose it makes sense he’d take him into hiding as well, but it doesn’t matter, two humans die just as easily as one.” 

“Wait, you aren’t here for me? I’m lost here.” 

The faux human stepped out from behind Yamcha. “Your grudge is with me, Frost. Do not touch him!” 

“…Shiraz, are you…?” 

They looked at each other for a moment once again. “Yes, my dear prince. I am sorry for not telling you sooner, but it seems you understand the fear that transparency can come with great risk to something precious…”

“It’s a shame this couldn’t have all came out sooner,” Yamcha sighed. “I wish I could protect you, but I think we both know… I’m too weak. Sorry to have to ask but can you switch back?”

Frieza shook his head. “Unfortunately my taking on a human body wasn’t entirely voluntary. I don’t know if or how I can regain my real one.” 

“Really? Well, I still think we will survive this, so then maybe…”

“We can finally do what you suggested so long ago and try this for real.” 

“Are you two done?” Frost cut in. “I’d like to get on with my revenge here?”

“That guy is really set on ruining the mood. Lame. Now hold on and I can get us out of here,” Yamcha laughed as he took a spot by Frieza’s side then lifted two fingers toward his forehead-

Neither the real nor faux human saw Hit move, but he was suddenly in front of Yamcha. “Were you planning Instant Transmission? I can’t allow that.” 

“Shit…” he slowly lowered his hand and instead held it out to his boyfriend. 

Accepting it, he replied, “this time with you has meant everything to me. Thank you.” 

“Hey… from here out, even if we only have a few seconds left, no secrets. Powerful ruler or quirky normal guy… I love you, my lord.” 

The words had a incredible effect on both the man who spoke them and the one they were aimed at. Frieza nodded, looking up into the kind eyes of the man who’d won him over completely. “No secrets. Mysterious dream prince or handsome human… I feel… the same for you, my Yamcha.” 

“Are they ever going to shut up?” Frost muttered. “Hey, Hit, I think they’re just stalling, can you please do your assassin thing now- WHAT?!” 

Fully honest at last, in another glow of light the statue’s magic dissolved away- leaving the Icejin emperor where the faux human had previously stood. Before the two from Universe 6 could react he powered up into his Golden form and stepped back in front of lover. “Well, this is convenient. Are you still so sure you would want a fight, Frost?” 

“Hit, you can still take him down!” 

The assassin raised a fist- then all of a sudden Goku, Vegeta, Krillin, Android 18, Gohan, and Piccolo appeared on the rooftop. “So you show your true form at last, ‘Shriaz?’” Goku asked, then noticed the two warriors from Universe 6. “Oh, hey, it’s been ages, good to see you Hit!” 

Frost turned to his comrade. “Can you assassinate Vegeta and the rest too?”

The group turned their attention to Frieza. “It looks like we got here just in time,” Goku advanced toward the newly restored emperor. “It’s okay Yamcha, you’re safe now. I’ll take care of this guy.”

“Oh no you don’t!” Frost shouted. “This is my revenge, I won’t have anyone interfering!” 

Vegeta approached the two from Universe 6. “I don’t know what you’re planning on doing here Frost but I think you’re long overdue for an ass kicking.” 

Somewhat panicked, Yamcha looked around at the warrior-covered rooftop, watching everyone get ready for a fight- “Wait!” All eyes suddenly on him, he nervously continued, “It’s okay! Just… give us a minute? Please?” Without waiting for a response he turned around, grabbed Frieza’s hand, and they vanished. 

Frost growled, but didn’t take his eyes off Vegeta. “They can’t hide from us for long. Let’s finish off this guy and then we’ll track them down again-“ 

Hit sighed. “Come on Frost. We’re leaving.” 

“Wait, no! Not yet!” 

“I’m not letting you die for the sake of your grudge.” He grabbed the still angry Frost by the arm and dragged him away.

“So uh… anyone have any idea what’s actually going on?” Gohan asked.

\- - - 

Somewhere far, far away from our planet the two men reappeared an instant later. “I didn’t realize you had that skill,” Frieza commented, taking a moment to assess their surroundings, see they were safe for the time being, and drop back down from Golden into his usual form. 

“Yeah, I picked that up while I was traveling after, well…” He trailed off as the two men stared at each other, finally both in their true bodies. After a moment, Yamcha smiled, “did you mean what you said? We can really… be together? As our selves?” 

Frieza nodded. “I’m aware there will be complications. But I’m prepared to handle them.”

“You know…” Yamcha took a step closer, “when I was in my other body, I was so attracted to you, but wondered if it was just because we were briefly the same species…” 

“Incidentally, while in that human form, I had similar questions about my desire for you,” Frieza also moved in, the remaining space between them vanishing. 

“I guess there’s no more uncertainty there, huh?” The human wrapped his warm arms around his lover. The Icejin leaned into it, pulling his tail around them both. 

“Correct.” 

“There’s one thing I’m still really confused on, though. Why were you human? And how did you change back? I know it wasn’t the Dragon Balls…” 

“It was the statue. It seems it’s ability wasn’t a mere legend after all.” 

“Seriously?! And your greatest desire was to be human?!” 

“No… I merely wished for an opportunity to have you be honest with me.” Frieza looked back up at his human, the slightest smile pulling at the edges of his lips. “The disguise allowed me to see you as you truly are, but once we were both fully open with one another I suppose whatever magic changed me was no longer necessary.” 

“Got it…” Yamcha leaned down slightly, bringing their lips so close… “So uh, my lord, is it cool if I get ‘familiar’ now?” 

“You have my full permission to be as ‘familiar’ as you’d like, whenever you’d like, and however you’d like, from here forward.” 

The kiss was full of loving, burning, passionate energy. Nothing had ever felt so right. 

End Chapter Fourteen: The Pieces Finally Fit

Author’s Note: 

Almost to the end! It’s a weird feeling. I’ve been working on this story for so long at this point. Can I thank you all for joining me in this once again? Cuz THANK YOU. Anyway, our boys are finally honest, finally a real couple, and finally both in their real bodies… but they aren’t out of trouble completely yet. The remaining loose ends- will Yamcha’s friends accept this? Is Frost gonna keep chasing his revenge? And you know, Frieza’s evil as heck and Yamcha’s a hero- will be tied up in the final chapter! Which might actually not be the final, I’m considering breaking off a scene into an epilogue as it’s running long and I can’t stop adding to it and it might make the chapter too long. Anyway yeah. Comments and such fuel me, and as you’ve hopefully noticed I reply to them WITH ENTHUSIASM.


	15. Face My Fears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frieza and Yamcha reveal the truth of their relationship to Yamcha's friends, Goku gives them a gift, Frieza finds a new focus, and Frost decides something else is more important than revenge...

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Chapter Fifteen: Face My Fears 

“…and that’s as much of the story as you guys need to know,” Yamcha finished. “The important thing is that I love him. So I need to be able to count on you all allowing him to come to Earth from time to time, okay? For my sake?” 

Several hours after they had narrowly avoided a big fight on the rooftop the newly legitimate couple reunited with Yamcha’s friends for a brief explanation. Reactions were mixed. 

“Not a chance!” Vegeta glared at them both. “Frieza’s a monster, he’s not capable things like ‘loving’ or ‘being loved.’ If you expect me to believe for even a moment that he’s switched sides-“ 

Frieza had been silent up to this point, simply standing beside Yamcha with his arms crossed, glaring at nothing in particular, but he finally cut in- “Oh, don’t worry, Vegeta. No one expects you to believe that because I haven’t. I am not and will never be a hero, or willing to defend this planet, or part of your little group of friends. The only thing that has changed is my partnership with this one specific man.” For a moment his eyes met those of his boyfriend, and they both smiled a little before the emperor quickly forced his face back into its prior expression and continued, “I intend to have nothing to do with the rest of you, I can assure you of that.” 

“I don’t care,” the Saiyan replied, “I’m not simply going to sit back and let you do as you please on my planet. In fact, I don’t see any reason not to just kill you right here and now-“ 

“Come on, Vegeta!” Goku stepped in front of him. “It sounds like Frieza isn’t planning on causing us any trouble, so we should let them have this-“ 

“Yeah!” Puar interjected. “They deserve to be happy!”

Yamcha smiled gratefully. “Thanks Puar, Goku, I knew we could rely on you two-“ 

Eyes practically sparkling with excitement, Goku continued talking to Vegeta, “-And maybe Frieza and Yamcha’ll get married and it’ll be like you and Bulma or Krillin and 18 and Frieza will become a good guy and we can spar with him whenever we want! Wouldn’t that be great?” 

“Are you kidding me?” The emperor rolled his eyes, and his boyfriend quickly put an arm around his shoulders and waved to the rest of the group. 

“Anyway, we said what we need to. Later!” And once again they vanished with the help of Instant Transmission. 

\- - - 

As the months passed, true to his word Frieza would return to the planet periodically to visit Yamcha, or to pick him up and bring him to space for a few days at a time. That was all though- if it wasn’t for feeling his Ki the rest of the group would never have even known he was there. As time moved on without incident, the group began to slowly realize that once again, a villain had been at least somewhat redeemed. 

But Frieza hadn’t misspoke when he said there would be complications in the two of them being together, and the acceptance of Yamcha’s friends was far from the biggest of them. 

“Come on, stand up!” The emperor shouted down at his lover. “I’m not letting you quit your training this easily!” 

Panting and drenched in sweat, Yamcha shook his head and replied from where he sat on the ground. “I can’t, I told you! I’m not like you, Frieza. I’m just a human! I have limits!” 

“And if you just accept that then how are you ever going to get strong enough for this to work? Do you intend to just give up on us?”

Forcing himself slowly to his feet, Yamcha crossed his arms and glared at Frieza. “I’m not giving up, I’m being realistic. This is as strong as I’m ever gonna get, not from lack of trying, but because this is the best my body can do-“ 

“So that’s it? You’re content with things as they are now?” He returned the glare. 

“Of course not. Do you think I like only getting to see you a couple days a month?! I wanna share the rest of my life with you, to live with you, on Earth or in space or wherever! I love you, but I don’t think the problem here is my weakness. It’s your paranoia!” 

“Paranoia? Is that how you’d like to see this? You claim you’re the one being realistic here, but you have no idea the enemies I’ve made. The moment anything changes that makes it obvious that you matter to me someone will try and use you against me! I’m already constantly worried Frost is going to come back and kill you!” He paused, took a deep breath, and softened his tone considerably before he continued. “I can protect myself. I’m not used to having anyone else in my life worth protecting. I just can’t stop thinking about the possibility of losing you, and I despise how vulnerable it makes me feel.” 

Yamcha relaxed a little himself, and smiled sadly at his boyfriend. “I get it…” He sighed, then tried to sound more upbeat. “Hey, if it makes you feel better I’ll keep up this training with you, okay? I might not be able to get any stronger but if it gives you some peace of mind it’s worth the exhaustion.” 

“Thank you, my dear Yamcha,” Frieza reached up and lightly stroked his boyfriend’s hair. “I still believe we’ll be able to find a way to get you stronger, and until then, I’ll do the best I can to protect us both.” 

“I’m sorry I’ve been holding us back-“ suddenly the sky went dark and both men narrowed their eyes. “That’s gotta be the Dragon Balls!” 

“For what purpose have they been assembled, I wonder?” They watched the air above them turn blue once more a moment later. Frieza shivered. “Odd… I felt something.” 

Staring down at himself then his partner, Yamcha shook his head. “Me too… what the heck did they wish for?” 

“Hey guys!” 

Already on edge from months of worrying about his human lover, then put further on edge by the moment’s circumstances, Frieza spun around and grabbed Goku by the throat before anyone present had a chance to process his arrival. “…oh. You.” He let go and took a step back. “You aren’t welcome here.” 

“Aw, don’t be like that! I got you guys gifts!” 

Yamcha stepped next to Frieza and gently put a hand on his shoulder, feeling him relax slightly under his touch. “Gifts huh? Well thanks! But first, the sky a minute ago- that was the dragon, right? You know anything about that?” 

Goku nodded, grinning. “That was me! The gifts I’m giving required Shenron’s assistance!” 

“What are you playing at?” Frieza asked. 

“Well, I thought it would be kinda fun for you guys, since you both recently had another body, if you could change back and forth at will, so I wished for that!” Goku explained. 

“Trust me,” Yamcha sighed, “I’ve dreamed about getting my Icejin body and strength back, but Shenron won’t grant the same wish twice-“ he paused, looked at Frieza, and smiled, “-but it would be fun to see my cute ‘Shiraz’ again from time to time! Frieza, try changing!” 

“I’m not about to weaken myself in front of Son Goku!” 

“Nah, it wasn’t a problem! The Dragon granted it without issue, after all, your original wish was just for the strength to beat Frieza, so wishing for you to be able to go between human and Icejin was a totally different wish.” 

“Seriously?! That’s a loophole?!” Yamcha and Frieza stared at each other, hope reflected in both their eyes. “Let’s see…” not really sure what to do, he concentrated on that other body- and felt the sudden change in strength and balance that he immediately recognized. “It worked?” 

“My goodness, if it isn’t my handsome and strong Prince Yamcha…” Frieza hooked his tail around Yamcha’s newly restored one. “And he’s even more handsome than I remembered…” 

“Stronger too,” the former human replied, “I never showed you just how powerful I was back then. Time to change that! Hey Goku, be honest, the real reason you did this is because you wanted to spar with me like this, right? And giving Frieza the ability to switch back to human was just an afterthought since you still had the second wish?” 

“Guilty as charged!” 

“Then let’s fight!” 

“Yeah! Let’s do this-” 

Without any further chatter Yamcha sent him flying with one full powered kick. He then returned to his true body, and turned to Frieza. “Well, what do you know, your faith in my ability to get strong enough has been rewarded after all. It just needed a little outside help… So with that in mind…” 

“This opens up many possibilities for us… exciting ones. But before we decide which of them we’re going to chase, change back and take me home.” 

“Huh?” 

Frieza, a slight blush staining his cheeks, ran the tip of his tail down the front of his lover’s body. “There are things I’ve been yearning to do with you in that Icejin body… You’ll indulge me, won’t you?” 

With a laugh, Yamcha obliged, once again concentrating on his alien form and, after transforming, he picked his lover up, kissed him, and flew back to their apartment. 

\- - - 

There was still so much to figure out. Confident now that no one could threaten Yamcha to retaliate against him, Frieza finally started openly dating the sometimes human, not just on Earth but in space as well. They lived between Frieza’s ship and Yamcha’s apartment depending on how their moods moved them, but they both knew this couldn’t last. 

While Yamcha’s heroic nature couldn’t stand Frieza’s job, he didn’t push him. Whatever Frieza chose, he wanted it to be something he could be confident in- it had to be Frieza’s choice, and not something he felt forced into. One interesting development during this time period? The emperor took an interest in Earth’s literature. He asked his boyfriend to teach him to read in his alphabet, and mastered it over the course of several hours- he really was a genius. But his taste in books struck Yamcha as being a bit, well, dry. 

Tax codes? Text books on business law? Article after article on acquiring investors, commodities trading, and raw materials markets? 

Well, if this was what interested him he wasn’t going to judge. 

As for Frieza, the moment he’d learned the results of Goku’s wish he’d realized he was at a turning point… It had just taken him some time to commit to what path he’d follow going forward. One thing was for certain though- it was time to give up the past, and in that, he found two new focuses for the future. The first? Spending as much time as he could with the handsome, funny, sexy, fascinating human who had showed him that love was more than just a distraction, and that it could be okay to place complete trust in someone. 

The second? 

“Are you sure about this, my lord?” 

Staring down at the piles of paperwork spread out on the table in front of them, Frieza nodded. “The planet trade… that was the result of my father’s hard work. I may have inherited control over it, and given it my full energy for so many years, but it was never mine. Furthermore… I was too good at it. I’m ready for a challenge. I’m far overdue to build something of my own.” 

“Yeah, but of all things… starting a construction business?” 

“Running a legitimate business venture that I started from scratch seems like exactly the sort of challenge worthy of my intellect.” 

“You know I’ll be here and ready to support you however I can.” 

“My dear Yamcha, I’m counting on it.” He slid a piece of paper toward the other man. “As you can see you’re an essential part of my initial marketing pitch.”

“You want me as your spokesman?” 

“Apparently humans respond quite well to attractive celebrities telling them what to do.” 

“Calling me a celebrity is a bit of a stretch these days now that I’m retired from professional sports.” 

“You’ll make up for that with your looks and natural charisma, I’m certain,” Frieza replied, placing his hand on his boyfriend’s. “It’s important to me to have you be a part of this… I want this next chapter of our lives to be something we create together.” 

“When you put it like that suddenly all this paperwork seems romantic,” Yamcha laughed a little, lacing his fingers with Frieza’s. “But what about your old life? You’ve said it yourself, if you just up and leave then someone else is gonna take control of what you left behind… do you really think they’ll leave lose ends like, you know, you still being alive?” 

“I’ve given that more thought than you’ll ever know,” Frieza sighed, “but we have an advantage now. As Icejin, we’re the strongest couple in the universe. And as humans, we’re practically undetectable. We can fight, or rely on stealth, as needed. I have no doubt it will only be a temporary inconvenience. I was the only one suited to run my former empire. Without me at it’s head infighting will destroy it. I’m confident of this.” 

“You really do think of everything, huh? You’re so smart, it’s part of what I love about you.” 

“Oho ho ho, only in this body, my dear Yamcha,” he smirked a bit at his human lover. “When I’m ‘Shiraz’ I’m far too distracted by unnecessary emotions to achieve any sort of mental clarity. I don’t know how you manage with that being your default form.” 

Yamcha shrugged. “I dunno, it was never a problem for me.” 

“You were a strange and remarkably unreserved Icejin.” 

“Maybe it’s less about whether we’re aliens or not and more about the fact that I’m not afraid of embracing my emotions, unlike a certain gorgeous boyfriend of mine,” he teased. 

“That’s simply incorrect. I’m not afraid of anything.” 

“Sure you aren’t…” Yamcha noticed Frieza’s previously playful expression had turned thoughtful. “Babe? Something on your mind?” 

Frieza stood up. “This conversation has reminded me of something I’m long overdue for sharing with you… Let’s go somewhere private.” 

In the bedroom a moment later, Yamcha asked, “so what’s this about?” 

“First, I need you to switch. What I need to show you will lose its impact if you aren’t at your strongest.” Frieza waited while a confused Yamcha became an Icejin once more, then he continued, “The first time we spoke privately, you asked to see all my transformations, but I declined to show you the first three as they contained my power to the point that I would have left myself vulnerable… Well… at this point you’ve seen me as a human and continued to be worth my trust, so I suppose it’s about time.” He paused, closed his eyes, and for the first time in years took on his first form. 

“Whoa, look at you!” Yamcha leaned down, looking over his greatly changed lover. “I didn’t know you ever had horns, and your even tinier than usual, and just… you’re so cute all of a sudden!” 

Frieza, who’d been scowling, embarrassed to be seen so much weaker than usual without the excuse of being human to explain it away, folded his arms and shook his head. “I don’t appreciate being called such things you know… in fact…” 

Yamcha stepped back as Frieza’s ki increased, momentarily blinding him before he looked up at… “Holy shit.” 

“Well, now you’re the ‘tiny and cute’ one,” sneered second form Frieza. “What have you got to say to that?” 

“…um… just that this is making me feel things.” 

“Such as?”

“A mixture of excitement and terror at the prospect of you using this form with me in the bedroom, mainly.” 

Frieza laughed, leaned down to give his lover a quick but aggressive kiss, then stepped back. “One more…” 

His ki increased again, and his body changed dramatically, rendering Yamcha completely speechless. The former emperor smirked, or as much as he could in his monstrous third form. This was the one he knew would be off-putting even to someone as completely infatuated as his Yamcha… or so he’d assumed. To Frieza’s surprise, Yamcha approached him. “This is so… so cool! You look so freaky and I love it!” 

With a shrug, he resumed his usual self. “You’re a strange one… but I hope you appreciated why I showed you those.” His lover nodded then returned to his own usual body.

“Of course! Your trust in me means a lot, thanks for finally satisfying that curiosity,” he winked and added, “And for the record I’m totally and completely into all of those looks for you, and of course Golden too, but this is still my favorite.” To make his point he pulled the smaller man close and continued, “literally everything about you is incredible, my lord. I know you’re gonna absolutely kill it at your new business venture, and just…” after a moment of tightly hugging Frieza he finally finished, “I’m just so lucky!” 

\- - - 

“We have to go back. I don’t understand why you’ve been stalling. Every moment Frieza lives is a painful reminder of how he used me!” Hit ignored Frost’s rant, much to the Icejin’s irritation. “Come on! We’ve put this off long enough. I paid you for this job and I expect you to see it through!” 

Hit crossed his arms and shook his head. “I’m ending the contract.” 

“Wait, are you serious?! What about your pride as an assassin?!” 

“There are certain things that are far more valuable than pride, Frost. The sooner you realize that the better off you’ll be.” 

“Are you kidding me? Fine then, if you’re too afraid to take on Frieza-“

“That’s not what I’m afraid of.” 

“So you do admit you’re scared? What is it then, his assistant again?” 

“You’re too important. I’m not losing you.” 

They’d danced around it for so long at this point that it came as a surprise to them both when Hit all but admitted to caring about Frost. After a couple silent moments, the Icejin regained his usual sass and shrugged. “Fine then, I’ll set aside that goal for now. I hope you plan on making this up to me… maybe… by staying near me even though our business arrangement has ended?” 

Hit nodded, a small smile on his face.

End Chapter Fifteen: Face My Fears

Author’s Note: THIS ISN’T THE END. May have noticed the chapter count jumped up again. I broke the final part off of this chapter and will publish it as an epilogue to give myself more time to get it right because it’s important things end on the right note for this fic that I’ve been so dang invested in. I don’t even know what I’m gonna do with myself once I’m done with this… 

Anyway, looks like Frost and Hit won’t be causing any more trouble for our boys, and Goku at least has accepted them. So now it all comes down to Frieza at this point… Will he be able to behave as a legitimate businessman? And will he and Yamcha be able to maintain their trust and promise not to keep secrets? 

Again, thank you thank you thank you to everyone who’s supported this. Y’all are the best :D


	16. The Promise

Perfect Stranger by MajinPiccolo

Epilogue: The Promise

To the surprise of everyone except Yamcha, Frieza really did change. After leaving the planet trade he never looked back, and fully invested his energies into his entrepreneurship. Using his knowledge of rebuilding planets to increase their value, as well as his access to rare materials from space, the seemingly random choice of going into construction turned out to be a perfect fit. While he mostly ran the business side of it for the sake of having a challenge to keep his sharp mind active, it also gave him an outlet for his physical strength when he was feeling restless and decided to join the building crews he employed. 

Planets or office buildings, Frieza knew what he was doing with real estate!

With the quick success of the business came fantastic cashflow, but he wasn’t in it for the money- he saw it as simply a way to keep score of his success. Still, with these new earnings added to their already existing wealth, Frieza and Yamcha lived more than comfortably. 

“All of the time we’ve spent together, well, it’s the happiest I’ve been in forever! And these last two years living together have been especially amazing.” Yamcha took a deep breath before continuing, “I want to make sure we’re together for the rest of forever. I want to be yours forever, if you’ll be willing to have me. What I’m trying to say is, Frieza, will you marry me?” 

“Nah, that’s terrible,” Krillin sighed. “How many times are you gonna say ‘forever?’ It sounds cliche.” 

“Come on, this is the most important question I’m ever gonna ask, how am I supposed to stay poetic when my heart’s about to jump out of my chest just practicing?” He sighed. “If I can even speak tonight when I’m face to face with him I’ll have shocked myself.” 

“You can do this!” Puar replied encouragingly, “Practicing with us is just a formality! Once you’re together I’m sure your real feelings will come out without fail!”

“Besides, while I’d never have believed it a couple years ago Frieza really is a new man now, if it’s not from love then I don’t know what!” Krillin added, giving his old friend a pat on the back. “That guy is totally smitten with you, even when he tries to act cold it’s soooo obvious. Even if all you do is stutter and shove a ring on his finger I’m sure he’ll say yes.” 

Yamcha smiled at that, but it there was some sadness in it. “You’re probably right. And I really want to do this tonight, on the second anniversary of his leaving his old life behind, but… there’s just one thing.” 

“Wait, you wanna propose immediately but you’re not fully sure yourself? Bad idea, man!” 

“That’s not it! I’m fully sure about how I feel about Frieza. He’s the one for me, I have no doubts. It’s just that, when we finally became a real couple, we promised each other we wouldn’t keep secrets from each other ever again, right? But… he’s been acting a little weird lately.” 

“Weird? Like what?” 

“Normally we always tell each other what we’re up to, but like, he went to space for a couple days without telling me why. Then he’s been going out after work this week and when I asked just out of curiosity what he was up to he completely dodged the question.” 

“Maybe… maybe you should talk to him about that first and propose some other time?” 

“But tonight would be so perfect! The date is significant, and we were already planning on having a special evening together…” 

“Just think it over carefully, okay buddy?” 

“Yeah… I will.” 

\- - - 

Frieza took a deep breath and started to delicately lower himself down on one knee, looking from the ring he held to the person in front of him- and frowned. “Is the kneeling truly necessary? I’m asking Yamcha for a permanent partnership, not pledging subservience.” 

Bulma nodded. “That’s just how it’s done, like it or not! I mean, you’re welcome to be all modern about it and not kneel, but since you’ve been coming to me to learn how to do this the traditional way, well, that’s what I’m gonna teach you.” 

“I’m following your advice on the rest- I bought him a ring, I’ll be dressed up, I’ve thought over what I’m going to say, I even chose a significant date. But I’m not kneeling.” 

“Suit yourself. I still think it’s adorable though, what you told me about buying him that bracelet he’s always wearing because you misunderstood our Earthling engagement ring custom-“ 

Frieza rolled his eyes. “I only shared that story to illustrate the depths of my lack of understanding on how to go about this. Anyway, I meant the sentiment behind it even if I hadn’t been informed of the other implications,” twisting the newly purchased engagement ring between his fingers, he smiled at it slightly. “But this time… this time I know what I’m asking. And this ring carries that symbolism. It shall perfectly match my prior gift to him.” 

Bulma leaned over to look at it. “Ooo, you’re right, it’s that same rose gold colored metal isn’t it? It’s pretty.” 

He nodded. “I went back to the same craftsman I bought the other one from. This material isn’t found on Earth. It’s rare, and precious…” 

“Like your love?” She asked, nudging him. Frieza switched back from sentimental to sassy immediately, glaring at Bulma. 

“I’m simply securing a formal partnership with someone worthy of me. Further commentary from you is unnecessary.” 

She tried not to laugh and instead said, “Yamcha is such a romantic, I know he’d melt if you proposed in a traditional way, but even if you did something totally boring he’d be over the moon for it. That guy is crazy over you.”

“Of course he is…” 

Bulma caught the slight unease in that pause. “Something’s still bothering you though. I can tell.” 

Frieza ignored her question. “I appreciate your help these last few days, but I do believe we’ve reached the end of this agreement.” 

He turned to leave, and as he walked off, Bulma called out after him, “just go with your heart and it’ll all be good, okay? Yamcha loves you, he’s gonna be so happy!” 

Hearing that he sighed but didn’t stop walking… Flying home, Frieza thought over the promise he and his beloved had made to each other. No secrets, they’d said. It had been difficult for Frieza. Dishonesty was in his nature, and lying came as easily to him as living. But once he developed his powerful feelings for Yamcha the idea of shared transparency became appealing. This was the only person he could ever fully trust, after all. He’d never doubted the other man was keeping up his end of the bargain, and yet… 

Yamcha had been behaving strangely the last few days. First he’d made a large purchase (while they kept separate bank accounts, Yamcha had asked Frieza for help managing his as he was the one who was good with finance) as evidenced by a sudden withdrawal of quite a bit of zeni, but when the former emperor casually inquired about about it Yamcha had froze up and been strangely evasive. Then, there were the quiet phone conversations he’d been having over the last few days, ones that he’d abruptly end as soon as Frieza entered the room. 

These things were disconcerting, to say the least, especially right before he planned to ask him for an even bigger commitment than just avoiding secrets… 

“Wait just one minute!” 

Irritated, Frieza paused his flight and turned to face a very angry Vegeta. “I’m not in the mood to deal with you today-“ 

“Bulma just told me you’re planning on proposing to Yamcha!?” The Saiyan grabbed him by the lapel of his jacket. 

Folding his arms, the emperor sneered at his former employee. “Yes, that’s correct. I fail to see why that’s upset you so much- perhaps you have secretly been in love with me all this time and are jealous?” 

The taunt had the desired effect and a disgusted Vegeta let go, sputtering, “Of course not!” 

“Well then, now that that’s been clarified, I must ask you not to say anything to my dear Yamcha about this until I’ve had the chance to ask him. According to your wife the timing of a proposal is traditionally a surprise in this culture-“ 

“I’m not dropping this so quickly!” Vegeta looked so angry he might about explode. It was more funny than intimidating to Frieza, so he let him continue. “All this time I’d been assuming that any day now you’d get tired of him and leave this planet for good, or better yet, you’d break the truce and I could finally kill you, but this?! You’re going to make this permanent?! I can’t allow that!” 

“There are quite a few issues with those statements,” Frieza replied lightly, “for example, the idea that anyone could simply ‘get tired’ of a man as fascinating as my Yamcha is ludicrous. Almost as much as the idea that you could kill me. But in the end…” he fixed a hard glare on the Saiyan and his tone briefly turned serious. “If you do anything to infringe on my plans for this evening, or the rest of our life together, well, I have several years worth of suppressed sadistic tendencies just waiting for an outlet. You will not interfere with us.” He paused a moment, then smiled. “Now, stop being so concerned about the affairs of your wife’s ex and your former employer, it’s embarrassing to watch. I’ve moved on from the past, Vegeta, I think it’s time you do the same.” 

Chuckling to himself he left Vegeta speechless and continued his flight home. 

\- - - 

“Geez, that was so good! I can see why that place claims to be the best reviewed restaurant in the universe,” Yamcha said as they strolled out the door holding hands after their meal. 

“Only the best, as we deserve,” Frieza replied. They were both human for the moment- this was the usual for them off-Earth these days. The former emperor of space’s rather conspicuous vanishing two years prior had only served to further increase his notoriety, and being recognized brought nothing but trouble. 

Still though… he looked up at the handsome man who had completely stolen his heart. When he asked, he was going to do it in his true form. Bulma had said that would be more romantic, and Frieza was inclined to agree. That was the version of himself that had the most to offer after all, as well as the one Yamcha had initially developed an attraction to. 

“Wanna head home?” Yamcha asked, “I know the night is young but uh, considering it’s an anniversary of sorts for us, well…” 

“For a man who can be so confident and assertive in the bedroom you can be rather amusingly shy about inviting me to join you in it.” 

Blushing, he just laughed and shrugged, then closed his eyes and felt across the cosmos for Puar’s ki- the easiest and quickest way to find their way back to the mansion that had been one of their company’s first projects and was now their residence. He’d taught Frieza Instant Transmission, and of course he’d quickly mastered it, but it seemed Yamcha was the only one of the two that could find the tiny shapeshifter’s Ki with ease. Probably a byproduct of a near lifetime of friendship. 

A moment later they were back, standing right outside the door to Puar’s wing of the home. With quick and practiced ease Frieza whipped his stylish suit off then changed back into his usual alien body. 

“Well, if I hadn’t already been in the mood, I’d have been after watching that!” Yamcha said with a smile as they headed toward their bedroom. With each step his heart rate increased… he’d planned to ask Frieza to marry him once they were there. 

But there was still that one uncertainty… the former emperor’s strange and secretive actions recently. He wasn’t going to let that stop him… 

No secrets, they’d promised it. 

Yamcha had decided. He was going to trust Frieza. If he loved him enough to want to spend forever with him, well, he had to believe in that love, and the man he was giving it to. He took a deep breath and reached toward the bedroom door. 

Meanwhile, Frieza had also feeling a slight hesitation. He’d followed Bulma’s advice for a traditional, romantic Earth proposal so far- the fancy meal, the nice clothes, the important date- but the final part would be entirely his own idea. Yamcha had always liked cuddling after sex (he said the closeness helped him get his body ready for another round), whereas Frieza preferred to regain some degree of personal space between things. It wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy the other man’s touch, in fact he’d grown nearly addicted to it over the span of their time together. It was more of a need for a moment to recenter himself and regain his composure after participating in something as personal and vulnerable as their lovemaking. But tonight, he’d be the one to initiate the after sex snuggling, and then he’d ask the question… of so he planned. But there was how odd and elusive the human had been of late… 

They walked in silence, each caught up in their own thoughts, until they reached the bedroom door. Uncertainties aside, Frieza was looking forward to what they were about to do, and allowed himself a lingering glance at his gorgeous boyfriend’s body. 

But… “Yamcha. Wait a moment.” 

The human, who’d had the doorknob half turned, flinched and dropped his hand. “Yeah? What’s up?” 

“I need to ask you something, and I’d rather do it now while our heads are clear.” He folded his arms and glared accusingly up at his partner, yet somehow he couldn’t bring himself to ask about his odd behavior.

“Anything you need,” Yamcha replied, and, picking up on the stress in Frieza’s tone and posture, gently took his free hand. “You alright?” 

Looking into those kind eyes, so filled with love and concern, the former emperor felt such a strong emotional pull in his heart that for a moment he almost wondered if he’d accidentally switched back into human form. A quick flick of his tail confirmed nope, he was still Icejin. No excuse for being emotional then. He sighed, and smiled. “You’ve had an incalculably strange effect on me. It can be somewhat disconcerting what I allow from you yet would never tolerate from anyone else.” 

Yamcha chuckled. “I know right? Lucky me. I get to see you like no one else does… no wonder I love you so much.” He meant it too- he glanced back over at the bedroom door, ready to proceed. “But what did you wanna ask?” 

Frieza let go of his hand, reached into the pocket of his discarded jacket, and knelt down. “You’re the only man I’d ever kneel to, but I’d prefer you didn’t tell anyone that. It’s because… I trust you. Against my better judgement.” 

“Um, are you…” 

Shutting his eyes and nodding, the former emperor tried to ignore the undignified blushing he could feel staining his face. He pulled a small box out of the jacket pocket and opened it. “This isn’t quite how I planned this but I hope you’ll understand. Apparently I’m supposed to make a flowery and meaningful speech here but I’d rather keep things succinct. I adore you, my dear Yamcha. You’ll be mine permanently, won’t you?” 

Yamcha tackled him with a crushing hug. “Of course. Oh fuck, of course! But uh, I had something to ask you too…” 

Using his tail to push them back to their feet without letting go of the man that was now his fiancé Frieza asked, “Really now? And that would be?” 

Getting the door open at last Yamcha playfully shoved Frieza inside. “Heh, we think alike, don’t we?” 

Laughing as he looked at the rose petal covered bed and the open box containing a ring sitting in the center of it he turned back toward his beloved. “Indeed we do. This explains quite a few things I hadn’t understood about your recent behavior. I should have guessed…” 

“Same honestly! I can’t believe I didn’t figure it out. I guess occasional secrets are okay as long as they’re ones that lead to things like this,” he grabbed the ring off the bed and slid it onto Frieza’s finger, then looked down at their hands. “This is so cool… I mean, I’ve been yours completely for over two years now, but getting married to someone perfect has been a dream of mine since I was a teen!” 

“That Bulma was right, she said you’d get so sentimental,” he paused, then smirked at the human. “My only disappointment is that I knelt and you didn’t. If it’s such an important part of the tradition, I insist. You haven’t knelt to your lord since back when you were working for me.” 

Yamcha narrowed his eyes and gave Frieza his most dangerous smile before lowering his voice and whispering, “want me to kneel? …then make me.” 

The implication was unmistakable, and he grabbed the taller man, threw him on the bed, and jumped in after him. 

\- - - 

The timing of the actual proposal might had changed but Frieza stuck with his plan of cuddling after sex. Then again, he wasn’t sure if he had a choice, with as clingy as Yamcha was being for the last couple hours. He didn’t mind. It was, after all, a special occasion. 

Yamcha was laying on his back, his arms around his lover as he rested against his chest. “I can’t believe our lives were so close to touching for so many years before such bizarre events brought us together…” 

“Indeed… to think of the things I put you through without knowing. You’ve certainly claimed your revenge against me for that.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“By changing me from the most feared villain in the universe into…” 

“A respectable businessman?” 

Frieza chuckled. “That as well, I suppose. But I was thinking more of how soft hearted I’ve became, at least where you’re involved. But you’re right that it’s odd I found someone worth giving up my title for.” 

“Well, as far as I’m concerned,” Yamcha tightened his arms around the smaller man and gave him a quick kiss on top of the head, “you’ll always be ‘Lord Frieza’ to me, babe.” 

“Amusingly enough, if I was still considered ‘Emperor,’ once we were wed, you’d finally truthfully be royalty, ‘Prince Yamcha.’” 

“Hey, you’re right!” Yamcha rearranged his hold so that he could look the other man in the eyes. “Turns out I wasn’t lying to get your attention, I was just predicting the sorta future and hadn’t realized it yet!” 

“You’re ridiculous.” 

“And you love it.” 

“Indeed I do.” 

End Epilogue: The Promise

Author’s note: Sorry for the long delay for this, shit went sideways IRL for a minute and killed my ability to be creative or have the brainpower to do anything. 

It occurred to me while working on this that in all my years of writing fics this is the only proper time I’ve wrote proposals. Eh. I’m not great with this stuff. But I wanted some fluff at the end to tie everything back together and this gave me an excuse to do some callbacks to scenes from earlier in the fic and such. Anyway. 

But anyway the most important thing is this fic is done! SO MANY THANKS to everyone that read, and double thanks to everyone that supported with comments here or in the Discord! Bonus thanks to [SkinsT](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkinsT/works) for always being willing to listen to ideas, read my rough drafts, and in general help me figure out what I’m doing.

Biggest thanks of all to the inspiration for this whole thing, the talented artist that created the Icejin Yamcha design that got this started- if you haven’t already for some reason make sure to go check out [pen.lilixeesketche](https://www.instagram.com/pen.lilixeesketche/)!  
Anyway, thanks again. Writing this has been my escape with everything going wrong in the world. I’m honored to have shared the journey with everyone who has read it.


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